So Many Reasons
by spottedhorse
Summary: Set before the series began. The lab has hired a new CSI and Gil is training her. One thing leads to another and well, you just have to read and find out. I reserve the right to deviate from canon. And in fact, I do.
1. Chapter 1

"You want my what?" the wide eyed strawberry blonde asked him in a tone of voice that seemed to that challenge his sanity.

"A pint of your blood," he answered in his most reasonable voice. At least he hoped he sounded reasonable. Ever since he had been introduced to the rookie CSI at the beginning of the shift, Gil Grissom had felt anything but reasonable. He'd worked with plenty of female CSIs, but never one this beautiful or this genuinely sexy. The young woman just oozed sex appeal. Rarely did he find himself so attracted to a woman that he lost his ability to focus, but standing in his office with her, his mind was in a fog.

"What, are you a vampire or something? Why do you need my blood?" the feisty rookie shot back at him.

Gil Grissom was stunned. He stood there, his mouth slightly open, his eyes wide and, to her at least, looking all the world like an innocent little boy. She saw his shock at her verbal spar and made a mental note to herself. _Easy Catherine, this isn't The Palace. You don't need to protect yourself form him….not like that anyway."_

Struggling for mental clarity, he finally was able to clear the fog from his brain and reply. "So many reasons." A small smile worked at the corners of his mouth and there was a note of triumph in his eyes, she saw.

"Oh," she said meekly. _Tone it down sister or you're gonna get your ass tossed out the door before you ever collect your first paycheck. _"All your new hires give you blood?" she asked.

"Yes, they do." His smile grew. _Need to remember that line for when they ask. It seems to work well…._

"Okay then, I suppose it won't kill me."

"I promise to be gentle." His voice was quiet and reassuring as he went about the task of drawing blood. "Did you request graveyard or were you just assigned to it. Because I know there was also an opening on Swing."

"I requested it," she said as she watched him. He _was_ being very gentle. "I, um…I'm used to the hours."

"Oh? You worked nights at your previous job?"

"Yeah…so what do I do now? I mean, do we sit around and wait for a call or what?"

"Well, for tonight you just watch. You'll be with me. As the senior CSI on this shift, I usually get the toughest calls, so not all nights will be as challenging as this one. Our case," he said as he picked up a folder from his desk, "is a multiple homicide. The vics are in the morgue and the coroner is waiting for us."

"The coroner is waiting?"

"Yeah…you know, the autopsy."

Catherine Willows swallowed and followed him out of his office. _Great, dead people first thing…._

The night passed quickly for Catherine. The morgue had been tough but she had at least managed to keep her dinner down. She noticed that when they had finished and were leaving, he seemed to look at her with an expression of approval. For some reason that she didn't understand, his approval meant a lot to her.

She had gone with him to the crime scene and shadowed him as he moved through the house. At first he seemed deep in thought but after a few minutes, he began to talk to her, asking questions. Asking her what _she _saw or what _she_ thought. _Wow, nobody at The Palace gave a rat's ass what you thought or saw. All they cared is that you danced. _As the night wore on, his questions and his approving looks meant more and more to her. For the first time in her life, someone cared what she thought. It was new territory and she found the experience quite heady.

As the shift concluded, he looked across the layout table at her. "So what did you think of your first night?"

She looked into his lively blue eyes and saw his excitement. He loved his job and he loved sharing it. "It was awesome," she exclaimed.

He looked down at the table and then back up to her face. In contrast to her excitement, he spoke with a subdued tone. "I, um…usually take a rookie to breakfast after their first night, but I imagine you want to get home to your husband?"

She contemplated his shy gaze and realized she was being offered a gift. _And Eddie is probably still asleep anyway, if he is at home at all. _"Breakfast would be wonderful," she replied. "Eddie, my husband, is in the music business and is out very late with his clients. I imagine he's still asleep."

Gil swallowed as he watched her expression. She was telling half truths about her husband. _The guy's fool. A man would have to be,not be to be waiting for her to come home to him. _"Great. I'll meet you in the reception area in ten minutes, then." He smiled and abruptly left the room. Catherine shook her head. She'd never seen anyone just disappear like that before.

They went down the street to a breakfast house. After ordering, they settled into conversation. Catherine began because it had become obvious to her through the night that he could go for hours without talking to anyone.

"So, how long have you been at the lab?" she asked him._ Should be safe territory…_

"A few years," he answered with the mystery of a woman that had just been asked her age.

"And before the lab? It seemed to me in the morgue that you could have done the coroner's job, and probably better."

"Oh," he looked a little surprised. "I thought I was being careful about that." His brows furrowed and his gaze went to someplace inside his mind.

"Careful about what?" She asked.

"I was a corner in L.A. County before I got decided to become a criminalist. Sometimes I get a little too involved in the autopsies for the coroner's comfort."

"You were? Weren't you awfully young for that job?"

He seemed to shrug but she didn't see any body parts move. "I suppose I was…." He had that far away look again. Then suddenly he was back at the table with her.

"So why the change?" She asked with genuine curiosity.

His eyes warmed to her sincere interest. "I did get into the morgue early. I was an unofficial intern as a teenager and worked there all through college. As soon as I had the academic credentials, I applied for a slot that had opened and got it. But after a few years, the puzzle of what killed them just wasn't enough anymore. I wanted to know the how and sometimes even the why of it. For me, forensics is like a puzzle….and I like puzzles."

"That's kind of the way I see it," she said enthusiastically. "A big puzzle and now I get to be the kid that puts the pieces together to form the picture."

He saw the animation in her expression and knew that she wasn't just talking to impress the boss. She meant what she said. "You made some intelligent observations tonight, Catherine. You still have much to learn but I have no doubt that you will…as Francis Bacon said, 'Who questions much, shall learn much, and retain much.' And you seem to have a mind full of questions."

She looked at him in astonishment. _He thinks I'm intelligent…and he believes I can learn all of this. I mean, I know I can but no one else ever thought so. And most people don't like all my questions. He sees them as an asset. _Having always been admired for her body but never her mind, Catherine's self-confidence always depended on her physical appearance. She had seen him glance at her a few times during the night with a look that told her he did indeed appreciate her physical attributes, but now he was sitting across from her and admiring her mental ones.

"I know I'm going to be good at this job," she said with a new found confidence.

He smiled at her._ My god, she is so fiery and full of life. She'll be a challenge._ "Good. I'm looking forward to watching you grow into a good forensic scientist."

It was a pat response, she realized. _Probably says that to all the new hires. _"Oh, I'll be better than good," she smirked. "I'll be as good as you one day, maybe even do your job."

She was smiling at him but in her smile he saw daring. "Of that, I have no doubt," he replied assuredly.

Their conversation continued around things at the lab. She did manage to ask if he had a family and received a cryptic answer that she thought meant no. He asked a question about Eddie and she changed the subject.

Gil Grissom observed everything. That's what made him good at his job. Her avoidance of her husband as a topic of conversation wasn't lost on him. Filing it away for future consideration, he followed her into the new avenue of conversation.

As they were walking out of the door into the sunlight, she thanked him for breakfast. "Oh, it's a tradition," he responded. _Need to be sure it becomes one…. _"See you tonight."

"Yeah…you will," she smiled and waved as she walked to her car.

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"Happy the man who has been able to learn the causes of things." Virgil

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	2. Chapter 2

Catherine Willows didn't walk through the door to the apartment she and her husband shared; she floated. Her magic carpet was a combination of the euphoria of her first night as a CSI and the elation of breakfast with Gil Grissom. He thought she had brains, thought she would be good at her new job,…that one day she would be as good as he. After a lifetime of being told only that she was beautiful and never being given credit for being smart and always chastised for being curious, Grissom's admiration of those very qualities in her had sent her on a high that cocaine had never matched. It had been tough kicking the habit but she had done it because she'd never be hired as a CSI if she was on the white powder. Part of her had thought to go back to using once she was secure in her job, but after her first taste of the job, the high of coke didn't compare. Besides, Grissom would never approve or understand and his opinion of her meant too much to risk losing his high regard.

"You're late," growled Eddie from the doorway to the bedroom.

Startled, Catherine peered through the dark living room at him. "Eddie? I thought you'd be asleep."

"Well, I'm not. Thought I'd be a good husband and wait to hear about your first day on your new job," he sneered.

"Really?" Her happiness that he seemed to care was genuine. "It was great. I'm really going to like it, Eddie."

"Yeah, meet any dead bodies?" His sarcasm was lost on her because she was still on her high.

"Actually, yes. Two. And I went to the autopsy….and I even managed not to throw up. Grissom, that's the CSI who is training me, was proud. He said most new hires throw up the first time or two."

"Wow. Who's this Grissom guy?"

"Oh…he's a CSI III. Used to be a coroner but got into forensics and now is the senior CSI on grave. I guess that's why he was assigned to train me."

"Hmmm…must be old then?"

"No, at least he didn't seem old. Mid thirties, I'd guess."

Catherine didn't see the shift in Eddie's attention when she talked about Grissom. His demeanor was becoming aggressive as he stepped towards her. "He good looking?"

"Yeah, I guess…" _Damn right, he is - and those eyes…. _"I really wasn't paying too much attention to his looks, just trying to keep up with the job." It was then that she saw his hand and tried to raise her own in defense, but she was too late. He slapped her so hard that she fell against the wall, her hand instinctively moving to the offended cheek. "What was that for?" she snarled.

"You were flirting with him, weren't you?"

"No. I was not. Besides, even if I did flirt with, I doubt he would care."

"You mean, he's gay?" Eddie's lips curled into a sneer that made her go cold inside.

"I have no idea. But his work is his life and I don't think he has room for flirting or much of anything else."

Suddenly Eddie's mood changed. Reaching for her, he began to apologize. "I'm sorry, baby. I was just here in the dark, thinking all the wrong thoughts and then you came in late…"

"Well, there will be times when I am late…sometimes we have to finish processing a piece of evidence or an autopsy runs over….but I'm always coming home to you, Eddie."

He studied the red mark on her face and apologized again before kissing her. Catherine did what she always did, she gave in and let him have his way.

Meanwhile Gil Grissom had gone home to an empty apartment. It was the same apartment he'd been in since he moved to Vegas; a one bedroom with a view of the strip. There was nothing special about it and lately it had become a little cramped, his books and bug collections threatening to take over but he didn't see the need for change. All he needed it for was a place to sleep. But this morning his space seemed tiny.

He slipped into his usual position on his couch, kicking off his shoes in the process and resting his head on the arm. Also as usual, his right arm came up over his eyes, blocking the light. As his eyes closed, images began to play through his mind, images of her. _God, she is so beautiful…and graceful. She moves like a cat. And she's so smart. She's right, one day she will challenge me for my job…_He felt a new kind of excitement as he thought about his new protégé, an excitement that began in his loin. He felt heat building as his mind's eye replayed its film of her moving around the crime scene, of her face over breakfast, and of her wonderfully tight but curved ass as she walked away from him after breakfast. He shifted on the couch, hoping to relieve some pressure but he quickly realized that there was only one avenue of relief available to him. Sitting up, he sighed as he gathered his thoughts enough to head for the shower. Maybe a cold shower would quell his urges….

Two hours later Gil lay under his sheet, still unable to sleep. It was like he was addicted to his mental movie of her through the past night. Never had a woman affected him so; he realized somewhere in his fog that for him she was a perfect blend of grace and beauty…and brains, with a spicy attitude thrown in to make it more interesting. He wanted her, and Gil Grissom wasn't used to wanting a woman, not in that way at least. But she wasn't available. As he lay there, reality set in. He was going to be having a lot of restless, sleepless days because of one Catherine Willows.

Another couple of hours and sleep finally overtook him, but she invaded his dreams. He heard her laughter, saw her smirk, watched her ass, and felt her near him as he slept until finally, his mind was satisfied that she must really be in the bed next to him. Only then did it quiet and let him have peace.

When he awoke, some deep part of himself was disappointed to find that he was alone. His dreams had been so full of her that it had seemed real. And he found that he wanted the life that he had dreamed of, a life with her; somehow, in a few short hours, she had found a way into his deepest recesses. She had touched him in places that had remained locked away since the day his father died and he had become a dutiful son to his mother and then the reticent, self contained scientist that now walked the halls of the Las Vegas Crime Lab. As he laid his brief case on his desk, he was reminded of the words of Byron, "I slept and dreamt that life was beauty; I woke and found that life was duty." And as he smiled to himself, he realized that tonight's duty included Catherine.

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	3. Chapter 3

Catherine had tried to cover the bruise left by Eddie's slap but the make up just wasn't quite doing the job. It wasn't a bad bruise; he'd certainly inflicted worse, but it was there all the same, its faint discoloration showing through her pale foundation. She just hoped nobody would notice; but of course _he _did.

"Catherine, what happened?" he asked with sincerity, his fingers indicating the place on his own face that matched her bruise.

"What?" she tried to sound confused. "Oh…yeah. I tripped when I got out of bed to go to the bathroom…hit the foot of the bed on the way down."

He looked at her skeptically. _Like hell she did, I've seen enough of bruising like that to recognize it for what it is… Besides, she's too graceful for that story to be believable._ "You okay?"

"Yeah, I'm fine. Just feeling a little stupid is all." She wouldn't, couldn't look at him. She knew that he knew she was lying. _Damn I don't want to lie to him…him of all people. And he sounds so worried. I know he's not buying it but what else can I say. _

Studying her face a moment longer, his frown deepened. _Her husband…Eddie? He did that to her and now she's embarrassed. Bastard, she doesn't deserve to be treated like that, no one does…but especially not her._

They continued worked the double homicide from the night before, following the evidence, something that Grissom kept telling her never lies. "People lie, but the evidence never does," he'd said pointedly. _Yeah, he knows and now I'm a liar in his eyes, _she thought sadly.

She noticed that he glanced at her when he thought she wasn't looking several times through the night. There were looks of concern, admiration, and something else…longing maybe? She decided that fair was fair so she got in a few sideways glances of her own. She wished she had the nerve to run her fingers through those curls of his and for a moment a vision flashed through her mind of what those curls would look like after a night of uninhibited, pure raw sex. She felt a rush at the thought and felt the resulting moisture in her panties. He was deep in concentration and she watched as his lips worked themselves together until they looked like a fish kiss almost. She wanted to do something about those kissable lips….she knew just exactly what she would do with them too, she smirked.

He felt her watching him and felt a response south of his belt. He glanced at his hand to be sure that the tremors he felt on the inside weren't visible. Thankfully his hand was steady. Just knowing that she was standing so close and looking at him set him on fire and turned his bones to jelly. He wanted so much to touch her, kiss, her, claim her right there in the layout room. But somehow he maintained his self control. After all, she was married. And besides, he liked his job and would have been fired for doing the things that his body wanted him to do right now.

"So what does the evidence tell you, Catherine?" he said in a voice that he hoped was steady.

She looked at the length of his body and then back towards his face. _The evidence tells me that you and I are having very similar reactions to one another…_"Oh…um, well, gunshot wounds to the head, execution style. Hands bound behind them. Blindfolded.…Professional job, except our pro made some mistakes. He left cartridges at the scene, a cigarette butt outside, and he used the john and left urine stains on the rim of the bowl. So we have his DNA and a way to match his gun to the crime, when we find him."

"So, how do we find him?"

It would be nice if we had a database of DNA to compare too, but then DNA analysis is still relatively new, so…well, we can't use it until we find him. The bullets maybe? Perhaps he bought some ammo locally?"

Again he gave her that look of approval that she found she craved. "So, call over and have Detective Ley check out the gun shops. It is a long shot, but right now it is all we have…"

"You want me to call the detective?" she asked in disbelief. He wanted her to handle an important aspect of the case.

"Yeah, it was your idea, run with it." He smiled as he disappeared from the room.

The ammo idea proved to be a dead end but Grissom was very supportive of her when she told him about it. "I'm sorry Grissom, seems like I sent a detective and a couple of uniforms all over Vegas for nothing…"

"Don't be sorry," he said gently. "You followed up on a lead. That's what we do, follow the evidence. This time it didn't take us anywhere, but next time it might be what cracks the case. Don't ever be sorry for being thorough…"

"Thanks," she smiled. "But somehow I don't think Ley feels the same way about it." Her smile turned to a smirk.

"Oh, don't worry about Ley; he's a pussycat under that gruff exterior. He just likes to give us a hard time and sometimes we even let him."

"So, I was catnip for Ley on this?" Her tone was angry but her eyes betrayed that she was teasing.

"No," he said glibly, "but it is something for future thought. You'd be delicious catnip."

_Oh god, did I really say that? Damn…_

She looked at him, half shocked and half amused. _Can't let that pass…. _"So you think I'm delicious?"

Grissom pretended to be deep in thought over the file in his hand and didn't answer. But Catherine followed the evidence; his ears had turned red and the file was upside down in his hand. He heard her and he was flustered. She filed it away in memory. _Somehow I doubt that this guy gets flustered like that often._

He sent her to trace to check on some threads that had been found at the scene and then to ballistics to see what else they might have discovered about the gun that shot their victims. Grissom tried the rest of the night to keep some distance between them, afraid of what he might do or say if he stayed too close to her.

As the shift ended she appeared in his office doorway. "Breakfast?" she asked. "My treat?"

He looked up at her leaning against his door frame and was glad the desk covered his response. "Uh…" His brain was telling him no but the rest of him had different ideas. "I have a better idea…."

He opened the door to his apartment and glanced back to see her walking up the path from the parking lot. She had followed him in her car. Once inside, he invited her to make herself comfortable while he fixed breakfast. Once in the kitchen, he decided that maybe a glass of O.J. was in order and poured one for each of them. Carrying hers into the living room, he saw her perusing his collections. "Orange juice?" he offered.

She turned as smiled, lighting up the room and his existence. "Great," she answered as she took the glass. She took a sip and then made a funny face.

"Too strong?" he asked, concerned with pleasing his guest.

"Not strong enough…got any vodka in your kitchen?"

His brow furrowed as he tried to understand her response. "A…vodka?"

"Screwdriver?"

"Ah….no, I don't have any." _You are stocking some today…_

"Oh…oh well," she relaxed and looked around the room.

"Okay…well, I'll just be in the kitchen, if you need anything…." He turned and headed in the direction of food….and safety.

Breakfast was quiet but friendly. She reveled in his warmth and charm, quiet as it might be. _I wish Eddie and I could do this…._

He managed to maintain his self control, although he realized he was in dangerous territory with her here in his apartment. He rarely had anyone over and it usually unnerved him to have people scrutinizing his things so closely. But he's found that he enjoyed her scrutiny. Having her in his apartment, however, made him feel how truly small it was. _Need to find a bigger place…_

Once the meal was finished and the light chatter had died down, she excused herself and prepared to head home. Grissom walked her to her car and then, as she turned around to thank him once more, he did something he rarely ever did; he touched someone… her. His finger gently traced the bruise on her cheek. "I hope you don't have anymore _accidents_ at home," he said. "But if you do, you know where to find me…"

Her eyes looked at her feet. She couldn't look at his eyes, knowing that he knew. "Yeah, thanks," she said as she climbed into her car.

He stood in the parking lot and watched her drive away.

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	4. Chapter 4

Grissom called a realtor about a rental he saw listed in the paper and the man agreed to meet him to show him some properties. As they visited several places, the realtor, John Wier, convinced him that it was time to buy rather than rent. So the search changed from a rental to a house to buy. After finishing with Wier, he drove back to his apartment stopping at the liquor store to buy vodka. Next time anyone wanted a screwdriver, he would be prepared. Once he had taken care of a few housekeeping details, he headed for bed, falling asleep almost immediately.

Catherine slipped into her apartment quietly, hoping again this morning that Eddie would be asleep. She knew it had been dangerous to go to Grissom's after work, but she treasured time spent with him. He made her feel good about herself. He saw beyond her outward beauty and was interested in what was inside. No one, except maybe for Jimmy, had bothered to look beyond the obvious.

As she moved into the living room, she realized that she was safe. Either Eddie was asleep or he wasn't home. Easing into the bedroom, she realized that the latter was the case. Their bed was empty. She stripped to her underwear and slipped into some pjs. After brushing her teeth, she crawled into bed, closed her eyes, and drifted to sleep. Her mind was still active however, and images from her conversations with Grissom played through her mind.

Eddie arrived home later in the morning and found her asleep. Quietly, he undressed and slipped into the bed beside her where he also slipped into a deep slumber. His sleep was a result of too much to drink instead of Catherine's reason, being tired from work.

She woke late in the afternoon, gently pushing Eddie's hand off her hip and slowly easing out of bed. After a trip to the bathroom, she went into the kitchen in search of food. A few minutes later, Eddie found her at the kitchen table eating leftover spaghetti. "Hey babe, how was your night?"

"Okay, still working on that double homicide. Grissom let me follow a lead on my own but it turned into a dead end."

"He let you go out on your own?"

"Well, kind of…Detective Ley was asking all the questions."

"Detective Ley?"

"Yeah…homicide. Has thirty years in. Said he was just waiting to be old enough to collect Social Security before retiring." Eddie seemed to like her description of the detective…better than he liked her description of Grissom the night before.

"Old buzzard, huh?"

"Getting there, for sure. But he's a good detective to know. Has lots of experience."

"Yeah babe, that's good." She could tell he was losing interest.

Grissom woke up sometime later. He fixed a box meal, one that his mother would never approve of, but it seemed easy. There was a message on his answering machine from the realtor. He had a property to show him. Gil called him back and arranged to see it in the morning.

He spotted the bottle of vodka sitting on the counter and smiled. Screwdrivers were not his drink of choice but he had a suspicion that it might become one of his favorites. His mind kept warning him that she was unavailable but he couldn't get past how she made him feel. He knew he was playing a dangerous game. He wanted…needed to spend time with her, she her smile, hear her laugh; but he didn't want to get in the middle of her marriage, even if the guy was a jerk. He wanted her to have whatever she wanted, to be happy. He just wanted to be around to see her happy.

After a quick shower, he headed out the door to the lab. As he drove into the lot, he saw Catherine getting out of her car. He pulled in next to her car and hurried to catch up to her.

Catherine saw his car pull in and heard his footsteps as he hustled to catch up. She smiled inwardly at his eagerness. There was a lot about the man that she didn't understand, but this she understood. _And Eddie thought he was gay….. well, probably should let Eddie keep thinking that._

Little was said as they walked together into the building. Catherine was enjoying the feel of him next to her, somehow he felt safe and secure to her. He was simply tongue tied and didn't know what to say. Once they were inside and had a new case to investigate, he felt more assured and was able to find plenty to say. Unfortunately, it was all about a dead body.

As the shift ended, Catherine decided she'd better not push her luck with Eddie and headed straight home. Gil looked for her in the locker room, but when he couldn't find her, he realized that the bottle of vodka would go unopened that day.

Later that morning, he met with the realtor and looked at the property. John Wier babbled on and on about how perfect it would be for him. It was a converted loft, near the strip but away from the high crime areas; perfect for a bachelor, he said. Gil reserved judgment until he saw it. They arrived a few minutes later and Gil had to admit that it looked promising. There was plenty of parking and as they walked in, he was struck by the simplicity of it. Most of the space was open, the kitchen, dining area and living room essentially one. There was a nice sized bedroom and a second room that could be another bedroom or a study. He was impressed with the amount of natural light in each room. There would be too much in the bedroom and he would have to find a remedy, but he liked the idea of so much light in the rest of the place.

The kitchen wasn't large but it would be adequate for his needs. _We could hang out and talk while I fix breakfast,_ he thought. He looked across the room to the living area and imagined her on his couch…there, under the windows, the light playing in her red hair.

"I'll take it," he said, turning to Wier.

He spent some time working out the terms of his offer on the place and then headed home, satisfied that he was making a good move. If nothing else, he would have plenty of space for his books and collections. And with any luck he would share many screwdrivers over breakfast with a certain strawberry blonde.

They fell into a routine of working together with a little flirting from time to time; nothing too obvious or direct. For her the flirting was a game, something that came naturally. For him, it was a need. He needed her smiles, her occasional touches, and the way she looked at him when she thought he didn't see. Slowly she learned little tidbits about the man; his favorite foods, the fact that he had skipped several grades in school, that he was an only child but nothing that gave any clues to who he really was. He learned little things about her too; she was a dancer before becoming a CSI, she met Eddie through a friend at a club, no one ever gave her credit for being smart…little things like those.

Days evolved into weeks and finally Gil closed on his townhouse. He moved in over the weekend and spent his entire time off arranging his butterfly collections on the walls, building his library in the study, and buying a few pieces of new furniture for the place. One of the last boxes he unpacked contained the still unopened bottle of vodka. He carefully placed it in the cabinet, next to the glasses. He hoped that soon he would have a reason to open the bottle.

After he was satisfied that everything was in its place, he headed for bed. Anxious for the next morning, he planned on asking her over for breakfast. He wanted to show her his new house. He really, really hoped that she would like it. Sleep came slowly with him dozing off and waking several times before settling into a deep sleep. In one of his waking moments, he was reminded of a quote from Arthur Miller, "I cannot sleep for dreaming; I cannot dream but I wake and walk about the house as though I'd find you coming through some door." When sleep fianlly came, his dreams were filled with her. While his conscious mind was unaware of it, somewhere deep in his sub-conscious there was awareness that he had fallen in love and that for now at least, the only avenue for his emotions was through his dreams. And so he dreamed.

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	5. Chapter 5

Catherine was getting ready for work when Eddie came home. He was high she could tell, and in a friendly mood. Nuzzling up to her, he kissed her and then began to fondle. "Eddie, as much as I'd like to stay and play I have to go to work."

He grunted and stepped away. "Oh, by the way babe, I have to go to Reno tonight. Won't be back until late tomorrow."

"Reno? What's in Reno?"

"A new band that I'm thinking of taking on. Need to go talk to them. You be okay while I'm gone?"

"Yeah, but I'll miss you." She smiled, knowing that's what he wanted to hear.

As soon as Grissom walked in the door to the lab, he knew it would be a busy night. Most of Swing Shift was still there and still busy. The night shift supervisor caught him in the hall and asked if Willows was ready to fly solo yet.

"Depends on the case," he answered. What have you got for her?"

"A B&E. I'll be sure a uniform stays with her. Detective Ley will be at the scene but I'm sure the way the day is going, he'll be called away."

"Yeah, she can handle it. Probably time too."

"Thanks Gil."

Grissom watched Supervisor Cavallo walk away. Once he had been a good investigator, but since taking the job as supervisor he had become a politician. Gil supposed that he was pretty good at it, but he just hated the way the man had sold out. And more than that, he hated the way the man said his name. Besides, he preferred that people call him Grissom around the lab. Gil was his given name and he felt like only people who were close to him should use it. He certainly didn't feel close to Cavallo.

The assignments were handed out after everyone arrived. Catherine was excited to get a solo. Gil watched her from across the table and delighted when her face lit up. As Cavallo handed him his assignment, he added some information that was not on the paper. "The detective at the scene is new…Jim Brass. He's from back East with experience there, so he is not new to the job, just to Vegas." Cavallo looked over his glasses at Gil. "Go easy on him Gil. Please."

Everyone around the table chuckled as Gil looked at Cavallo in surprise. The supervisor saw that Grissom really didn't understand and felt a need to explain. "You are so hard on new detectives, giving them so much grief about contaminating a crime scene. All I'm saying is give this guy a break. He knows his job."

Gil smirked but as they all left the room, Catherine could see he was aggravated by the supervisor's comments. Catching up to him in the hall, she nudged him. "So, you really going to cut this new guy any slack?"

"Don't know. We'll see what the evidence says about him knowing his job."

Catherine let out a little laugh. "Guess that means no then, doesn't it?"

Grissom smiled at her; not because he agreed with what she was saying, but because he loved the sound of her laughter.

Grissom arrived at the scene, a warehouse off of Industrial, where he found the new detective standing next to a body. The man was shorter than average, had thinning hair, and was solidly built. As Grissom approached him, he was impressed by two things. First, the guy had an aura of command about him. And second, despite an average kind of face, there was wariness and intense intelligence in his eyes. Gil's immediate impression was that this man really did know what he was doing.

"Gil Grissom," he introduced himself as he approached the detective.

"Jim Brass," the man said, those eyes evaluating Grissom as he spoke. He watched Grissom as he surveyed the area and then looked towards the body. "Coroner here yet?" Gil asked.

"En route. ETA about ten minutes." Brass paused and then shifted his tone. "So you're the infamous Gil Grissom?"

Grissom looked at him in surprise. "I wouldn't know about the infamous part…" was all he said.

"Yeah, well….I got a warning from every detective on duty when they heard that you'd be responding. Said you would bust my chops for messing with your crime scene. You gonna bust my chops?" There was some antagonism in his voice but also a playfulness to his tone.

Grissom's eyes darted to the man's face and saw the humor in his eyes and realized the guy was teasing him. "Not yet," he replied with equal playfulness.

Catherine arrived at her B&E, a market in an older part of Vegas that was filled with run down motels and seedy characters. She was glad the uniform had been told to stay with her. She quickly understood what had happened. Someone had broken into the market through the back door. They had stolen beer and food from the back storeroom without anyone in the front of the store being aware of them. Now it was her task to find out 'the who' of the situation.

Her collection of evidence took a couple of hours but when she had finished, she was satisfied that she had everything there was to find. After thanking the uniform, she headed back to the lab with fingerprints, blood swabs, impressions of the gauges made by whatever tool was used to break in with, and some casts of shoe prints from outside. Once back at the lab, she began the task of evaluating her evidence.

Grissom had collected the evidence from his scene too and was now headed back to the lab. He had been impressed with the new cop, Brass. He did indeed know his job and had been helpful at the scene. Too often the cops got in the way, but Brass had worked parallel to Grissom, dealing with possible witnesses and other people of interest while Gil dealt with the physical evidence. It didn't hurt that the guy had a sense of humor and even seemed to get most of Gil's little jokes.

At the lab, the two CSIs went about their work, barely seeing one another as the shift wore on. Late in the shift, Gil was in his office when Brass walked in. "So this is the wild kingdom that everyone's been telling me about…" he quipped as he entered. Gil looked up and smirked as Brass continued. "Just hope I don't end up in one of your glass jars one day."

Gil was never quite sure how to respond to people making fun of his specimens and so usually just ignored their comments. He did the same with Brass and moved on to their investigation. "Get anything from any of the witnesses?" he asked.

Brass's eyes darted back to Grissom from one of the jars, still with a hint of humor in them. "Not really anything useful. What have you found out?"

"COD was blunt trauma to the head….round object about an inch in diameter. I found several things at the scene that could be the weapon. They are being processed now. The shoe impressions are a size 12 and appear to be from an athletic shoe. Threads were found on the vic's clothing that don't match, so trace is running with that. We have so many prints from the scene that it will be difficult to narrow them down to a suspect. But if the evidence points in a particular direction, we can use them to confirm a suspect's presence at the scene.

"Ah, okay then…" Brass was about to leave when Catherine Willows came into Grissom's office, so excited that she looked like she could be bouncing. "I did it!" she exclaimed happily. "I solved the B&E." Her face was beaming as she looked at Grissom and then suddenly she became aware of the other person in the room. Quieting a little, but still excited, she smiled at Jim Brass." Hi, I'm Catherine Willows." Brass returned her smile and introduced himself.

Grissom had been caught up in her excitement but then realized her should help with the introductions. "Catherine, Jim is the newest addition to our detective squad. And Jim, Catherine is our newest CSI." Gil watched as the two sized each other up.

Finally Catherine spoke up, "well, I'll get back to work. I need to finish the report on the first case I solved on my own…well, with help from Detective Ley," she nodded in Jim's direction.

The two men watched her walk out of the room, each appreciating the view from behind. Brass turned to Grissom and commented." Oh man, I'd love to be in your shoes. Busting her chops could be fun."

Gil looked at the smile on the detective's face and frowned. "What?"

Jim's smile disappeared as he looked at the CSI. "She's beautiful. Surely you…"

"She's married. And besides, it wouldn't be appropriate to date a co-worker." Grissom's tone was harsh and unforgiving.

Jim studied the other man's face and nodded. "Yeah, you're right of course," he said as he realized that the man across from him had it bad. "Course, that didn't prevent my ex from giving it up to my brothers in blue….butshe is probably different." Jim watched carefully for Gil's response.

"She is," he said flatly. "She isn't the type…"

Jim had been around some and knew what kind of woman Catherine Willows was. He aslo got the feeling this guy lived in a cocoon. _Of course she's the type, _he thought… _under the right circumstances. But you, on the other hand, couldn't handle it. _Yeah, you're probably right. I guess I'm just still stinging from my ex's hanky panky…." Jim wondered how long it would take his new colleague to realize that he was seriously in love with the red head.

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Still good? Please review. What's next, you wonder...well...I'll give you a teaser; Gil shows his new house to Catherine.;-)


	6. Chapter 6

Grissom found Catherine in the locker room at the end of the shift. As he stood in the doorway watching her, he was struck again but how beautiful she was. A funny feeling began to gnaw in his stomach and be was barely able to speak. "Hey Catherine," he said as he walked into the room. She looked up from her locker and smiled at him which gave him the courage to continue with his plan. "How about breakfast to celebrate solving your first solo case?"

Catherine looked at the man standing beside her. He looked so shy and yet so hopeful that it touched something in her heart. _Why not? Eddie is in Reno so it's not like anyone is at home waiting for me… _"Sure, sounds great. I feel like celebrating."

Once again she followed him in her car but was confused when they turned just a few blocks down and headed away from his apartment. Finally he pulled into a parking area outside a row of buildings that looked kind of like warehouses. She pulled her car in next to his and climbed out. "Grissom?" she asked befuddled.

"I want to show you something," he smiled mysteriously.

She really hadn't learned much about the man since she'd met him but one thing she did know was that she could trust him; there was nothing sinister in his motives. So she followed him. He led her to a grey door that he opened and gestured for her to enter. Once she was inside, she looked around, stunned. His things were inside the building. As her look travelled around the room she realized that he was now living here. Turning to him, her eyes questioned.

"I bought it. It's a townhouse." He was beaming.

"You bought it? But …I thought you said you liked living in your little apartment."

"I did, but it was getting too small. I realized that when you were over for breakfast before. There wasn't much place to sit and you had to step over everything. I was used to it but I saw how awkward it was. Besides, now I can display all of my butterfly collections and I was able to unpack all of my books. I have a study." He was babbling and he knew it but couldn't seem to stop. On some level he found it embarrassing but he was so excited that he didn't care.

Catherine smiled at him. For a moment she thought she had a glimpse of what he must have been like as a child. He was so excited and showing off his new acquisition to her…his friend? _But wait…isn't it usually your best friend that you want to show your new stuff to first? Slow down girl, who's to say you are the first one to see his new place?_

"So, how do you like it?" he asked. "You're the first person that's seen it. I'm not used to having people in my house, so I don't know how…."

"It's nice," she said as she looked around again. "It fits you. And I love all the butterflies. Gives it some color and warmth. You said you have a study?" He was looking at her with such anticipation. What was he expecting from her? Had she misread him all along? _Probably just wants what everyman wants from me,_ she thought with disappointment.

He showed her the door to the study and she stepped into that room. One whole wall was books and journals. There was a desk with a small filing cabinet and a comfortable chair in the corner. The perfect room for Gil Grissom, the scientist.

"You going to bring home any of your jars from the lab?"

"Probably not," he said. "I will probably collect some new ones for here. But I might bring Harry home."

Catherine shivered as she thought about Harry, the tarantula. She kept hoping the thing would die or something, but Gil seemed very comfortable with letting the fuzzy spider crawl on him at the lab.

Gil was watching her, trying to see if she liked his new place or not. Finally she turned towards him and smiled. "It is so perfect for you, Grissom. I'm so glad you showed it to me."

He released a breath that he didn't know he'd been holding and felt warm all over. _She likes it_, he thought happily to himself. "So, ready for breakfast? I even got some vodka if you want to fix us some screwdrivers."

A little later in the morning breakfast had been prepared and consumed and half the bottle of vodka was gone. Catherine was sitting on the end of the couch, her legs curled up under her and her eyes just a little blurry from being tired and consuming one or two screwdrivers too many. They had chatted for a long time but now he was simply watching the light play through her hair as it shone through the window behind her. The booze was having an effect and her eyelids were getting droopy. He smiled as she dozed of on his couch. Her head tilted over to rest on the back of the couch and she looked quite content, he thought. He knew that he was very content to just watch her.

_The light really does enhance her hair color, _he thought as he studied her, in awe_. And her complexion is so fair with out being pale…just touches of color in the appropriate places. She looks do peaceful. _He tilted his head to match the angle of hers as he thoughtfully observed her. He sighed deeply, contentedly as his eyes wandered over her. _She's the most beautiful woman I've ever met…and so smart too. Not just book smart, but smart about people…_

Eventually her head slid off its resting place and she awoke with a jerk. Startled she looked up to see him watching her. He smiled that wonderfully sweet, gentle smile of his and an odd sense of loneliness shot through her. _I wish Eddie would smile at me like that…_

Glancing at the clock on his shelves, she jumped into action. "Oh no, I need to get home," she exclaimed, flustered. "I want to go to bed early so I can wake up to see Eddie before work tonight."

"Okay," Gil said. He was disappointed that she was leaving but knew he had no right to ask her to stay longer.

As she stood in the door, ready to leave, she smiled at him and planted a small kiss on his cheek. "That's congratulations for your new home, Gil. Thank you for showing it to me." And then she was gone.

As he cleaned up the breakfast things, his mind wandered over the morning. She called him Gil…he liked the way she said his name. And she liked his place, enough that she kissed him to congratulate him. Normally he didn't like to be touched and certainly not in such an intimate way, although he could think of a few exceptions. But her touch… her touch was heaven.

He headed for the bedroom and once again crawled under the covers to dream of her. _What are you doing? She's married, remember? The most you will ever be it her friend…. _His mind wandered over the situation, over the look of her on his couch with the light playing in her hair, over her departing kiss. Something stirred within him and for the first time, he realized that he was falling in love with her. _You can't let it go anywhere. She loves her husband; but even of she didn't, you don't mess with a married woman. You know that. It is wrong…._ His thoughts and emotions were at war. He knew that loving her was wrong. _But how can loving someone be wrong? _She was someone else's wife. _You can love her; you just can't do anything about it. _As long as he didn't act on his feelings, things would be okay, he decided. And just being around her was enough…for now at least.

Settling in deeper under the covers, he smiled as he anticipated dreaming of her…of them together. "A man's moral conscience is the curse he had to accept from the gods in order to gain from them the right to dream." The quote from Faulkner popped into his head just as he was about to slip into sleep. Once his eyes closed and his mind drifted into the dense fog of sleep, his mind was able to go free. Unbounded by conscience or reason, he dreamed of her, them together in his special place he had made for them.

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Grissom's got it (the lovebug) pretty bad, doesn't he? LOL. Please review; keeps the juices flowing.


	7. Chapter 7

Catherine hurried home, wondering why she was playing this dangerous game. She knew Eddie would be upset if he knew that she had gone to Grissom's. He'd be even more upset if he knew how long she had stayed.

But there was something about Grissom; at first she thought it was because he valued her intelligence, but she realized this morning at his new house that there was something more about him. He treated her with such kindness and respect. Eddie would always see her as a stripper, just a few notches above a whore. Grissom treated her like she was a real lady. On her drive home, she vowed that she would always try to live up to his view of her. She liked the way Grissom treated her.

Once home she did a few quick chores and then headed to bed. Lying in the dark room, her mind began to wander, thinking mostly of Grissom. The enigmatic scientist intrigued her. He certainly wasn't like anyone else she'd ever met. A smile crept over her face as her mind's eye surveyed his physical appearance…_eye candy_, she thought. His blue eyes were so intense at times and so guarded at others. But how his face lit up when he smiled. At times he looked like a little boy and at other times, he looked old and wise.

_Wonder what kind of woman he dates? Does he date? I don't think he's gay. The way I've caught him looking at me a few times…no, defiantly not gay. So what's the deal with him? He hasn't made any moves on me, although I've sensed a couple of times that he wanted to. So what's up with him? And why are you thinking about him like this? Remember Eddie…._

When she got to the lab, she saw that Grissom's car was already there. Hopping out of hers, she hustled inside. The meeting was about to begin so she scurried in and found a seat almost directly across from him. He glanced at her and she thought she saw something in his look, something almost like fear.

Cavallo handed out assignments, pairing Grissom and Willows. They had a DB at the residence of one of Vegas' leading citizens, Guido Bacherelli. They gathered their kits and climbed into Grissom's CSI vehicle. Both were quiet on the drive to the Bacherelli home, only the radio providing any sound. Catherine was lost in her thoughts, wondering why he was so quiet after their warm, comfortable morning. Gil was just plain scared. His dreams about her had been vivid and he now had a clear understanding of just how deep his feelings for her were. He was in deep and he knew it was too late to pull out, not that he wanted to; but he wasn't sure how long he could keep an appropriate distance. He just knew he had to be near her and at the same time was frightened about being so close.

Adding to his misery the radio began to play an old Jim Croce song. He thought about changing the station but decided it would be too obvious, so he endured as the lyrics poured over him.

_Don't you know I had a dream last night  
And you were here with me  
Lyin' by my side so soft and warm  
And you said you'd thought it over  
You said you were coming home  
But when I woke up  
Oh my dream it was gone  
_

The picture his mind was drawing of her beside him was almost unbearable…and bliss at the same time. And he knew the sadness of waking up to find that the dream was indeed gone.

_I'm not the same  
Can you blame me  
Is it hard to understand  
I can't forget  
You can't change me  
I am not that kind of man_

He wasn't the same. But she could change him; she had already.

_Don't you know I had a dream last night  
And ev'rything was still  
And you were by my side so soft and warm  
And I dreamed that we were lovers  
In the lemon scented rain  
But when I woke up  
Oh I found that again, I had been  
Dreamin', dreamin' again  
I had been dreamin', dreamin' again_

Catherine felt his discomfort, especially at the line about being lovers. He had squirmed just a little. _So, he does have those feelings about me. So, why doesn't he try anything? Is he really that principled?_

He felt her blue eyes on him, deep in thought. Warmth flushed through his body and headed to his groin. _Damn, I can't be doing this time every time I am around her. I need to focus on the case…. _He knew he was losing the battle, however. No matter how focused his mind was, his body would betray his feelings.

As they climbed out of the SVU at the scene, he grabbed his kit and walked away from her. It felt rude to him, but he needed to put some space between the two of them. Spotting Jim Brass near the door, he made his way towards the detective.

"Body's out back," Jim began. The two men started walking through the house as Brass continued. "Caterina Bacherelli, wife of the owner. He called it in. You'll want his clothes, they are covered in blood. When I got the call, I was told to be careful. His little retail empire here is a suspected front, a money laundering operation for the mob's dirty money." Jim paused. Looking back, he asked "what's with her?"

Gil looked surprised. Glancing over his shoulder, he asked "what do you mean?"

"Well, she seems a little confused….and angry."

Gil looked at her again and saw the hurt expression in those eyes he loved so much. His stomach plummeted and he felt sick; he had hurt her. Suddenly he wanted to crawl in the ground and hide. Turning back to Brass, he swallowed and responded. "I don't know. Ah…I'll be right back." He put his kit down and walked toward her.

"Catherine?" he said in his most tender tone. She looked at him with such sadness. He could see tears that she was fighting back. He felt like a louse. "You okay?"

She wouldn't look directly at him. "Did…did I do something to make you angry? I mean, everything seemed okay this morning but tonight…you are so …I don't know, it's like you don't want me around. And I don't know what the hell you want me to do…here at the scene, I mean." Her sadness was turning to anger.

Gil closed his eyes, trying to think of a suitable response. Somehow he didn't think pulling her into his arms, hugging her, and confessing his love was the right way to go…although at that moment, he was tempted. "I'm sorry Cath…you didn't do anything wrong and I'm not angry. It's just that I tend to get tunnel vision when I'm working a case. Everything else falls away and all I see is the case in front of me. I thought you knew that about me by now." He tried to lighten the mood but his own heart was so heavy that he doubted that he succeeded.

"I had noticed that you seem to get single minded, but you've never been so distant before. I'm sorry; I just read something else into it." Finally she looked at him. And she saw his worried eyes looking back at her. She could tell he really was upset that he had hurt her. _Okay, so he's kind of socially inept. But you knew that already. He gets his mind going and he forgets everything else. He didn't mean to be rude…_"So, where are we with the case?"

Something flashed across his face…relief? "_We_ are at the beginning. Come with me and Jim can fill us in on the preliminaries."

Her smile lit his insides. All he wanted at that moment was to stand there in bask in it, but they had a case and so he led her over to Jim.

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I'm sure the little button is there somewhere...Please use it.


	8. Chapter 8

Brass stood nearby as the CSIs checked over the body. The assistant coroner was on his way and so they could only look, not touch. "She's wearing a pretty thin nightie," observed Catherine.

Gil looked at her, amused. "Are you blushing?"

Catherine did a double take before catching the humor in his eyes. Brass snickered from a few feet away. "No. But it is odd that she would be outside in such a thin number without a robe."

Grissom considered her observation. "But she is in her backyard with lots of fences and trees. Plenty of privacy."

Catherine looked at him, shaking her head. "You go outside in your jockey shorts, even when things are private?" She heard Brass chuckle at that one.

Gil was the one who blushed. Gathering his courage though, he retorted. "I might, under the right circumstances." He smiled at her mysteriously.

"Well, somehow I doubt that she did." Catherine said as she looked back at the body of Caterina Bacherelli. "Besides, if he's mob, there are body guards around. She wouldn't be flaunting it for them…or maybe?"

"You think she was out here with a body guard and the husband found them?" Grissom asked doubtfully.

"Not really." She was still looking over the wife of the mobster.

"So…what else do you see?" Grissom was moving into his mentor mode, always giving the younger CSIs a chance to grow. He watched as she studied the body.

"Looks like a gunshot wound at the back of her head but we can't really see yet. I see no signs of an exit wound, so maybe the bullet is still inside." Her eyes travelled to the woman's neck. "No signs that she knew what was coming….it all happened from behind. At least, I think it did. Her hands show no signs of struggle."

Gil nodded; she got better with every investigation. "Anything else?"

Her eyes travelled further down her body. "No slippers. She came outside without shoes. Why?" The senior CSI tilted his head as he waited for her to keep going. "Feet have mud on the bottom." She looked around and spotted a flowerbed next to the patio. Standing, she walked over to it and then around it. "Footprints…probably hers. I'll take impressions." Picking up her kit, she opened it and went to work on the impressions.

Gil continued studying the body. He heard Jim clear his throat. "Incoming," he said quietly.

Grissom looked up to see the Sheriff walking out of the house towards them. Gil stood and moved closer to Jim. "Gentlemen," the Sheriff greeted them. Both men nodded an acknowledgment. "What can you tell me?"

"Not much yet." Gil stated. "We're still doing the preliminaries."

"Do you think this is a random killing or maybe a mob thing?"

Gil sighed in frustration; he hated the high profile cases. The pressure was always high and came early. "It's too soon to tell, although it seems unlikely that it is random. Not with all the body guards."

The Sheriff looked around and then at the dead woman. "Keep me posted," was all he said as he walked away.

Both men relaxed as the man moved into the house. "I hate it when the big brass is circling," sighed Jim.

"Yeah," Gil agreed, already deep in thought again about the evidence.

A few minutes later the coroner showed up and Grissom hovered as the man examined the body. Once he was finished, he asked the CSI if he wanted to process the body at the scene or wait to do it at the morgue.

"Take her back to the morgue. We can process her there. Just don't disturb anything…"

By that time Jim was talking to one of the body guards, trying to get some information and getting nowhere. Gil approached him and suggested that maybe it was time to seriously interview the husband. They found him inside at the kitchen table, eating a ham sandwich.

The two investigators exchanged a look of disbelief before approaching Guido Bacherelli. "Excuse me, Mr. Bacherelli. We have some questions," Jim began.

"Sure," the mobster replied. "Have a seat. I'll have Consuela fix you some sandwiches."

"Ah, thank you…but no." Gil was careful to mask his disgust at the gangster's attitude but Brass saw through it. Silently he agreed with Gil, the man at the table wasa pig.

While the two men questioned the husband, Catherine was busy outside the house. She walked the area, searching for clues. She found several cigarette butts near the corner of the house, another set of footprints near the patio, and a shell casing near a shrub at the corner of the patio. She carefully photographed everything and collected her findings. Standing next to the shrub, she visualized Caterina walking out of the house, across the patio, and into the yard. Catherine assumed the role of the person standing near the shrub and saw that the line of sight would be perfect for a shot at the dead woman. Satisfied that she had covered the area thoroughly, she walked into the house. She made her way inside carefully, eyeing each area as she passed through it. Eventually she arrived in the woman's bedroom. The room was a mess. The bedcovers were flung off the bed and a chair was turned over in the corner. Clothes were strewn around in a haphazard manner. Drawers at the dresser were hanging partially open, as were the drawers of her chest. There was a metal vanity stool near the foot of the bed. She looked at it closely and found a bent edge on it. There were drops of blood on the carpet next to it. Again she used the camera to document the room and then opened her kit to get what she needed to collect the evidence. From there she moved into the bathroom.

After they had finished questioning the husband, Gil left Jim to question the body guards while he went to find Catherine. She was bent over the bathroom sink, scrutinizing the drain and swabbing for blood. Standing in the doorway behind her, Gil momentarily forgot about the case. Instead, he was scrutinizing her…one particular aspect of her, her tush. _My god, how am I supposed to ignore that! _He felt a now familiar heat in his nether region and a tightening in his pants. His heart was racing, pounding in his ears. He had never wanted someone so much in his life. Rubbing his fingers along his thumb, he fought to keep his hands at his side instead of reaching for her. 

As she finished her task and straightened up, Catherine caught a glimpse of him in the bathroom mirror. _He looks so flustered…so hot. _A slight smile worked at the corners of her mouth. _So he does think of me in that way… Poor guy, he looks like he's about to pop a blood vessel or something._ Turning, she acted like she didn't know he was there at first. Then she looked up and acted startled, "Oh…Grissom…."

Her reaction startled him. He looked up, confusion and fear in his expression. His mouth opened like he was about to say something but no words came out. She stood there, waiting for him to say something; anticipation written on her face. He looked at her, then down at the floor, and then back at her face. His mouth opened again and then he just turned and walked out. Catherine stared after him, wondering what was going on inside that head of his.

Gil made his way back outside and walked along the driveway. His hands were at his side, palms parallel to the ground and he was flexing his fists, as if that held to secret to his self control. Every muscle in his body was tense but especially in his arms and shoulders. _Have to focus…have to stop this. You can't have her…have to focus on the case. But she's …god, she's so beautiful. But you're not her type anyway. Even if she weren't married, she'd never…_

"Gil, you okay?" Brass's voice startled him for the second time in just a few minutes.

Looking up at the detective, Gil answered. "Yeah, just trying to think…focus."

"Okay." Jim Brass looked at his colleague and shook his head. The guy looked lost but more than that, he looked like he was all torn up inside. 

Catherine walked out of the house and set her kit inside the SUV. Spotting the two men down the driveway, she walked toward them. "Hey Grissom….are we ready to head back to the lab?"

Gil looked up and saw her standing a few feet away, just behind Jim. He closed his eyes and concentrated all of his energy before speaking. "Ah…yeah." Turning his attention to the detective he continued to speak. "Don't release the crime scene yet. I want to go over it again after we process the body."

"Sure. See you guys later." Jim smiled. The guy had been a bundle of nerves, a basket case just a couple of minutes ago and now he was the picture of self control and discipline. He had seen it in the Marines, men falling apart one minute and the model of a perfect Marine the next. He's also seen the price those men paid for the iron clad discipline. Jim wondered if the scientist had the mental balls to pull it off daily, because it was looking like that was going to be the routine. He stood in place and watched as the two criminalists climbed into their vehicle and drove away.

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Just a little footnote onthe case: I based it on an actual murder that occurred in the city I grew up in. The husband was not part of the mob but he was a prominant businessman who was known for dirty tricks. His wife died under very mysterious cricumstances. So while a few minor facts were changed, the bones of the story are based on a real life event. 

As always, reviews are appreciated.


	9. Chapter 9

Working together, Gil and Catherine processed and analyzed the evidence. The body guards were present on the grounds when the victim was shot but didn't seem to hear or see anything. The husband was home, claiming to be sleeping when she was killed. There was no evidence suggesting that some one had entered from outside. Brass and the two CSIs all believed that the husband did it. They just could not prove it. Nothing in the evidence proved it or even really suggested that he had done it, but their instincts told them that he had. It was a frustrating case for them and one they wouldn't forget. But other cases came to their attention and they were forced to move on. 

Catherine showed up on Gil's doorstep two days later. It was the weekend and he was off., but she had worked the night before. Twilight was settling over the city and he had dozed off on his couch, reading a journal when the soft knocking at his door woke him.

He was shocked when he opened it to find her standing there; not because she was there, although that was a surprise, but because of the way she looked. She had been beaten. Bruises and red marks were all over her face, her lip was busted and bleeding and there was a small gash over her eyebrow. "Catherine!" he exclaimed as he reached for her, pulling her inside, into him.

Catherine had managed to hold herself together on the drive over, keeping her emotions in check but when he took her in his arms, she lost it. The tears began to flow and she sobbed uncontrollably. He led her to the couch to sit down and she heard him talking softly. It took a couple of tries on his part to get her to understand. He would be right back; he was going to get his first aid kit. She nodded and curled into a ball on his couch.

A few minutes later he returned, kit in hand. He sat next to her and coaxed her back into a sitting position, turning her slightly so that he could see to take care of her wounds. Carefully he cleaned the gash and butterflied it. He had also brought a warm, moist cloth to wash away the blood that had dried on her face. She winced as he worked and her pain brought tears to his eyes but he fought them back. Once he was satisfied that her cuts had been cared for, he went to the kitchen and made an ice pack. Quickly he was back beside her, holding the pack over a particularly ugly bruise that was forming under her eye. Her hand reached for it and he slid his away, letting her apply the pack with a comfortable amount of pressure. 

Settling back onto the couch, he pulled her close to him, wrapping his arms around her protectively. "Honey, what happened?"

She felt so warm, so safe with him. She didn't want to talk about it really, but he deserved an explanation. All she really wanted was to lose herself there, in him. "I came home from work late this morning," she sniffled. "Eddie…" another sniffle, "he was upset. Said I'd been out whoring around; said I was…he thought I …he thought you…Anyway, he yelled and screamed and I locked myself in the bedroom. I….I thought he was gone. Things had gotten so quiet. And I got hungry…really hungry. So I opened the door to go to the kitchen. He was still there. That's when he…" the sobs began again.

"Cath, why didn't you call me? I would have come to get you…made him understand…something."

"Understand? Understand what?" she cried. "Understand that I really was at work. That I didn't even see you last night. He wouldn't have believed you. He…he'd rather believe that I…."

"Shhh, don't. He's a fool, Cath, if he thinks you are like that. He should know you better than that."

She sat quietly for a few minutes, an occasional sob or sniffle escaping. And then she spoke so softly that Gil almost didn't hear her. "You're the only person that believes that about me. You're the only one that believes _in_ me. Why can't anybody else see me the way you do?"

"I don't understand, Cath. Maybe they are too blind. But you are not only beautiful on the outside; you are beautiful on the inside too. Eddie is a fool for not seeing that, for not cherishing that part of you."

She lifted her head and looked into his eyes. "All my life, all anybody ever sees is my body. That's all men care about, what pleasure they can get from my body. Eddie's just like the rest. Even the man that called himself my father…" a shudder ran through her as she remembered him. "The way he looked at me… why can't someone love me for who I am, not what I look like?"

Gil looked into her blue eyes and saw the hurt, far deeper than any of the hurt her face had sustained. He knew that this was the moment of truth. That he had to say it, no matter the consequences. Gathering his courage, he whispered. "I love you Catherine. I love you for what's inside; the tenacity, intelligence, and all the fire and passion for life. You are the most beautiful woman I've ever met and when I say that, I mean all of you, not just the packaging, but what's inside. Especially what's inside."

She looked at him with such intensity that he was afraid he had screwed things up. He couldn't read her stare and fear began to creep in even more. He tried to match her gaze, but he couldn't and his eyes fell. Then he heard her soft, sweet voice again. "I…the way you looked at me a couple of times, I thought you …were like all the rest. You just wanted…my body."

His eyes shot back up to hers. "No. I mean, yes…ahh, I mean, well, you are very exciting to be near….I do have those feelings about you. I'd have to be dead not to. But….I feel so much more. I know you don't feel the same…I'm kind of a nerd and all, I know. Not really your type, but that's okay. I mean, its okay if I love you isn't it? I…I understand that you are marriedl. I'm not expecting you to…even if I were your type; I still wouldn't expect….But you did ask about someone loving you for what's inside. I thought you should…know." His words lost some of their energy at the end as he realized he was babbling. He sat quietly, waiting for her to slap him and call him names. As he watched her, he realized she wasn't going to do that.

What she did do shocked him more than a slap would have. Easing her way closer to his face, she kissed him, not on the cheek like the last time, but full on the mouth. He was so shocked in fact, that he wasn't able to respond. Catherine drew back, looking at him with surprise and mischief on her face. As delicately as she could, she asked a very personal question. Most men would have taken her kiss as a green light, but he had just sat there, accepting it, but doing nothing in return. And the look of surprise on his face when she withdrew made her even more suspicious. "Gil," she said gingerly, "have you ever even been with a woman?"

More shock. Then terror. He swallowed with difficulty while he tried to rein in his emotions. "Um, why do…you ask?" His voice rose an octave as he spoke. 

"You just seem…so innocent."

Closing his eyes, his mind raced. _Damn, the kiss of death… innocent. Well, you're not the most experienced guy on the planet, but you are not a virgin either. You gotta tell her…_

"Cath, I…"

"It's okay if you are…innocent, I mean. I just don't think I've been with a virgin since I was in… ah, well…except for …well, you probably don't want to hear about that. But if you are… a virgin, I mean, that's okay. I understand that guys aren't born, well…you know what I mean…why am I babbling?" Carefully he touched her lips with his fingers to silence her. Her look of consternation amused him.

"Cath. I'm not…a virgin. I have had sex, despite what some might say. It's just…it isn't a casual thing with me, so it's not like I get a lot of practice. With my job, I rarely get past the second date, much less into bed with someone I care about." _How the hell did we end up talking about my sex life…or lack thereof?_

"Oh," was all she said before relaxing back into his arms. He pulled her closer and she shifted her head to rest over his chest. Her hand settled there too, just over his heart. The closeness of her was intoxicating for him and his heart was racing. He tried to calm it, but the more he tried the more aware he became of the effect she was having on him. 

Catherine could feel and hear his heart beating beneath her head. Now she fully understood the effect she had on this man, how hard he fought to control his emotions around her. Now she understood why he had been so distant the other night. 

She thought about Eddie. He would never be able to sit like this with her; it would always turn into a make out session, ending in his satisfaction. Why was Gil so different? He was content to just sit and hold her. He could do that, just hold her and comfort her; make her feel safe and warm. She knew he got horny around her but he didn't put his own desires first, he was looking out for what she needed. As she listened to his heartbeat she realized that she wanted what this man had to offer. She wanted to be cherished. 

Her fingers began to play on his shirt, rubbing the soft fabric as they drew circles. His heart had begun to slow down but as her fingers worked, she heard and felt it speed up again. As her circle widened, she felt a tremor go through him and knew that she was teasing him horribly. Still, he wasn't making a move on her. 

She shifted her head so that she could see his chin. Even that small motion from her had a tremendous effect on him that she saw as he swallowed hard and sighed. "Gil," she whispered.

"Hmmm?" 

"Love me."

"I do."

"Show me."

"I'm doing my best to show you, Cath. You're safe here, with me. I got this house to have a safe place for you, if you needed it."

She sat up, looking at him in awe. "You….you bought this townhouse for…me?"

"Well, I bought it for me…to live in. But I wanted a place where I thought you would feel safe. I saw when Eddie hit you before…"

"I know," she looked downward. "I hoped you didn't see but I knew …." Tears formed in her eyes as she looked back at him. "No one had ever done something like that before."

"What, Hit you? I hope not. You don't deserve to be hit. No one does."

"No…given me a safe place to be." The tenderness that she saw in his eyes made her forget to breathe. She sat, her eyes fixed on his, captivated by what she saw as he looked back at her. "Love me, Gil."

"Always Cath."

"Show me."

He broke eye contact. She saw the confusion he was feeling. "Show me, Gil…kiss me. Make love to me. Let your feelings for me out…please. I need you tonight. I need everything you have to give."

She saw the tears that sat in his eyes. She saw the decision he made and she saw the guilt he felt for what he was about to do. And she saw the love.

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Okay, I admit it; I am piggish in my desire for reviews. But it really does help me knowwhat's working,so please use the little button.


	10. Chapter 10

WARNING: THIS CHAPTER IS FOR MATURE AUDIENCES ONLY AND I MEAN MATURE!

If you aren't old enough to buy beer, you aren't old enough to read this.

If you are old enough, go find a picture of a younger Wm. Petersen for inspiration. There is one floating around with him in tight pants and no shirt. Works for me:-

Catherine had never seen such tenderness in a man's eyes before, at least not directed at her. The warmth reflected in his blue pools was overwhelming, as powerful as any caress. Slowly his hand cupped the right side of her face, away from her bruises. His thumb massaged her cheek, his eyes never leaving her face. "Are you sure about this, Cath?" He breathed the words rather than speaking them.

Afraid to break the spell, she nodded instead of answering with words. Besides, what words could express what she felt. On one of her visits to his place, she had seen his rosary beads. He was Catholic. Sleeping with another man's wife was a big transgression and she knew that he would feel the weight of this sin heavily. And there was no doubt that their relationship was about to become sinful. She measured sin by degrees; this sin is greater than that sin….Eddie had beaten her, so was it really that big of a sin to lie with another man? But for Gil, sin was sin; things were moral or immoral, black and white, no grey. He wouldn't qualify it or try to justify it. And whether or not God ever forgave him, he might not ever forgive himself. Yet he was willing to shoulder that for her because she needed him, She sat in awe of his capacity for love.

Still watching her face, he leaned in and kissed her. Careful not to hurt her hurt lip, he began gently. She felt his tremors as he allowed his feelings for her to surface. Her hands went to the back of his head, her fingers working their way into his curls, massaging and teasing as she increased the intensity of their kiss. And she felt him give in to his emotions.

For a long time they simply kissed, exploring and tasting…feeling. Her hands began to run down his back, sliding the length of his spine, rubbing, searching, seeking skin. His right hand slid behind her, also in search of skin. The seal between their lips was broken as he used his to explore her face, kissing her eyelids, feather like brushes to her cheek and below her ear and then his wonderful lips traveling down her neck to her collarbone. Her head tilted back, offering him better access. His hand was still busy behind her but gently reached up to support her head as it tilted. His other hand made its way down to her breast, covering it and then rubbing. His tongue was playing over her collarbone and then his lips began a journey down following the line into her cleavage. He stopped and looked up, his fingers circling her cloth covered but very prominent nipple. "You're sure?" He asked again.

Nodding, she whispered. "Bed."

He stood up and her eyes widened as she saw the size of his erection. Always an observer, he saw her reaction to him and noted the desire that filled her eyes. In spite of his best intentions, he was filled with a bit of male pride that a woman as obviously desirable as she was would look at him in that way, would want what he had to offer. Taking her hand, he led her to the bedroom. Standing next to the bed, he slowly began to undress her. Delighting in his response to her as the clothes slid away, she told him that now it was her turn.

Taunting him as she unbuttoned his shirt, she slid it off his shoulders and let it fall to the floor. He wasn't wearing an undershirt, so she was treated to his chest immediately. Her hands made their way around the muscles and stopped to tease his nipples. Then they slid down his sides to his waist. Her fingers worked their way inside his waistband and around to the front of his slacks. Without ever taking her eyes off of his, she unbuckled his belt, unfastened and unzipped his pants and eased them over his hips. As her hands worked their way back to nudge the slacks on down over the cheeks of his ass, her breast came into contact with his chest. His intake of air revealed just intense that was for him. His arms went around her, pulling her closer, burning skin on burning skin. His face dropped close to her ear and he whispered. "Cath…oh god…you….what you are doing to me….god….

The stubborn pants finally fell to the floor and were followed by his boxers. Stepping out of the pile, he eased her onto the bed and began his oral assault of her breasts. Her hands played over his skin, kneading and possessing, desire building. His head came to rest in her cleavage, where it stayed a moment. Then lifting himself off of her, he told her to roll over. _This is different,_ she thought as she followed his directive.

Once she was settled on her stomach, she felt his hands on her back. Gently he moved her hair aside, as he leaned over her, his lips just behind her ear. "Feel it….I love you…all of you…your body, your heart, and your soul…. he whispered, beginning a journey at her neck and workinghis way down her spine. His handsbegan the exploration as they gently traveled down her spine to the sides of her back,caressing her and making love to her with his touch.His warm breath and hot tongue created an unbelievable sensation as they joined the journey andmadetheir way down, finally concentrating an effort in the small of her back. She was writhing in pleasure, unable to control her body's reaction to him.

His journey continued as his fingers trailed over the cheeks of her ass. His teasing caused her hips to buck, her pelvis rising off the bed. He used the opportunity to slip one hand under, reaching between her legs to fondle her mound of pleasure. Again she reacted to his touch, her juices gushing from within her, into his hand. He cupped her mound, rubbing the moisture back onto her, his hand putting pressure between her folds. Gently his thumb caressed her there, spreading more wetness and driving her wild with anticipation.

Suddenly his hand slipped out and she immediately felt the loss. He turned her over and knelt over her, beginning a frontal attack on the very region he had just vacated. Realizing what he was trying to do, she put her hand over his. "No, I want you…all of you, nothing less." Glancing at his cock, she realized just how much of him there was and instinctively bucked at the thought of him inside. She saw the flames in his eyes, raw desire was etched in his face and yet there was loving gentleness in his touch. Then a cloud passed over his features and he confided. "Cath, I don't have any condoms….

"It's covered," she said. Desire and impatience mingled in her voice, giving it an imperative tone. He positioned himself over her and easing the head of his cock up to her, he entered. Once his head was in, he paused, looking at her with concern, "Okay?"

She nodded, her pelvis spreading to accept him. Gently he continued to ease himself into her, careful that he wasn't hurting her. Her hips lifted off the bed, meeting him and inviting him deeper. His hands went under, grabbing her ass and pulling her closer to him, squeezing as he did.

Once he was all the way in, he lingered, enjoying the sensation of being surrounded by her. "God Catherine…you feel so good. Ah….so damn good." She squeezed her inner muscles, tightening her body's grip on him and just about sending him over the edge. He looked at her, smiling. "You're teasing me."

She smiled back and then began to move her hips, stroking him. "Augh…" he moaned. "Stop unless you want it to be over now," he whimpered.

They teased and played, using small movements to taunt the other until he couldn't stand it any longer. He had to stroke. And stroke he did. She moved with him as his body took control and the strokes became deeper and faster until he was pounding into her, unleashing all of his pent up desire. She met him stroke for stroke grabbing and clawing at his hips, rising into euphoria and bliss. Ecstasy sounded in his voice as he moaned her name over and over, mixed with I love you until he exploded into her cavern, firing little parts of himself into her inner depths. The feel of his fire inside her sent her screaming over the edge, his name flying from her lips, her hands pulling at his curls, pulling him into her until she let out one final screaming moan as her muscles went into spasms and coated him with her own unique mixture. He was laying over her now, too weak to hold himself more than a few inches over the bed. Their bodies were still moving in unison, up and down, not wanting to let go of the glory just yet. Slowly they came to a rest and he stayed there, basking in her warmth. Neither spoke, not wanting to break the sweet serenity of the moment.

Finally he eased himself off of her, pulling her to him, her head resting on his shoulder. His fingers trailed up and down her arm, needing the continued connection, even though the fire had ebbed. His other hand came up to her face, stroking her hair and gently caressing. Small kisses on her head punctuated the caresses.

She could hear his heartbeat slowing as his body cooled. The steady rhythm was soothing to her; somehow even his heartbeat seemed to express his love for her. Her fingers played idly over his chest, wandering aimlessly.

After a few minutes, she felt his breathing deepen and heard his heart rate pick up. His caresses became more intentional, heat building in his touch. His lips sought hers and soon they were once again in the throws of love making. Once again he took the time to build her desire, caressing and touching.. loving.She watched his face as his hands made their way over her body and she saw that she was indeed cherished by this man. Her body reveled in his touch and her spirit soared as he gazed at her.

This time she rode him; and he was one hell of a bucking bronc. His thrusts from beneath nearly knocked her off a couple of times before he exploded again, a reaction to the tight squeeze her own explosion put on him.

Beside him again, she looked at him with awe. Who would have thought that the quiet, reclusive scientist was such a lover! "Gil?" she whispered.

"Hmm," he moaned lazily as his fingers aimlessly stroked her with a feathery touch.

"Where did all of that come from?"

His fingers stopped as he lifted his head to look into her eyes. His own eyes sparkled with satisfaction." You said you wanted all that I have to give…"

"So you've been carrying that around in you all these weeks?"

His gaze intensified. "That and more."

"More?" she asked in disbelief.

"Give me a few minutes and I'll show you," he taunted.

She gasped. "Promise?" She was teasing him now.

He rolled her over and kissed her. Lifting his head, he looked deep into her eyes. "Promise; all night long until you are convinced."

"Convinced?"

"That I love you…all of you."

"All night?"

"All night."

She stared at him in disbelief. But his fingers continued to graze her, gliding along her smooth silkiness. He pulled her closer to him, hugging her closely. As they cuddled, he began to whisper. "You have such a passion for life," he told her. "And when you believe something is right, you go for it without reservations. You are kind and loving and share so much of yourself. And you make me laugh. I love the way you look at things; I love looking at the world through your eyes. And smart too, don't forget smart."

"Gil?" What are you doing?"

"I'm telling you some of the reasons why I love you."

She snuggled into him, sighing with a deeper pleasure than she had ever known. "I feel it when I am here, in your arms. I feel your love. And the way it makes me feel..so happy..beyond happy. Joy, but beyond joy."

He nuzzled her ear with his lips, tasting her, cherishing her, his soul needing her. "Beauty of whatever kind, in its supreme development, invariably excites the sensitive soul to tears." He was whispering again, taunting her with the sound of his voice.

"That's beautiful."

"It's Poe."

"I excite you to tears?" Her heart felt huge in her chest as she thought about the quote.

"Everytime I see you. One look at you and I forget to breathe."

"Poe again?"

"Grissom."

"It's beautiful."

"No, you are beautiful. 'How do I love thee? Let me count the ways. I love thee to the depth and breadth and height my soul can reach."

"I recognize that one.."

"Elizabeth Barrett Browning." His breath was warm on her neck as kissed and caressed her there. "I love you with all of my heart."

"I love you too, Gil. I've never known what love is until now, I think. "

They rested in each others arms for awhile. Catherine's mind was not at rest, however. Awestruck but the depth of his feelings and her own response, she kept replaying the night in her mind, at least the part after she arrived on his doorstep. Eventually, she shifted and repositioned herself, still safe in his grasp. " Can't believe you love me," she said so quietly that she didn't think he heard.

"Believe it, Cath. And believe that you deserve it. I'm the lucky one because at least for tonight, I have you in my arms and can show you how I feel." And he proceeded to demonstrate how much he loved her again, using his eyes, hands, and mouth, his whole body to express his deepest feelings; to cherish what he loved most in the world. Finally exhausted, wet with sweat and other body fluids, and the words "I love you" on his lips, he fell asleep.

Catherine was exhausted too, but also euphoric. He did love her…his tenderness, consideration, and care for her needs and desires proved it. Who knew that such a gentle caress could spark such hot flames? But his touch did that to her. Eddie liked it rough and hard and took more pleasure than he gave. Gil gave everything he had to increase her pleasure and took pleasure in doing that. She'd never been with a man that was like that until now. As she watched him sleep, she wondered how she would face the morning. How could she leave him? She didn't want to; but there was Eddie. She was still married and she would have to go back.

Her heart constricted as she realized what she had done. This man, this beautiful man, was going to be terribly hurt and it was her fault. She had asked him to do something that he knew was wrong, act on emotions that were forbidden. And acting on his emotions had opened him to even more hurt, because he would be left alone. But truthfully, she didn't regret it. He had shown her love, real love, for the first time in her life. And knowing that she was loved like that, she would have the strength to face anything….even life with Eddie.

Okay, so I made Grissom like..you know, SuperStud or something. But you have to admit, he had a lot of pent up energy going for him, lol. Hope you enjoyed. Press the little button and let me know.


	11. Chapter 11

Gil woke to a strange sensation. He was lying on his side, his arms wrapped around something, but this morning it wasn't a pillow. It was warm and soft but not squishy like a pillow. As he breathed in, he smelled her scent and he knew; this was much better than a pillow. It was the woman of his dreams…Catherine. Slowly his eyes opened, afraid that he was delusional, that last night had just been another dream and it really was a pillow he was holding. His eyes confirmed what his other senses were telling him. It really was his dream come true. She was here, in his arms, sleeping. The smell of their love making still hung in the air, bringing a small grin to his face. 

Memories of the night flooded through him, creating a tingling sensation all over his body, but he knew that a repeat performance anytime soon was unlikely. That was okay with him because all he really wanted to do was hold her anyway, just like he was doing; hold her and love her, rejoice in the feel of her next to him. And so he did just that; he held her and watched her sleep, warm and safe in his arms, warming him with her presence. On that morning, for the first time in his life, Gil Grissom felt he was complete, a whole man because in his arms he held the part of the puzzle that had been missing. 

Eventually Catherine opened her eyes and once the fog of sleep had cleared realized where she was, the safest place she had ever known, Gil's arms. She wanted to stay there forever but knew it wasn't possible. 

"Good morning, my love." His whisper was soft, caressing her soul.

She snuggled into him, pulling his arms tighter around her. "It is…"

"Live as brave men, and if fortune is adverse, front its blows with brave hearts." 

"What was that?" she asked, surprised by the unusual early morning pillow talk.

"Cicero," he said as if it was a normal thing to quote philosophy after a night of passion.

"But…"

"Another reason I love you." She could hear his smile in his tone, even though she couldn't see his face. "You have so much courage."

"I do?" She didn't feel courageous. Most of the time she was scared of what life threw at her. Only since going to work at the lab had she felt like perhaps things would become smoother and maybe she wouldn't have to fight so hard.

They stayed like that for a few more minutes and the she began to stir. Collecting her newly found strength, she sat up. "Gil, we need to talk about this."

He scooted up also, leaning against the headboard, his hands tied together and resting on the sheet in his lap. "I know," he said, looking at his hands, wishing for some of her courage.

"I, um….well, you know I can't stay."

"I know," he whispered, the hopelessness that he was feeling quieting his voice.

"I am, well, Eddie is my husband. I have to go back."

Looking up through his eyelashes, he looked like a frightened boy. "But he hit you. Please Cath, don't go back to that. I know…" he got quiet again, "I know that I'm not… that …you don't love me. I can live with that. But…please don't go back and let him beat you again." He was pleading. 

"Gil, I know that I am hurting you. You keep your emotions so …so hidden. I knew you cared about me; I had no idea how much. I…I'm sorry for the pain that I am causing. Can you forgive me? Will you be okay?"

"I'm fine, Cath. All I've wanted since I met you was to be near you, to tell you how I feel, to hold you and be allowed to love you. I can live the rest of my life happy because for one night, I held you and loved you and you were mine. But I am concerned about you going back to Eddie. You can't let him treat you like that. You deserve to be worshipped, not…"

"I won't. I'm going to tell him…hit me again and it's over. And if he does, I'll leave." She said it with more confidence than she felt. Something about Eddie…she always went back. And then much quieter, barely audible she finished, "and I do love you."

She said it so quietly he wasn't sure if he really heard it or imagined it. Still, at the moment it didn't matter. She was going back to the jerk and he might hit her again and there was nothing Gil could do about it. Despair was seeping through his existence.

Catherine watched him sink into himself. She knew that he was terribly hurt. What she didn't realize was that he was hurting because of what might happen to her, not any feelings of loss for him. He'd deal with those later. Sad blue eyes looked up at her. "Promise me….if you need anything, help…if he hits you again….you'll tell me?"

"I promise." She reached for her clothes and began to get dressed. "I'm going to go to my sister's. I'll stay there a couple of days and let him cool down. And then he and I will talk. So, if anybody asks, you didn't see me last night or today." She looked at him pointedly.

"Okay," he shrugged. "Never saw you. I was doing my usual…reading forensic journals and feeding my bugs."

"Right." She stood and looked at him still in the bed. "Gil, I'm sorry. I made you open yourself up to this hurt. I needed to feel love, real love and you showed that to me."

His eyes brightened. "You…felt it?"

"I did. And…I wish I knew how to tell you how it makes me feel; how special it is for someone like me to be loved by someone like you…"

He got out of the bed and pulled her into a hug. "I do love you Cath. I always will. I…things will probably be a little strange for awhile. I need to have some distance or I'll go crazy. But…it doesn't mean I stopped loving you. No matter what, I'll never stop."

They kissed one last time and then she pulled away, knowing if she didn't leave now she never would. Tears streamed out of their eyes as he stood at the foot of his bed and watched a major part of his heart walk out the door. 

Catherine did as she said and stayed at her sister's. She and Eddie talked and after a week, she moved back in with him. She had to, the rent was due and he would loose the apartment otherwise. 

At work, Gil kept his distance. Luckily Cavallo was assigning Catherine to work with other CSIs. Of course, Gil's suggestion that maybe her approach to forensics was getting to be a bit one sided only working with him had nothing to do with Cavallo's decision.

"You two having a lover's spat?" Cavallo had asked when Gil made the suggestion.

Covering his face with his trademark enigmatic mask, Gil shrugged and said no. "Just want her to see how others work too."

The few times they were near each other, he wore the mask. It didn't fool Catherine one bit though. She saw the sadness in his eyes. For a few days, Gil was even angry. He hurt so much it just turned to anger, but it didn't last long. All had to do was look at her and the anger fell away. 

Brass was the only other one that seemed to notice that something was going on with the senior CSI. They had just finished an interrogation when the detective stopped Grissom in the doorway. "Hey, you okay?"

Gil looked surprised. "Yeah…we got him didn't we?"

"Yeah, I didn't mean about the case. Are _you _okay?"

Gil shrugged. "Yeah, just a rough couple of weeks is all."

Jim sized up the other man and knew instinctively that this was a matter of the heart and the man wasn't going to spill the beans. "How 'bout a drink after work?"

Gil cocked his head and smirked at his new friend. "You asking me on a date?"

"Hadn't thought of it that way but with our jobs, maybe this is the closest either of us gets."

"Okay. Your place or mine."

"I have a bottle of scotch in my desk drawer."

"Your place then." Gil walked away feeling a little better. Jim watched him and figured if the guy's heart was breaking the least he could do was provide the pain killer laced with a little bit of friendship.

Keep those cards and letters coming folks! They keep me inspired.


	12. Chapter 12

Days passed into weeks and slowly Gil found it easier to be around Catherine. They began to work cases together again, even though he still kept a distance. She felt him relaxing more around her and was happy but she missed him. Sometimes it took every ounce of her self control not to reach out to him and she saw times where she knew he felt the same, but they kept their hands to themselves. One other thing that she observed about him; every night when she came into the break room, his eyes searched, appraising her for signs of brutality. As time passed and he saw none, he began to relax about that too. They were even starting to be friends again.

Then three months after _the night_, Catherine appeared in his office. "I need to tell you something before you hear it from someplace else," she said. He looked up from his file and waited for her to continue. Taking a deep breath, she continued, "I'm pregnant."

He sat, stunned, barely able to breathe. His eyes travelled to her abdomen looking for signs of the new life inside of her. Slowly he looked up at her, not sure how to proceed.

Finally he swallowed and then asked, "How far along are you?"

"Doc says 10 weeks."

Quickly Gil did the math. "So it _is _Eddie's?"

Biting her lower lip, she nodded. _But I wish it were yours._ She saw the same thought reflected in his eyes. 

Resignation settled over him. He stood up and walked around his desk, gathering her into what he hoped was a brotherly hug. "I'm happy for you Cath. Now you'll have someone to give your heart to without reservation. And someone who will love you back the same way."

She stepped back and put her hand on his cheek. "No, now I'll have two someones."

His phone rang before he could respond. Her hand dropped as he glanced over his shoulder at it. He reached for it and then decided to ignore the ringing. But when he turned back to her, she was gone. His heart sank as he sat back in his chair, the thud of his heart's plummet sounding throughout his office. 

Gil watched Catherine everyday for the changes in her body as the baby grew. She wore pregnancy well, becoming even more beautiful and he often found himself staring in awe of her. But Gil could see sadness in her eyes the belied the happiness of her condition. And it worried him. His own life went on as usual, filled with work, journals, bug seminars, and sleep. 

They were working a case together and had just finished processing the scene. In the car, driving back to the lab Catherine was chattering, trying to punch through the remoteness that Gill seemed to be suffering that night. She was telling him about the baby shower her sister was planning when she glanced over and realized he wasn't even listening. Finishing her sentence, she became quiet. 

As he drove she looked out the window, wondering if they would ever get back some of the closeness they had shared that night. He hadn't spoken to her since then in the same tones of endearment and had been very careful to keep a gulf between them. Occasionally she had caught 'the look' from him, however. Sometimes when he thought she couldn't see, he would watch her with a contemplative expression that would morph into longing and then transform into a smile. She hadn't quite figured out what 'the look' was all about but she thought maybe it meant he was happy for her, even if it meant that he was out of the loop. 

She sighed heavily, drawing a glance from him. "Catherine?"

The concern in his voice touched her soul. He did still care. "I'm okay…just…wondering and wishing."

"About what?" His tone was more relaxed.

"I…its just that you've been so distant…"

It was his turn to sigh heavily. They had reached the CSI parking lot so he pulled into a space and cut the engine. He held his hands on the steering wheel, his knuckles turning white from the intensity of his grip. Staring out of the windshield, he seemed to be carrying on an inner debate. "I still love you, Cath; if that is what you are asking. God help me, I love you with everything that is in me." His eyes never left some distant point outside of the vehicle. His stare was constant. He swallowed and then continued. "When you told me that you are…about the baby, I hoped for a moment…"

Her hand covered his as she leaned towards him. "I did too, Gil…when I found out. I wanted so much for it to be yours. I thought it would be a way to give back, share some of the love you gave me that night. What could be more perfect than a baby conceived from that love?" Tears were trickling out of her eyes as she spoke.

Slowly he turned toward her. He lifted his hand to her face, gently wiping away her tears. "I'm sorry," he whispered.

"Sorry? For what?"

"Your tears…what I did to cause them."

"These tears aren't about that night; they are about your distance. You warned me, told me that you would be distant; but I guess I wasn't ready for the reality of it. I miss you."

Her tears and her words tore at his heart. He wanted more than anything to take her in his arms and never let go, but that would lead them down a path that she had clearly decided against; a path that would always feel wrong to him. So he did the best that he could to comfort her. "I'll try, Cath. I'll try to be a better friend." The sincerity of his words shone in his expression. He had the look of a little boy who had misbehaved and was now truly sorry. 

"We'll always be friends Gil, no matter what else. Okay? I think I'd be lost without you in my life, even if it has to be as just friends."

"Friends," he smiled. "Always." 

After the end of the shift, Gil went home to his townhouse, mixed himself a screwdriver and sat on his couch. He thought about their conversation earlier and came to a decision. The thing she needed from him the most was his friendship and he would provide it. His mind travelled over the last few months and his struggle with loving her. He catalogued each memory, cherishing each moment before carefully placing it in a hidden pigeonhole in his brain, one in the farthest reaches of his mind. After each moment had been reviewed and filed, he mentally turned a key and locked the chamber, closing off that portion of himself, so that he could concentrate on a different aspect. He would be her friend, her very best friend.

Author's Request.

When I began this story, it was sort of writing itself into being a prequel to Notes. Several of you lovely readers have suggested that I take a hard turn from canon and ignore the whole 7 years of the show. That means rethinking where I go from here. So in your reviews this time, please share your opinion. I appreciate the guidance. 


	13. Chapter 13

It was toward the end of Catherine's pregnancy that Jim Brass got involved in a high speed chase and shoot out. While firing at the driver of the other car, he accidently shot the passenger, which at first didn't seem that bad. He was a suspect after all. But when it was discovered that he'd played no part in the crimes of the driver and was just an innocent passenger, Jim's career was suddenly on the line. Problem for the higher ups was, Jim was seen as a hero by the public. He was doing something about crime in Las Vegas. Besides, his list of commendations and medals was as long as a career criminal's rap sheet and he had a reputation for being squeaky clean in the midst of corruption. They couldn't kick him out the door. So the big brass did the next best thing, they assigned him to CSI. Cavallo was being promoted to Assistant Lab Director, so Jim moved into his spot and became their boss. Gil saw the toll the whole thing took on Jim and decided it was his turn to be a friend, and so he tried. He discovered just how hard being a friend could be. Jim was much better at it, he decided. But he kept trying and made a life long friend in the process.

Catherine's baby was born at 3:36 on a Sunday afternoon. It was a girl. Gil was sure of these facts because he was there. Catherine couldn't find Eddie anywhere and had called Gil to take her to the hospital. In many ways it was the happiest, and also the saddest day of his life. But he got to hold her baby and as Lindsey's blue eyes tried to focus on his, he gave his heart away again. He didn't really understand the connection between them; he just knew he felt it. Eventually the puzzle pieces would come together for him, but for now all he knew was that she was beautiful and she was Catherine's and so he loved her too.

Gil developed a new behavior, normal for most but odd for him. He began to date….regularly. Most of his dates were with lab techs and slowly he gained a reputation around the lab. He was a great dinner date, or someone to take home to mom and dad to prove your social life didn't totally suck, and if you were lucky enough to get a second date…don't expect a third. The lab rats started a betting pool over Gil Grissom. When Catherine came back to work from her maternity leave, she found out about the pool from Missy, an assistant lab rat. The others had forgotten to warn her about not talking to Catherine about Grissom, so she approached the CSI to see if she wanted in on the bet.

"What bet?" Catherine asked.

"Well, if one of us gets him past the second date and into bed, then she wins. But if one of us gets him to admit that he is gay, then we use the money for a pity party."

"Well honey, my guess is the pool is going to keep growing for years."

"Why? I mean, he's not…well… he can…have sex, can't he?"

Catherine couldn't help it. She burst out laughing. _If she only knew._ "As far as I know, but…well, it's Grissom. It just is the way he is. He'll never go on a third date and I seriously doubt he has any leanings towards other men."

"So, you won't join the bet?"

"No, I'd have a better chance with my money at the casinos." Catherine smiled at the girl and left her standing in the hallway wondering how Catherine knew so much about the guy.

A few weeks later, she showed up on Gil's doorstep, beginning a new pattern in their relationship. He would clean up her scrapes and bruises, help her put Lindsey to sleep and then they would sit on his couch, his arms around her as she cried. The nonviolent side of Grissom would battle with his desire to take his gun and shoot the bastard, Eddie, for abusing Catherine.

On one of those occasions she looked up at him and asked, "Why do you keep doing this, Gil. Why do you keep taking care of us like this? It has to disgust you …that I keep going back?"

"I've told you, Cath. I love you."

The tenderness of his voice and in his eyes said more than even the words could say to her. "But I don't understand. How can you love me like that? How can you…keep this up?"

His hand cupped her head as he pulled her back to him. Holding her gently his soft, comforting voice answered, "so many reasons, Cath. I look at you each day and I find so many reasons."

His cryptic words reminded her of the night that they made love. He had quoted poetry to her. After a few minutes she murmured, "You used to have quotes to tell me…. Have you used up all your quotes?"

Gently he kissed her head and rested his against her as he thought.

"_Love_ in her Sunny Eyes does basking play;

_Love_ walks the pleasant Mazes of her Hair;

_Love_ does on both her Lips for ever stray;

And _sows_ and _reaps_ a thousand _kisses_ there."

"That's so beautiful, who wrote it?"

"Abraham Cowley. He was a poet in the 1600s but I'll bet you never read him when you were in school."

"Name isn't familiar. Is…is that how you see me?" she sounded timid, like she was afraid of his answer. It hurt him to see her confidence broken. "Yes, it is. When I looked at this place to buy it, imagined you sitting here on the couch, the light from the window playing in your hair. Remembering that poem brought back those feelings."

"You imagined me sitting on your couch," she asked as confusion clouded her eyes.

"I did. It was one of the things that made me decide to buy this place; I could see you here."

Catherine gazed at a spec on the wall as she absorbed what he just said. _Why is everything so messed up? Why do I even bother with Eddie? I could be here, with him all the time…. _But she knew the answer. The answer was asleep in the next room.

"I wish I had stayed that morning. I wish I had never left."

He looked at her, surprised by her confession. "Part of me wanted to tie you down and keep you here, but Eddie seemed to be what you wanted. And more than anything, I want for you to be happy, Catherine. Besides, it wouldn't have been right."

"Eddie's always been like cigarettes for me. I knew they were bad for me, I vowed to quit, and for a long time I kept on smoking."

"So why do you keep going back now?

"Lindsey. He is her father."

"And what happens when he turns his abuse on her?"

"I'll kill him. But I don't think he ever will. He seems to do better when he is around her."

"So you're going back?" She heard the disappointment in his voice.

"I have to, Gil. I hope you can understand."

"No Cath, I can't. But I love you and I'm here for you."

"You are what gives me the strength to go on. Without you, I think I would have fallen apart months ago."

"Cath please…don't go back. It will only get worse. How could it be good for Lindsey to grow up watching her father beat up her mother? What will that teach her?"

"I know" She sat for a few minutes, contemplating a change. "I'm going to tell him he has to go to rehab and get off the coke. It is the coke and other drugs that are causing this."

"And if he doesn't go to rehab?"

"Then I leave. I promise."

"It still worries me, Cath."

"I'll be fine. It'll be okay. You'll see."

Gil sat a long time without speaking, fear gripping his insides and squeezing the air out of him. He was afraid for her and afraid for his sanity if Eddie ever went too far.

PUREJOYPUREJOYPUREJOYPUREJOYPUREJOY

TPTB on this site made changes and now I can't use my little dashes to seperate things anymore:-( So I'll just write PureJoy a thousand times and maybe it will come true! Anyway, hope you enjoyed the latest installment. I read all the wonderful reviews and do so appreciate the input about where this goes. I have given it a lot of thought and have decided to...wait, wouldn't want to spoil your fun. You'll just have to keep reading and find out what I've decided to do. LOL.


	14. Chapter 14

The routine was becoming fixed for Gil and Catherine. They would see each other at work and very often work together. She spent almost as much time in his office as he did, sitting perched on his desk, her legs dangling near his chair taunting him. They ate breakfast at his place on Friday mornings; he cooked while she mixed the screwdrivers. And on Saturday, she and Lindsey would show up on his doorstep, needing shelter. That continued for a month.

It was Wednesday when Catherine spotted Gil in the hallway of the lab, walking toward the exit. "Gil," she called out.

He stopped and looked in her direction. "Hey," was all he said.

"Skipping out early? World is ending."

"Have to get to the airport." His tome was matter of fact.

"Oh…leaving town?"

"No, not this week anyway. Someone's coming for a visit, actually."

"Oh…who?"

"My mother."

"You don't seem very happy about it."

"I'm happy. It's just that…well, you'd have to know my mother to understand." He looked at his watch and then back at her. He wanted to stay and talk more or just look at her. He was always content just to look. "I'm sorry, but I'm already late…"

"Go," she smiled. He smiled back at her and then bolted out of the door.

He stood near the gate, looking for her. The flight was a few minutes late which was lucky for him. She would have no idea that he had arrived at the airport late. Finally, people began making their way out of the ramp. He watched intently for his mother. She stepped into the terminal, her brilliant blue eyes searching. They spotted each other at the same time and began walking towards one another. Briefly he hugged her and took her carry on bag. They walked to the baggage claim area in silence since she was deaf and his hands were full and he was unable to sign. For the time being, they let their eyes do the talking.

Finally, in the car she began to 'talk' to him. "I hope you have enough room for me."

He nodded. They were stopped at a light so he was able to quickly sign that he had an extra room. They arrived at his townhome a few minutes later. He carried her bags as they walked to the door. Once inside, she began to look around. He took her things to his bedroom. He would be sleeping on a couch in his study.

When he returned to his mother, he found her in the kitchen, exploring the cabinets. He knew she was looking for tea so her opened the cabinet door that hid it and showed her where all the necessary equipment was. Quietly they went about the task of making tea and once it was ready, sat down at the table to chat.

"I like your new house. It is appropriate for you," she said with her hands.

Gil knew he was rusty with his signing skills but he responded. "Thank you. I decided that I needed more space it made no sense to continue to rent."

"It's time you had a place that was your very own."

"I just wish I had known you were coming sooner. I could have scheduled time off. As it is, I'll have to work."

"I understand. I don't wish to be a burden. I will be fine."

"I know. It would be nice to be able to spend more time together though."

"Yes."

They continued talking for awhile longer. Gil could see that his mother was getting tired. "Would you like to take a nap?"

"Yes, that would be nice. Then I will fix you a delicious lunch." She smiled and the stood to walk to the bedroom. She patted his shoulder as she passed him. He watched her as she left the room, smiling after her.

He took advantage of the time to nap also. He woke up to the sound of pots and pans clattering. Realizing that his mother must be awake, he slowly made his way to the kitchen. She had a sauce bubbling in one pan and a pot of noodles boiling in another. He detected the smell of garlic coming from the oven and guessed that she was toasting some garlic bread. Now her hands were busy with a salad.

Picking up a knife, he joined in her effort. She looked up and smiled at him and he winked at her. She was tearing the greens while he chopped vegetables. Glancing at her hands, he noticed the arthritis that was settling into her knuckles. Funny that he hadn't noticed that when they were talking earlier, he thought. Glancing at his own knuckles, he wondered how long it would be until the family curse settled into his hands. He knew it was inevitable, everyone on his mother's side had arthritis and most got it early. It was only the constant use of her hands in signing that had held it at bay for so long for her.

Once the salad was finished, she pulled the bread from the oven, nodding with satisfaction at its appearance. Gil drained the noodles and then they fixed their plates, choosing to serve themselves buffet style from the kitchen. Finally, they sat at the table and conversation resumed.

She asked him about his job and were they treating him fairly. He asked about her gallery. She told him about a new artist that she had come across and he told her about a new coroner that was working at the morgue that he got along with really well. "He's amazing, Mother," Gil signed. "He had an accident at a crime scene and lost both of his legs. But he learned how to walk again and is working now. He even goes to the crime scenes. When I see him getting down next to the bodies, I am in awe. I know it has to be really awkward and must hurt, but you never hear him complain. He just treats it as a normal fact of life."

"For him, it is a normal fact of life, son. But he does sound like a courageous man. As you know, I have no patience for those who treat their challenges as excuses."

"I know, Mother. I think you would like Al. He feels the same way and lives up to it everyday."

She looked around the room again while she finished her tea. Then she looked back at her son. Staring at him with an expression he knew very well from his childhood, the expression that had told him she would not accept anything but the truth, she asked another question. "Who are you building the nest for, my son?"

Gil blinked. "Nest?"

"Yes, you have moved into a nice townhome, although a bit too masculine for my tastes, and have stocked your kitchen with all the necessary tools for domestic life. You used to eat out or have food delivered most of the time and had no need for so much kitchen equipment. There are plants near the window and your bathroom had soft, fluffy towels. Your old towels were merely serviceable. Besides, you actually have bedding that matches. Also an improvement and also more domestically minded."

She maintained a cool, even expression but inside was amused at his 'deer caught in the headlights' expression. She had suspected something when he first told her that he was buying a house. Her curiosity had been the major reason for her sudden decision to visit. Now her suspicions were confirmed. Her son was involved with someone, seriously involved, and she wanted to know the woman.

Her question was still pinballing through Gil's brain. How was he supposed to explain Catherine to his mother? _How do you explain to your mother that you are hopelessly in love with a married woman? That you spent one night in heaven and are now doomed to a lifetime in purgatory?_

She watched his face as he considered a response. _There's a problem. He is having difficulty answering. _She observed the little nuances as his face changed from surprise to fear and then relaxed. _He's thinking about her,_ she thought as she watched his eyes soften.

"There is no one, Mother."

"No one?" She glanced around at his furnishings again. "Perhaps you aren't dating her at the moment, but there is someone, Gil. As you are so fond of saying, the evidence never lies."

That night at work, he was sitting at his desk reading a file and Catherine was perched in her usual place on the desk. "Your mother all settled in?" she asked.

He looked up, refocusing from the file to her. "Yes, she is. Enough so that she made lunch today." As he thought about lunch, he remembered his mother's question. Panic rumbled through his stomach again.

"Everything okay?" Catherine asked.

"Yeah….why do you ask?"

"Your expression….like you ate something sour."

"Oh."

"You sure you are okay? There's something going on in that big brain of yours."

"I'm sure. It's just that…uh, it probably wouldn't be a very good idea if you showed up for breakfast on Friday. Her bloodhound instincts are already on overdrive and a beautiful woman on my doorstep would give her mind too much to work with."

Catherine smirked. "Give me some credit, genius. I had already decided that breakfast this week was not a good idea. How could you ever explain to your mother about us? I'm a part of _us_ and I'm not sure I understand. There's no way to explain it to anyone else."

"_Us_ is easy." He glanced across the room at his open door and then back at her. "I love you and I think you love me…that makes _us._ It is very simple."

"Until you add in everything else. Then it gets very complicated."

"The situation is complicated, true. But the way I feel about you is very clear to me… and I hope it is to you also."

"It's what I bank on every day, Gil. It is what keeps me sane." She wanted to touch him, caress his face. But she knew that one touch would lead to more and they couldn't do that, especially not here at the lab. So she kept her hands to herself and simply smiled.

His eyes returned to the file but he wasn't really concentrating. He was already regretting that they would not have breakfast together. It had become the bright spot of his weeks. Glancing back at her, "We could go to the diner or something."

"What? Now?"

"No, for breakfast."

She was tempted but knew it was a bad idea. "No, it wouldn't be the same. You have breakfast with your mother. And when she leaves, we'll have breakfast two mornings to make up for skipping Friday."

Twice in one week. He liked the way that sounded. "Okay," he shrugged before returning to his file. Catherine continued to sit and watch him, comfortable in his presence in a way that she had never felt with anyone before.

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Hope you are still enjoying!


	15. Chapter 15

Gil both enjoyed and dreaded the time spent with his mother. She had always been an intellectual equal, although her interests were more in fine arts than science. It was from her that he had gained his appreciation of literature and they often spent hours discussing books they had read or rehashing plays and playwrights. As a child, he had been drug from his insects and animals to various productions in the Los Angeles theaters so that he could sign as the actors spoke. While much of the auditory nuances were lost to her, she loved to watch the body language as the actors became their characters. The problem for Gil was that she had refined that skill to the point that she could read him like a book just by watching him move around a room. He could never hide anything from her for very long. He thought he was skillfully evading her questions about a possible woman in his life but was uneasy with the knowledge that one small mistake could bring the whole truth out. On Friday morning, he came home to the small mistake.

She had prepared breakfast and was sipping orange juice when he came in the door. After unloading his pockets and putting his kit next to the door, he secured his weapon and then joined her at the table.

"Good morning, Mother."

"Good morning," she smiled. "How were things last night?"

"Quieter than usual. It gave me a chance to catch up on my reports. I don't particularly enjoy the task but it is necessary."

"Yes, Gil you always enjoyed being outside in the elements, rather than inside, chained to a desk. I often wondered how you did so well in school since homework was your least favorite pastime."

"I made a game of it, Mother. I tried to see how obtuse or evasive I could be while still answering the question correctly. When I was in graduate school, it was a skill that helped me. It seemed that many of the professors were more interested in BS than finely honed truths."

"Yes, sadly. So many who teach are there because they can't succeed at doing. And so they look for the superficial."

"True. But there are so many who are excellent teachers and mentors. They are the ones that I remember the best…the ones who taught me to always search for the truth, no matter how difficult."

"It is a lesson your father began with you from the crib, son. He was your first teacher in that regard."

"Yes, he was. The first and the best. I still miss him, Mother."

"As do I." They sat for a moment in the cloak of a shared grief, still fresh even after so many years. Then she began a different tact. "I found something today that I wish you would explain because it has created many questions in my mind."

"Oh? What did you find?"

He saw the impish grin that briefly appeared on her face before she masked her expression and became the cool, confident woman that so often intimidated others. "This," she stated and then pulled out of her pocket a small item. Opening her hand, she revealed a pacifier, one of Lindsey's. "I found it under the bed when I was straightening it up this morning. Is there something you wish to tell me, Gil?"

Gil blinked. His mouth opened but then he closed it quickly. His eyes grew huge as he considered what she might be thinking. Finally he calmed his brain and his heart slid back down his throat into his chest and he felt like he could speak. "It belongs to a friend of mine…well, actually, my friend's baby." He swallowed, hoping she would accept the brief explanation.

"A female friend?" Her eyes were intense as she watched him; examining for any signs of duplicity.

"Yes Mother, her name is Catherine and she works with me. Her daughter is Lindsey." _Better to stick to the truth…to a point anyway. She can read a lie a mile away."_

"And she is just a friend?"

_God she can be scary when she gets like this. How am I going to keep sidestepping this?_ "We are just friends Mother. She is married and although her husband is abusive sometimes, she is determined to make the marriage work. She doesn't have many friends but she seems to trust me, so sometimes she comes here when Eddie is being rough."

He sat under the hot glare of his mother's scrutiny, feeling the heat on the back of his neck and praying he didn't start sweating and reveal just how close she was getting to the uncomfortable truth that her son was desperately in love with a married woman. After what seemed an eternity to Gil, she signed again. "She is a lucky woman to have you for a friend, Gil."

"She is a good friend to me also, Mother. She keeps me in the real world. Otherwise I'd be happily oblivious in my own cocoon." _Damn, too much information…she won't miss that one._

After another short scrutiny, she replied. "You are so much like your father, Gil. In many ways, I rejoice in the similarities, but in this I am afraid for you."

"I don't understand."

"Your father wasn't one to give himself easily to another and truly did so only once. But when he did, he gave away his whole heart…to me. Had I abused that gift, it would have crushed him. You have given your heart to this Catherine and I am afraid for you."

"Really Mother, I….I'm fine. She is my friend, nothing more."

"And yet she is everything for you. Don't think I am fooled by your answers. I see the truth in your eyes. You are in love with this woman. Please son, just be careful. As much as I worry about you in this, there are other lives that are affected too."

"I know Mother. And that is why I say that she is my friend, only my friend and nothing else. All I want is her happiness. If she is happy, then I am okay."

"Well, then…shall we have breakfast?" She didn't wait for an answer but stood and made her way to the kitchen. Gil sat in wonder. _She knows. She knows and she didn't crucify me…didn't bring out all the dogma and teachings about lust and coveting another man's wife. But then she doesn't know all of it either. Thank God!_ Relief washed through him as he relaxed, thinking that this would be the end of her questions on the subject.

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I haven't begged in awhile. So I'll stoop to begging again. Reviews please. Thank you.


	16. Chapter 16

Gil had taken his mother to lunch at the Bellagio on Saturday. They were just finishing when his phone rang. "Grissom," he answered.

"Gil," Catherine's voice cried from the other end of the line. "I'm sorry but…" She was sobbing into the phone.

"Cath? What's wrong? Are you okay?"

"No.. I, uh…he was waiting for me when I got home. I...it's bad, Gil. I…need help." A small moan travelled the airwaves from her phone to his and Gil could hear the baby crying in the background. "I'll send an ambulance and a patrol car…"

"Uh, yeah…okay." Another moan followed by more sobs.

"Cath?"

"I'm scared, Gil. He left but…"

"Okay. I'm on my way. I'll be there soon…just…oh god, Cath, just hang in there, okay?'

"I'm sorry…"

The line went dead. Gil called dispatch to send an ambulance and then decided to call Brass. "Jim, Cath called and her husband went after her again. I'm at the Bellagio. Are you any closer to her?"

"Yeah. I can be there in ten. You called a bus yet?"

"Yeah, one's on the way. Thanks Jim."

He paid the bill and tried to explain to his mother. He told her he would take her home and then go to Catherine's. "You will not," she said. "I can wait in the car while you see about your friend. Don't waste time taking me to your house."

They arrived at Catherine's and found Jim inside with the paramedics, who were working on her. Fury rose in Gil's throat when he saw her, lying on the floor looking so beaten and helpless. This was by far the worst beating Eddie had dished out. Blue eyes met blue eyes and she tried to smile when she saw him. He couldn't get close to her because of the paramedics but all he wanted to do was hold her, keep her safe in his arms. Suddenly panic filled him. "Lindsey? Where's Lindsey?" Gil asked as he looked around the room.

"Relax Gil. There's a female uniform in the bedroom with the baby."

"Catherine has a sister that looks after her when Catherine's at work. Maybe she can come get the baby," Gil offered. His eyes were back on Catherine, watching intently.

"Yeah, we're trying to contact her."

"We're ready to roll," said one of the paramedics.

"Okay, we'll follow," Jim told the medic.

Just then the female officer walked into the room with Lindsey. "What do I do with her?"

Brass shrugged, unsure what to do. Gil knew Catherine would hate it if Lindsey ended up with strangers. "You have any kind of car seat in your trunk?"

The officer shook her head negatively. One of the paramedic's overheard. "She can ride with us. We have the means to keep her safe. But when we get to the hospital, one of you will have to take her. We can't deal with her and her mother."

"Yeah. Thanks." Gil walked with the officer to the ambulance, where the medic took the baby. "Which hospital?" Gil asked.

"Desert Palm," answered the driver.

Gil looked at Jim. "You coming?"

Jim clenched his jaw and scowled. "I'll be there later. I'll wait her for Eddie. I want to have a little chat with him." Jim's expression told Gil how the chat would go.

"Okay. I would like a little chat with him myself…"

"You go with her. This is more my line anyway. Catherine needs you."

He hustled back to the car and followed the ambulance to the hospital. His mother sat quietly, watching him intently. Once they arrived, she followed him inside. She found a comfortable chair in the waiting room while Gil charged through the door to the examining area and headed back to the ambulance bay. There he took Lindsey from the paramedic. The baby was crying but seemed to calm some when familiar hands took her. Gil held her to him, rubbing her back like Catherine had taught him, whispering soothing sounds to settle her. He watched as they wheeled Catherine into an exam room. A nurse approached him. "Sir, you really need to take the baby into the waiting area. She doesn't belong back here."

"But, that's her mother. And I need to know…"

"Yes, we'll call you as soon as the doctor has a chance to look at her. You can help her best now by taking care of the baby."

Gil nodded, understanding the sense of what the nurse was saying. But he still didn't want to leave Catherine. Slowly he walked back to the door, glancing back at the exam room several times. He spotted his mother on the other side of the door, sitting in a chair by the window. Sitting beside her, he still held Lindsey against him.

After a few minutes, he sensed that Lindsey had fallen asleep. Carefully he shifted her to cradle her in the crook of his arm; something else Catherine had taught him. His mother smiled at his gentleness with the baby. He had never shown the slightest interest in human babies and yet he was handling this one with reverence. Leaning over, she wanted to see the baby's face. Gil heard a small gasp that escaped her. His eyebrow shot up as he glanced over at his mother. She looked stunned.

Knowing that she could read lips and not having free hands to sign with, he spoke. "She is a pretty baby, isn't she?"

Worried blue eyes gazed steadily at him. "Yes, she is. Beautiful, in fact. Her mother must be beautiful?"

Gil looked at his mother. _What is she really asking me? I know she is fishing, but for what?_ "Yes, she is."

Lindsey began to stir, her eyes slowly opening. Gil's mother smiled at the small face as the baby's eyes focused on Gil. The two sat looking at one another, captivated. Finally she broke the trance between Gil and Lindsey by telling Gil to let her hold the child while he went to find a bottle for her. "And perhaps a diaper?"

Gil gently handed Lindsey over to his mother and headed to the desk to inquire where he might procure the needed items. Meanwhile Lindsey captivated Mrs. Grissom with her blue eyes and bubbly smile. The elder smiled and cooed as the baby gurgled and wiggled in her arms. Finally, the two sat, gazing at one another for several minutes. Just as Gil returned with a bottle and a small package of diapers and wipes, the nurse called him to come to the exam room. He asked his mother if she would be okay with the baby and when she replied that she knew how to take care of a baby, he followed the nurse.

Catherine was lying on the gurney, her face had been cleaned and ice was being applied to her bruises. When she saw Gil without Lindsey, she began to panic. "It's okay, honey. She is with my mother. She's fine. They are in the waiting room."

"She's okay? He didn't…"

"She's fine. And she's being doted over and spoiled as we speak." Gil tried to smile.

"What about you?"

"I…I'll be okay. They said…I'm waiting for an orthopedist. He broke my arm Gil. Eddie broke my arm. This is the last time, I promise. I'm leaving him. I'm getting a lawyer as soon as I get out of here."

"I'm glad to hear that."

"I remember Jim being at my house…how did he get there?"

"I called him. He was closer than I was and I wanted help to get to you ASAP."

"Where is he now?"

"Waiting to have a little conversation with Eddie."

"Gil, don't let him. I don't want him to get into trouble over Eddie."

"Jim knows what he is doing. And from the expression on his face when I left the house, there's no way to stop him. If there hadn't been Lindsey to take care of, I'd be there with him."

"No Gil. No. Don't let Eddie's violence poison you. Call Jim and tell him the same thing. That I said no."

"Okay. I'll be back in a few minutes."

Gil walked outside and made the call to Jim. "Catherine doesn't want you to do anything to Eddie, Jim."

"I know but the SOB …"

"She means it, Jim. Don't touch the guy."

"Will she press charges if I bring him in?"

"We didn't talk about it but I think she will."

"Okay, so I'll bring him in. And if he happens to fall down along the way…well, he shouldn't be so clumsy."

"Jim," Gil said with a warning tone.

"Yeah, I hear you. But I'd like to pound the guy into the carpet."

"Me too. But it's not what Catherine wants."

"Okay, Okay."

The phone went dead and Gil stood on the sidewalk for a minute, reining in his anger and contempt for a man he had never met. _What kind of coward beats a woman, any woman…but especially his wife? _He wondered.

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	17. Chapter 17

Everyone was so good about posting reviews that you get a reward! I worked especially hard on getting this chapter ready to post quickly. I hope you like it!

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Gil went in to check on his mother and the baby. Satisfied that everything was alright there, he went back to Catherine. "Jim says he'll bring Eddie if you'll press charges."

"Damn right, I will."

Gil was glad to see some fight back in her. "Okay then." He stood, holding her hand and gazing at her with a tender expression.

"Not that I am complaining, but what's the look about?"

"Look? Oh…I'm just so relieved, I suppose. It scared me when you called."

"I'm sorry. And now your mother is in the middle of it."

"It's okay. I think she had already guessed about my feelings for you anyway."

Just then the nurse walked in with Mrs. Grissom and Lindsey behind her. " I found someone who wants to see you," said the nurse.

Catherine reached for Lindsey but cried out in pain when she moved her arm. The nurse helped her reposition it as Gil took Lindsey from his mother. He held Lindsey close to Catherine so that she could look at her daughter and see that she was safe. Catherine smiled as her daughter's big blue eyes focused on her and a small smile and gurgle erupted from the baby.

"Mother, this is Lindsey's mother, Catherine."

Apprehension filled Catherine as she was introduced to Mrs. Grissom. But as she looked into the older woman's warm blue eyes, her nervousness fell away. She saw acceptance.

Catherine watched, intrigued as Gil's mother signed. Looking at Gil for understanding, he translated. "Mother said that I was correct. You are very beautiful."

"You told her about me? And why didn't you tell me that she is deaf?"

"She followed the evidence. And the subject never came up."

Gil's mother watched the exchange between the two, assessing their expressions, especially Gil's. Yes, this was the woman who held his heart. The elder Grissom was confident about that. She knew the tender look that he gave to Catherine; his father had looked at her that way so many years before.

Wanting to know this woman better, she began to sign. "Gil tells me that you are married?"

Catherine listened to Gil's voice as she watched the mother's hands. "Yes," she replied. "But not for much longer." Fascinated, she watched Gil sign to his mother.

"And he says you work together?"

"Yes…well, more like I follow him around and learn. He is very good at what he does and a wonderful teacher."

"Yes, he gets that from his father, as well as his deductive mind. It came naturally to him. I had to teach him to think intuitively through art and literature. I am not certain that he has mastered that skill even now."

Catherine briefly surveyed the subject of the conversation and then turned to the elder woman. "Oh, I think he is very good … at everything he does." Her double meaning wasn't lost on Gil. He silently sent out a prayer that his mother didn't get it.

The two women smiled at each other as Gil looked thoroughly embarrassed. "Okay ladies, enough of this. Please find another topic…besides me."

The women laughed and then his mother grew solemn again. "I am sorry this has happened to you. But I am glad that my son is able to help. I would like to help also, if I may."

Gil finished the sentence and then simply stared at his mother. _She's not normally so accepting. Any other woman I ever showed interest in always got the third degree and her royal disapproval. But she immediately accepted Catherine…_

Catherine saw her sincerity and also saw the strange expression on Gil's face. She wondered what he was thinking. Looking at his mother, Catherine began to speak again. "Thank you. Gil said you've been taking care of Lindsey in the waiting room. That has already been a help…and a relief."

"For me it has been a pleasure. I was happy to have the opportunity to hold my …" Gil stopped talking but his mother's hands kept signing.

"Gil?" Catherine asked.

He turned to Catherine looking shocked. His eyes were wide and his mouth was opened slightly as if caught in mid sentence, which he had been. He looked dazed.

"Gil?" she asked again. "Finish what your mother was saying."

Gil looked back at his mother who smiled patiently at him and then back at Catherine. "She...um…" he swallowed. "She said….she was happy to have the opportunity to…" His voice was getting quieter until the last part was almost a whisper. "…to hold her only grandchild."

Catherine was stunned now too. "She said what?"

Gil looked back at his mother and signed to her. She smiled and signed back. Catherine tried to follow what was happening between the two but had no inkling except that his mother was smiling and nodding. Gil still looked bewildered.

Low on patience, Catherine called his name. "Gil?"

She says that Lindsey has my eyes and looks a lot like me when I was a baby…only prettier. And she…" Gil glanced back at his mother and then took a deep breath. "She says that watching the two of us together, that this child was obviously conceived in love."

"She's not mad because I am married. I mean, she must think I am a horrible person to sleep with you when I am married to Eddie."

Following the conversation using her lip reading skills, the elder Grissom put a hand on her son's arm. He turned to her and she gently pulled him away from the bed so that she could step closer. Gingerly she bent over Catherine, planting a small but meaningful kiss on her forehead. Standing straight again, she began to sign. "I see in your eyes the love you have for my son. It is every mother's wish that her child could be loved so. Your circumstances at the moment are horrible, but you, my dear, must be a lovely person to have so completely captured Gil's heart. I want to know you better but for now, we must all concentrate on your healing."

She turned to Gil, lifting Lindsey from his arms and nodding. Then she left an amazed couple staring in confusion as she exited the room.

Gil stood, frozen to his spot, his mouth slightly agape as he tried to process what had just happened. _No lecture about coveting or threats about burning in hell…. And she seems to like Catherine. She's never liked anyone I dated. Hell, she even kissed Catherine. She never kisses anybody! _And then the reality of her words hit him_. And she says Lindsey is my child. _He turned back to Catherine, gazing at her._ If Lindsey is mine, then Mother is right about another thing too. Lindsey was most definitely conceived in love. _

Catherine's mind was in overdrive also. _Lindsey is Gil's baby? Oh, I hope it is true. I wanted her to be his child from the moment I suspected that I was pregnant. Oh God, please let it be true. And please, let him be happy about it._

She watched him as his brain was sorting out the visit from his mother. _He looks so confused. Oh dear god, please don't let him be confused about me…or Lindsey."_

Finally Gil began to emerge from his fog and turned his eyes back to Catherine. She perceived shyness in his expression and a little bit of awe. "Could it be true?" he asked.

"You know it could. I could have miscounted days or the doctor could have miscalculated. We thought Lindsey came a couple of weeks early, maybe she was right on time." Gil had a strange look on his face, one that Catherine couldn't quite discern, but she thought it was a happy look. "Please Gil. Tell me what you are thinking."

He blinked and gazed into her eyes. "I am thinking how much I love you and if it is true, what a beautiful gift you have given me."

A few tears escaped her eyes as she looked back at him. "Funny, I was just thinking the same thing about you," she smiled.

The nurse came in, breaking the spell of the moment. "Okay, we're taking you over to the orthopedic room to take care of that arm. After that, I'm pretty sure we're going to kick you out of here. Is there someone who can look out for you tonight?"

Gil smiled at Catherine. "She's going home with me. I'll take care of her."

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	18. Chapter 18

Catherine's sister, Nancy arrived while Catherine's arm was being set. She and Gil had never met but were aware of one another. When he saw her standing in the ER hallway, he knew that she had to be Catherine's sister and so he approached her. "Nancy?"

"Yes. I'm looking for my sister."

"I'm Gil Grissom. Catherine is in the orthopedic room. Eddie broke her arm and they are setting it now. After they are finished, she will be released."

"Where's Lindsey?"

"My mother is caring for her in the waiting area. Nancy, he really hurt her this time."

"That bastard. I've been trying to get her to leave him for a long time. Almost had her convinced and then she got pregnant."

Gil studied the woman. She was younger than Catherine by a few years and her hair was more blonde. They had the same eyes, however. _Should I tell her that Lindsey might not even be Eddie's? No, I'll leave that to Cath. _"I was thinking that she could stay with us when they release her."

"Oh, we have plenty of room at my house. I can help her with Lindsey and take care of Catherine too."

"Oh…yeah. She will need help. But what if Eddie shows up?"

"He wouldn't dare. The last time he beat up Catherine, my husband threatened to kill him, especially if he came around our house. Jerry meant what he said and Eddie believed him."

Gil was disappointed that Catherine wouldn't be coming home with him, but he knew that Nancy would be more help. Besides, Gil wasn't quite sure he was ready for Catherine and his mother to be spending so much time together. "I'm going to give you a couple of phone numbers," he said as he pulled out one of his cards. "This is my mobile number and I am also giving you the number of our supervisor, Jim Brass. He is at Catherine's now, waiting to arrest Eddie when he goes back. If Eddie does show up, call us, either of us and we'll be there."

She took the card from him and nodded. Then looking at him a little more closely she exclaimed, "you're the guy!"

Gil was taken aback by her little outburst. "Excuse me?"

"You're the guy she was telling me about…from work. The one that has been teaching her so much. She talks about you all the time. She says you see her for who she really is and not just as a pretty face and sexy body."

"I…um…well, she is very intelligent."

Nancy chuckled. "You are probably the only guy who has called her that. I always thought she was smart…sometimes too smart for her own good, if you know what I mean. But…guys never notice that about her. You made an impression on her."

_I did more than that,_ Gil thought smugly. "She is very …special to me." He chose his words carefully to let her know that he did feel something for her sister but wanted to leave it to Catherine to tell the whole story.

Just then Jim Brass walked into the hallway. "How is she?"

"Getting her arm set," Gil replied. "They cleaned up the cuts and bruises. After the orthopedics people finish, she'll be released to go home."

"She's not going back to her house, is she?"

Nancy chose that opportunity to speak. "No, she is coming home with me."

"Oh, I'm sorry," Gil said. "Nancy, this Jim Brass, Catherine's supervisor and friend. Jim, this is Cath's sister, Nancy."

The two nodded at each other. "We waited until Eddie showed up. Mitch, Officer Mitchell," he said to Nancy, "has him at booking."

"Will he be in jail long?" Nancy asked.

"He'll be arraigned in a few hours and then bail will be set. If he can make bail, he'll be out sometime later tonight." Jim looked angry at the prospect.

"Well, that will give us time to get Catherine settled and run by her place to get what she and Lindsey need. Thank you."

"Hey, Catherine is one of my people. Husband or not, nobody gets away with hurting my guys. Besides, I hate bastards that beat their wives."

Nancy turned to Gil. "You said your mother has Lindsey?"

"Yes, I'll show you where they are."

Jim watched the two walk away. He hadn't had a chance to tell Gil that Eddie probably wouldn't be feeling like causing trouble for a day or two. The dumb ass had actually tried to resist arrest, giving Mitch and him the perfect opportunity for a little payback. The guy's head was going to be very sore for a few days, not to mention his gut. An evil grin flashed across his face as he remembered the sound of Mitch's nightstick coming into contact with Eddie's abdomen. Even better was his memory of the way the thud felt to Jim as he wielded the stick. "Dumb ass," he muttered to himself as he walked off in the direction of the waiting room.

Gil introduced Nancy to his mother and then explained that Catherine and Lindsey would go home with her. Carefully Nancy took Lindsey from her grandmother, holding her close.

Brass walked up and Gil introduced him to his mother also. "This is my supervisor and friend, Jim Brass," he explained to her.

Gil was somewhat surprised by the sudden transformation that his friend underwent. Gone was the sarcastic cop; he had been replaced with a very polite and charming man that Gil didn't know existed. For the second time in just a few minutes, Gil found himself confused and off balance. He had seen Jim turn on the charm for the Sheriff or the media, but he had never seen his friend this charismatic before.

Watching his mother as Jim spoke with her, Gil was fascinated. She usually saw through pretenses, but was totally captivated by Jim. He sat next to her and chatted for a few minutes, as Gil interpreted. By the time the conversation ended, Gil's mother was inviting Jim over for Sunday dinner and telling him how fortunate her son was to have him as a friend. "I'm the fortunate one, Mrs. Grissom," Jim assured her. "Gil has seen me through a difficult time. I couldn't ask for a better friend."

Eventually the nurse wheeled Catherine out in a wheelchair. Nancy greeted her sister and explained the arrangements. Catherine shot Gil a questioning look, which he answered with a smile. "Nancy has more room for you and Lindsey and she will be there to help you."

He saw the disappointment on her face. "Yeah, it is probably the best," she said. "But I need to get some things from my house." Looking Jim she asked, "did you arrest him?"

"Yeah, Mitch took him to booking. But if he makes bail, he'll probably be out tonight. So get everything you think you will need. Don't go back to the house without Gil or me there. Understand?"

Catherine nodded. "I'm getting a divorce as quickly as possible. This was the absolute last straw for me. He'll get no more chances."

"Well, once he goes to trial," Jim continued, "he'll be sure to get some jail time but probably not more than a few months, depending on the judge. Hopefully, you'll be free of him by the time his sentence is up."

"As far as I am concerned, I am free of him now."

Nancy left Lindsey with Gil and went to get her car. Jim leaned over and hugged Catherine. "I'll see you soon, okay?"

"Thanks Jim. Oh, and did you do what I asked…you know, what Gil called about?"

"I tried, Catherine. But he resisted arrest. Honestly, he did. Mitch and I had to restrain him. He took a couple of knocks to the head and a stiff one to the gut. Sadly, he'll live."

Catherine looked chagrined. "I'm not sure whether to thank you or not." A small grin suddenly played at the corners of her mouth. "Did you make it count?"

"Oh, yeah…it was very satisfying." He winked and then left.

Nancy was at the door, waiting for Gil to bring Catherine and Lindsey to the car. Gil handed Lindsey to his mother and she carried the baby ahead of Gil and Catherine. As they approached the car, Gil leaned down and whispered in her ear. "Call me after you are settled. I want to tell you once more today how very much I love you."

Catherine glanced up at him. Tears were pooling in her eyes. "And I want to hear it," she said as he helped her into the car.

Gil and his mother stood and watched as the car pulled away from the curb and headed out of the parking lot. Once it was out of sight, his mother signed to him, "Take me home, son. You have some explaining to do."

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Oh dear, seems Grissom is in trouble with his mother. How's he going to splain everything? Hmmm, guess you'll just have to keep reading to find out, which means I need to keep writing. And we all know what keeps me inspired, lol. Need I say it...reviews!


	19. Chapter 19

Back at his townhouse, Gil fixed afternoon tea. Sitting at the table sipping the tea, he waited for her assault. He didn't have to wait long.

"Gil, I am worried about this situation."

Gil looked at his mother, trying to appear composed and expressionless. She could read him too well however, and scowled at his demeanor. "Don't look at me like that, son. I am not impressed. How did you let yourself get so involved with a married woman?"

Swallowing was difficult for Gil as he sat under her gaze. He felt like a little boy again, sitting at his mother's kitchen table and accepting her ruling on his latest gaffe. This one was bigger than anything he had done as a boy, however…at least in her eyes. For Gil, becoming involved with Catherine was the best thing that ever happened to him, especially since she was planning to ditch Eddie and since it seemed Lindsey was his child. He knew it was complicated, but he was confident that they could make it work. However, sitting at the table under his mother's scrutiny, Gil's confidence began to waver.

"Mother…I…she… we…it…" He dropped his hands to the table in frustration, unable to form a coherent thought, let alone speak it through his hands. Sighing deeply, he tried again. Looking at her with what he knew was a silly grin he signed, "I simply could not help myself, Mother." He saw that she was 'listening' and continued. "From the moment I met her I was captivated. I tried not to let my feelings grow, tried to contain them, kept my distance, but nothing worked. I fell for her and kept falling. I have never felt this way about anyone else, Mother. Not even close to this. Slowly, she became the center of my dreams and most of my waking moments too. And then one night Eddie beat her up and she came here. She had no place else to go. She was so hurt, so broken and she was in such despair. All I knew to do was love her, show her how much I loved her…and so I did. I haven't touched her since that night. She chose to go back to him, wanted to make her marriage work, especially after she found out that she was pregnant. All I wanted was for her to be happy. It is still what I want for her. I love her, Mother. I can't…I won't deny it any longer."

"But Gil…it was a sin…to do what you did."

"All I did was love her, Mother. If loving her is a sin then I am an unrepentant sinner, because I love her with my entire being…it is as natural to me as breathing. I simply cannot stop."

"You did more than love her, you acted on that love and created another life."

"Yes, I acted on that love…I gave her what she seemed to need. And if Lindsey is my child," he hesitated; wanting to be sure he said exactly what he felt. "If Lindsey is my child, then I can feel nothing but joy. She is the perfect consequence of our love."

The elder Grissom studied her son's expression thoughtfully. "Tell me, why do you love her so much that you would risk your soul?"

"So many reasons, Mother." He shot back at her.

"None of your cryptic answers, Gil. Honestly…answer me honestly and straightforwardly."

"Because she completes me, Mother. Without her, my soul will be lost anyway. When she smiles at me, or even just looks in my direction, it is if the sun has suddenly burst out from behind a cloud. And she is so intelligent…about people too, which is something I don't do well. She is beautiful but what shows on the outside is only a fraction of the beauty that lies within her. And she makes me happy. When I am not with her, it is as if a part of me is missing." He saw her expression change, sadden. "Mother?"

"I understand. There is a part of me that has been missing since your father died. At times I still ache just to feel him near me."

Gil broke one of her unwritten rules, he touched her. Automatically his hand went to her arm in hopes of offering consolation. She looked started by his gesture but acceptance quickly overrode all other emotions. Usually she would only exchange hugs or small touches as a way of greeting or at a parting, rarely in normal conversation. But his hand on her arm was the closest she could get to the feel of her long dead husband and for a moment, she relished it.

"Mother, I don't understand. At the hospital you seemed so accepting?"

"I accepted the situation; it is true, and I did mean what I said that I wish to know her better. And I am glad that we have had this conversation. I know it seemed judgmental on my part, but I had to know."

"Know what, Mother?"

"The extent of your feelings. I can only hope that she returns them. Gil, please go carefully with this. Let her fully disengage from her husband before you step in. Let her be completely finished with him before you commit to her. Promise me that, please. It is all that I ask."

"I understand. And that is my intention, for several reasons. Most importantly, it will be easier for her to obtain the divorce if there are no complications…like me."

She smiled at him warmly and then told him to remain seated. She disappeared from the table and the room but came back within a few minutes. "Now that I am satisfied that she is indeed the one for you, I have something that I thought might be appropriate." She handed him a small box.

He took the box from her and carefully opened it. Smiling, he looked at his mother. "It is Grandmother's ring. I haven't seen it in…years."

"Yes. I know you were very angry with me when I made you get it back from Nicole. But I knew she was just a passing fancy and that one day there would be someone to whom it should belong. After today, I know who that someone is. Once she is free of this Eddie person, give her the ring, Gil. And with the ring go my blessings and also your father's, because I know in my heart that he would approve of your choice."

Her unwritten rule was completely lost in the hug that he gave her. He held her tightly and then backed away to sign. "Thank you," was all he could manage to say.

"Now son, take me shopping. I want to spoil my grandchild."

They went to every baby shop that he could think of. He asked her to help him select necessary items for the baby that he would keep at this place; a crib, changing table, and dresser were the first purchases. Quickly he was rethinking his study and in his mind it was becoming a nursery. His mother insisted on buying the bedding, several blankets and baby towels, a baby bathtub, and a rocking chair.

"How will you decorate the room?" she asked him. They looked at several décor choices but it was she who spotted the perfect match. There was a wall paper border with matching decals that was filled with butterflies. The pastels matched the other items they had purchased and she smiled at him as she showed it to him. He was as intrigued by her excitement as he was with his own feelings. As they had explored the various shops and he had discovered the world of babies, he found himself more and more excited about being a father but still feeling very much an outsider. As he looked at the butterfly décor, he realized that he did have things he could share with her, starting with butterflies. They explored more and found a butterfly nightlight, a butterfly lamp, and a butterfly pillow. In the toy section, they found a stuffed butterfly. "Do you think it is too much?" he asked his mother.

"I think it is wonderful," she signed. "You can choose one of the colors to paint the walls and put up the border. Then cover one wall with the decals to make to look like they are flying. You have so many beautifully displayed butterflies…we will pick some to add to the other walls. Bright colored ones will do best, I think; they will contrast with the pastels." Gil trusted his mother's instincts. She was after all, an art dealer and had a good eye for color.

They spent the next few days preparing the room. She seemed to delight in the planning and in supervising his work. He felt joy as he made a place for his daughter, and the certainty that she was his daughter grew within him more and more each day. Gil had always been a loner and suddenly having this little person. who was a part of him, in his life made him realize just how alone he had been.

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I think this arrangement is working rather nicely.I write, you review, and I write even more. Is it working for you?


	20. Chapter 20

Gil visited Catherine and Lindsey at Nancy's everyday, but the experience was totally unsatisfying in his view and he sensed that Catherine felt the same. Her bruises and cuts were healing and the swelling in her arm was almost gone. He could tell that each day she was getting better. At the end of the week, they left Lindsey with Nancy and he drove her to meet with an attorney.

"Yes Mrs. Willows, under the circumstances a divorce should be very simple. You hold all the assets of your marriage in your name. He has bee arrested and is waiting for trial on assault charges, if I understand it correctly. This should be an automatic. It will simply be a matter of scheduling a court date and making an appearance before the judge. But I must ask who the man that came with you is?"

Gil had brought her in and was waiting in the outer office. They had debated how involved he would be and how much to tell the attorney. Keep things as simple as possible was what they had decided. Remembering their discussion, Catherine told the truth…just not all of it. "His name is Gil Grissom. He is my mentor at work and my friend. He and my supervisor, Jim Brass, have been there for me ever since Eddie beat me up the last time. It was Jim that had Eddie arrested. I'm staying with my sister, but Gil checks on me and has been a big help. I don't what would have happened to me if not for my friends and my family."

The lawyer nodded, satisfied with her answer and asked a few other questions. "Custody will not be an issue since he will most likely be in jail," the lawyer commented. "Of course, he might push the issue when he gets out." Once the interview was finished, he walked her to the outer office. "I should be able to get a court date soon. Since this is an easy one, the judge can squeeze it between some of his bigger cases."

"Thank you," Catherine said. "I'll wait to hear from you." She and Gil left, with him being very careful not to touch her until they were safely away. Once in the car however, he pulled her into a hug. "You okay?" he asked.

"Yeah. He says it shouldn't be difficult. He brought up custody…"

"I've given it some thought. After the divorce is final, we can do a paternity test and establish that I am her father. Then we'll get the birth certificate reissued with my name. Eddie will never come near her again."

Catherine watched him as he spoke. He was so sure that Lindsey was his but she still wondered. It worried her that the baby could be Eddie's. _Gil is so sure…it will hurt him so much if it turns out to not be true. God I hope she is his…for so many reasons._

"There's something I want to show you," he grinned.

_He looks so excited, like a little boy with a secret that he can't wait to tell… _"A surprise? I love surprises."

"I think you will like this one. I thought we could pick up Lindsey and go over to my place. Mother was hoping to visit with you some more before she leaves and that's where the surprise is anyway."

Catherine smiled at him. "That would be nice. It'll be good to see a different set of walls for awhile. And I would like to visit with your mother too. I wish I knew sign language."

"I can teach you and the next time she visits, you girls can have a private chat."

"Oh, that could be fun." She giggled as she watched him absorb the possible consequences of a private talk between his mother and his…_what am I exactly? _The thought spun in her head all the way back to Nancy's. _What are we to each other, really? _

_This could be getting too complicated for him; he might just bow out._

They went by Nancy's and picked up Lindsey. Among Gil's purchases was a car seat. While Catherine ran inside to get her daughter, he took the seat out of his trunk and installed it. Finally they were headed for his place.

Catherine noticed that he kept glancing in his rear view mirror. "Everything okay?" She was wondering what he kept looking at.

He glanced across at her and smiled. "Everything is great. I just can't get used to the little bundle in the back."

Catherine smiled at him. _He's so absolutely silly about this. I would have never guessed that he would be so taken with fatherhood. I wonder where we'll go from here. He mentioned everything about Lindsey but said nothing about us. I thought he…no, no…don't go there. Don't get your hopes up…_

Once they were at his place, he helped Catherine out of the car and then lifted Lindsey from her car seat. They walked inside. His mother was sitting in a chair next to the window, reading. She looked up when they walked in and a smile burst out on her face. She walked over to Gil and took Lindsey from him. Catherine smiled as she saw the look of surprise and disappointment on his face. Clearly he hadn't expected his mother to claim the baby and leave him with empty arms.

Shyly he looked at her and smiled. _I wish I could hold her,_ he thought. _If only Mother…but I don't dare. Not yet, not in front of Mother. _"Come let me you show you my surprise," he said. He felt brave enough to take her hand and lead her to his former study.

Catherine stood in awe in the middle of the room. "You…you did this for Lindsey?"

He watched her as she took in the surroundings. Her eyes glanced around at the butterflies, the paper ones and the real ones. And then she saw the stuffed butterfly in the crib. Turning to him, she laughed. "This is so… you," she teased. "And it is beautiful. I know Lindsey will love it when she comes to her Daddy's house."

He was smiling but suddenly grew serious as she finished. Stepping closer to her, his hand went to her cheek, his thumb tracing the line of her cheekbone. He looked intent as he spoke to her. "It's our house, Cath. I got it for you, remember? Once things are settled with Eddie, I want this to be your home…yours and Lindsey's."

"And yours? Where will your home be?"

She watched, her mind suspended as she saw his face closing in on hers. His lips brushed hers and then he pulled her close to him, his arms surrounding her. Finally he was holding her; she was where she had wanted to be. He whispered, his mouth next to her ear. "Wherever you and Lindsey are…that's my home."

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Thanks for all of yur reviews! I love all the comments and suggestions. What I am getting is that you want more drama but in the end we all want the same thing--PureJoy! Can you hear us CSITPTB? Billy and Marg are both making noises about leaving. When they do it should be because Gil and Catherine ride off into the sunset together...TOGETHER! But enough of my ranting. On to more writing.


	21. Chapter 21

They were still holding one another when Gil's mother walked in holding Lindsey. Seeing him with Catherine convinced her again that whatever the complications might be, this was the woman he belonged with. When his father died, Gil had closed a part of himself away from the rest of the world. He built walls around his feelings, barely letting himself feel at all and no one had been able to get past the barriers. He had dated, even bringing a few girls home to meet her. But she had never approved of any of them because while those girls had appealed to him in some way, they not touched him, his inner self. But this one…she was different. With this one Gil would open himself to love. He had said it in their little talk; he simply couldn't help it. With this one, Gil could find happiness.

Besides, there was the little one. The usually reserved, often stoic Mrs. Grissom absolutely adored her granddaughter. It felt good to hold a baby again, especially Gil's baby. She had wanted a house full of children but nature had thought differently and she had been forced to accept the fact that Gil would be an only child. She had recognized that he was a loner and probably would never marry; never have children… never give her grandchildren. As she looked at Catherine, she realized what a gift this woman was to her as well as Gil. Catherine had made the dream of grandchildren a reality.

She approached the pair and handed Lindsey to Gil. Catherine looked surprised, expecting to hold her baby. Instead, she found herself holding Gil's mother as the older woman gathered her into a warm hug. She broke the hug and turned to her son, patting him on the cheek, and then patted Lindsey's back. She turned back to Catherine and planted a gentle kiss on her cheek. Her hands spoke briefly as she signed "thank you" to Catherine and then disappeared from the room, leaving the little family together in the nursery.

Gil watched his mother, amazed. After she left he looked at a stunned Catherine. "She never hugs or kisses anybody," he said dazed.

"I …uh…what was she thanking me for?"

"I'm not sure exactly; Lindsey…loving me, maybe?"

"Gil…" Catherine backed away from him, looking confused and unsure.

"Catherine?" His voice was quiet, gentle. He stepped in her direction but stopped when he saw that she was suddenly nervous.

"This…" she looked around the room, towards the door, and then back at him with wide eyes. "This kind of scares me," she finally managed.

"Scares you?" He was flustered. Why was she scared?

"Your mother…and this room…you are so convinced that Lindsey is your baby. What if…" she chewed her lower lip. "What if…I mean, I want… but…if she is …Eddie's…"

"I'll love her anyway because she is your baby. I'll love her just the same. And I'll never let Eddie hurt her."

"I know…but you and your mother…if she isn't yours….the hurt it will cause."

Now that he understood what was bothering her, he knew how to respond. He put his free hand on the side of her face and lifted it so that he could look into her eyes. "Cath, I love you. I love Lindsey. And evidently so does my mother. And when Eddie is out of the picture, I intend to ask you to marry me. And then we'll make more babies." He felt something primal, instinctive when he talked about making more babies. It stirred deep within him. Yes, that was what he wanted, to make babies with this woman, to deposit his seed in her and watch it grow, to have the opportunity over and over again to nurture the love that he had for her and would have for their children. This epiphany stirred within him as an innate need in the depths of his core. He recognized the lust that he felt along with it, but there was a deeper emotion attached. "You'll be the mother of my children, the giver of life for us all. How can that possibly hurt me?"

Warmth spread through her as he spoke. He wanted her…wanted to make babies with her. "Babies? As in more than one or two?" Somehow she had never thought of him as wanting a child, let alone several.

He smiled at her. "As in a house full." There was no mistaking the sincerity in his expression.

"I had no idea that you wanted so many children?" she admitted.

"Neither did I…until now. But if they are your children…."

"So how many is a houseful?"

"Well," he seemed to be thinking. "Do you like baseball?" He was teasing her now.

"Baseball? What's that got to do with anything?"

"I want a team….and we'll need a couple to pinch hit off the bench too," he smiled.

"A whole team? How many is that?"

"Well, nine in the field and two or three on the bench."

"Hmmm…well, I'll take care of the infield but you are on your own for the outfield and the bench."

A subtle grin grew on his face as she spoke. "A whole team, Cath….we have Lindsey already. Only eight more to go. Then we'll negotiate about the bench." His eyes sparkled as he taunted her. "But, thinking about it…we probably need some for the bullpen."

"Bullpen? The only bull here is your inflated ego. What makes you think you have what it takes to produce a whole team?"

The amusement in his eyes changed to lust. No longer laughing, he answered. "You. With you," he paused and kissed her to add emphasis to his words, "I feel like a pervert…god, just looking at you makes me want to jump you and hump like a damned camel. I can't remember the last time I had a _hot_ shower."

She exploded in a fit of laughter. "Like a what?"

"A camel… you know…camels…humps?"

Catherine looked at Lindsey still lying quietly against his shoulder. "Well Mr. Mom, we really shouldn't be having this discussion in front of the children."

"Okay, as long as after the children are put to bed, we continue this discussion and take action. I'm going to insist on a whole team and we are going practice until I get my team."

"Oh, that's a promise," she said with twinkling eyes.

She watched as he put Lindsey in the crib. He was careful with her, gentle and loving, as he covered her with a blanket. She smiled as she noticed the little pink and yellow butterflies stitched into the blanket. He stood, his blue eyes watching the sleeping baby with wonder. _She has to be his…she just has to be. _Somewhere deep inside, Catherine knew that no matter what the paternity test said, Gil _would_ love her and look at her as his child. Catherine's own heart swelled as she realized his tremendous capacity for love; something that few understood about him and even fewer got to witness. Warmth spread through her as those eyes turned to her and she realized that even fewer were the objects of his love. _And I'm one of the select few…_

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Ahhh, the fluff of it all. I hope you enjoyed this one. Let me know and then you get to find out what happens next...


	22. Chapter 22

They spent the afternoon at the townhouse. Catherine enjoyed getting to know Gil's mother better and even found that she was able to understand a few of the signs used between the Grissoms.

Much to Catherine's delight, Mrs. Grissom began to tell little stories about Gil, who blushed and protested as he translated. Catherine learned that he had always been fascinated by bugs; as a five year old he had scared her by bringing home a spider in his pocket and forgotten to take it out. When she was preparing the laundry, it crawled out and sat on her hand, casing her to scream. Gil's father had scolded him but it wasn't very effective, the older woman remembered, because he had been laughing the whole time.

"I remember that," Gil smiled. "Dad was laughing and trying to sound so serious. You looked like you could have strangled us both." He paused a moment and then spoke to Catherine. "As young as I was, I could tell that Dad adored her… the way he looked at her…"

"Catherine knows the look, son. It was the same as the one you give her when you think she doesn't see" His mother turned from him to Catherine. "But you do see, don't you?" Her smile and the glitter in her eyes implied a shared bond, the bond formed from loving and being loved by Grissom men.

Catherine reached across and squeezed the woman's hand. "I do see. And loving him, being worthy of his love…that is most important to me now. That and…our baseball team."

She saw Gil flinch as he signed the last part to his mother. He looked sheepish as his mother asked about the team. Gil spoke as he signed. "I told Catherine that I want a lot of children… enough to field a baseball team."

His mother looked shocked. She glanced at Catherine and then glared at him. Catherine watched as her hands worked quickly to convey to her son how she felt about so many grandchildren.

"Gil?" Catherine asked.

"She says that if you are willing to carry and give birth to so many, then it is my duty to do the rest, including changing and washing all the diapers."

Catherine chuckled as she looked at his mother. To her surprise, the woman winked at Catherine and nodded as if to say, 'that'll be the end of that.' Then the woman turned to Gil and signed. He spoke her words for her. "Three or four would be a satisfactory number, I believe. Remember in Charlotte's Web, producing so many offspring was the end of her."

Catherine smiled inwardly as she tried to picture Gil as a boy, reading the classic children's tale. "That's not the same Mother," he retorted.

"Certainly it is," she replied. "Whether it is one or one thousand, a mother puts everything that she has into the well being of her children. It is our nature. And I've watched Catherine with Lindsey; she feels the same as I do. Besides, just giving birth to that many children takes a toll and Catherine is small. She would be willing to appease your foolishness and it would cost her health. No, Gil….you do not need a baseball team."

Catherine watched as the mother chastised the son and he not only had to accept it, he was forced to share it as the translator. Abashed blue eyes looked into amused ones as he looked at her. She winked and glancing to be sure his mother wasn't watching her, she said quietly, "But we can still practice, can't we?"

His eyes grew huge with anticipation and his mouth fell open slightly. His mother caught his response and looked at Catherine trying to understand what had just transpired. Judging by their expressions, she decided it was better that she not know.

Finally it was time for Gil to take Catherine and Lindsey back to Nancy's. The two women hugged and said good-bye. Catherine promised that she would have Gil teach her sign language so that they could chat next time they saw one another.

"You and Lindsey must come to visit when things are settled," the elder woman told Catherine. "Bring Gil if you must, but you and Lindsey are welcome anytime."

"Thank you. And we will. I hope your flight back tomorrow is smooth. And…I enjoyed getting to know you. And…well, just thank you. I wasn't expecting you to be so accepting…"

"My child, you are Gil's happiness. How could I reject his happiness? Now you take good care of yourself and that beautiful grandchild of mine."

"Oh, I will." They hugged again and then Gil ushered Catherine out to his car.

Once settle in the front seat, Catherine glanced out the window to see his mother waving from the front doorstep. "Look Lindsey, Grandmother Grissom is waving good-bye," she said as she waved one last time to the woman whose approval suddenly seemed very important to her.

The next morning Gil drove his mother to the airport and used the influence his departmental ID afforded to see her past security to her plane. As mother and son hugged, she squeezed him a little tighter. "Marry that girl as soon as she is free and then bring them for a visit. I want to spend more time with my granddaughter," she said before turning and walking to her plane.

Gil smiled and waved as she turned one last time before entering the walkway. Heading back to his car, he thought about her visit. Her acceptance of his situation and his little family had surprised him. But her assurance that Catherine was right for him gave him greater confidence. He would marry her as soon as Eddie was gone. And he would spend the rest of his life making her happy, making up to her all the hurt she had already suffered in life; and in doing so, it would heal his own pain and loneliness.

His phone was ringing when he walked into his house. Picking it up, he answered. "Grissom."

"Gil? It's Nancy…I came home and…"

"What? What's wrong?" His heart was pounding.

"Catherine…she's unconscious and Lindsey is…missing."

"Eddie."

"I think so. I've called an ambulance…but now what do I do?"

"I'm on my way. And I'll make the calls. Just…just take care of her…"

He hung up and immediately dialed Brass. Jim had an APB out on Eddie and his car in seconds. Gil wasn't surprised when Jim showed up at Nancy's just minutes after he arrived. The paramedics were loading her into the ambulance. "Which hospital?" Gil asked in a sickening replay of the last time.

"Desert Palm." The man closed the door and the vehicle sped away.

Jim used his lights and siren to get them there just behind the ambulance. For Gil everything seemed to be in slow motion. They moved to slowly taking care of his love and his own body felt as if lead were running through his veins. She was still out and that scared him. She had been unconscious too long. This was serious.

He stood in the hallway, across from her cubicle, waiting. Jim approached from down they hall. "They found Eddie. He's holed up with some drug creep friend of his. Lindsey is there. I told them to wait til I get there. You coming or you want to stay here with her?"

Gil looked at Nancy and then back into the cubicle at Catherine. "I'm coming."

The cold tone of his voice sent a chill through Brass. He had never heard Gil Grissom speak like that before. Jim followed Gil out to his car and the two sped away to deal with Eddie Willows one last time.

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Thank you to those who continue to encourage! Some are falling down on the job though; there weren't very many reviews on the last chapter:-( It's okay, I'll let it slide...this time. Anyway, the story is taking another direction a little. I hope you like.


	23. Chapter 23

Several uniformed officers waited outside the residence where Eddie was. Mitch, the senior officer at the scene and the one who had taken Eddie to jail before, walked towards the two men as they emerged from Brass's car. "He's in the living room. The baby is in a back bedroom. I have officers positioned to go through the window to get her as soon as we go through the front."

Brass studied the layout and thanked Mitch for setting things up. Hr turned to Gil, who was watching the front door intently. "You ready?"

Gil nodded and started walking, leaving Brass a few steps behind. As they approached the porch, Jim nodded at the officers on either side and they burst through. Gil was the next one in. Spotting Eddie on the couch, he was on top of the man before anyone had a chance to stop him. Gil's face was hard and cold as he grabbed Eddie, standing the dazed man in front of him, holding him up by his shirt. Eddie grunted, obviously in a drug induced stupor and went limp in Gil's grasp. Releasing his grip, Gil let him fall to the floor, crashing into a coffee table and hitting his head in the process. Reaching for him again Gil yelled, "Stand up you sorry son of a bitch. Stand up."

Eddie tried to straighten up but wobbled. He reached for Gil to steady himself but Gil was beyond reason and took it as a threat. Then he did something he had never done before in his life. He pulled his fist back and swung. He heard a satisfying crunch as his knuckles connected with Eddie's face and watched as the bastard crumbled to the floor. Gil started to go for him again but by then Jim was next to him, pulling Gil away. "Come on, man. He's not worth your career. We'll take care of him."

"Take care of him? He'll be back on the streets in a few hours. Meantime, Catherine…oh god, Catherine…." Coming out of his rage he demanded, "where's Lindsey?" He frantically looked around. One of the officers stepped into the room, holding the baby. Gil took her from the officer and walked out the front door. Standing on the front porch, he held her close to him and began to shake.

Jim walked out and put his hand on Gil's shoulder. "Come on. Let's get back to the hospital. Mitch can finish up here."

Nancy was relieved to see the two men come back with Lindsey. She took the baby from Gil and pointed toward the cubicle. "She needs you."

Gil walked inside and found her lying on the bed, tubes and wires all around her, connected in an eerie fashion. It looked to him like something out of science fiction. "God, Cath…what did he do to you?" he whispered as tears began to flow out of his eyes.

Just then the doctor stepped in. "It looks worse than it is," he commented.

Gil turned, glancing at the man before looking back at her. He wanted to ask questions but his mouth wouldn't work. So he just stared.

"She was hit several times in the face. One of the blows was serious enough to cause some bleeding in the brain but it has stopped. Sometimes the body is smarter than we are. Her brain needs a little time to heal and so she remains unconscious. She's not deep though… not like a coma. I imagine she'll wake in the next few hours. There are some contusions to her abdomen and ribcage. She won't feel like laughing for awhile. But I think she will be back to normal in a few weeks." The doctor studied Gil as he spoke. "Are you okay or should I get something for you?"

Gil blinked. "Ah…I'm fine…if she is okay, then I am okay."

"She will be, with time. We're making arrangements to move her to a room. You can sit with her here if you would like to."

Gil nodded as he pulled a stool over to her bed. He took her hand in his and held it, needing to feel her warmth, needing to know she was still with him. He was so frightened. He hadn't been this anxious about anyone since the afternoon so many years ago that he had gone to wake his Dad up from an afternoon nap. He tried and he tried but his father never woke up. The fear that gripped him that day was with him now. He watched her; he had no choice. He was afraid that if he looked away, she would slip away from him. He tried to focus on what the doctor had said…she would be okay, just needed this time asleep. But the doctor's words provided little comfort.

He thought of the day before and the discussion about children. Silently he promised God that he would be happy with whatever they were given if he could just have her. _I need her,_ he told God. _I love her so much. Please…_He was unaware of the tears that trickled down his face, unaware of the nurse that had stepped into the room to check on her and was spellbound by his intensity; he was only aware of Catherine as he watched her face for signs of waking, watched her chest as it rose and fell with each breath assuring him that she was still alive.

A few minutes later, Jim came in. He held an ice pack in his hands and gently took Gil's right hand to apply the pack to his knuckles. "You need this, buddy," he said. "Your knuckles aren't used to that kind of treatment."

Gil looked briefly at Jim and then at his hand. It was swollen and already showing signs of bruising. "The bastard locked up?"

"Actually, he's here…just going into surgery. Seems you broke him. Apparently you have a dangerous right cross." Jim smirked.

"He's here?" Gil asked with disgust.

"Yeah, but it isn't a problem. He'll be cuffed to the bed with a uniform guarding him. Between what he did to Catherine, kidnapping Lindsey, and all the drugs we found in the house, he'll be spending a very long time in prison. He won't bother them anymore."

Gil nodded, his attention going back to Catherine. "She has to be okay, Jim."

Jim looked at his friends, both hurting and then put his hand on Gil's shoulder. "She will be, Gil. And now she has you. It'll be even better." Jim stood there a minute and realized that Gil wasn't even aware of his presence. He shrugged, glanced one more time at Catherine and then left.

Gil sat there for hours, holding her hand and never taking his eyes off of her. Finally the nurse came in and told him that they were moving her. It took telling him twice to penetrate his watchful trance. He stood, still holding her hand. The nurse touched his arm and he flinched, looking at her stunned. "We're taking her to room 203. You can meet us there."

"I want to go with her. I….I can't leave her."

The nurse glanced at the orderly that was there to help. He shrugged. "Okay," she said. "But you can't hold her hand. You have to walk at the end of the bed."

Gil nodded and took his position at the foot of the bed. The nurse and the orderly unlocked the brakes on the wheels of the gurney and began to roll it out of the cubicle. Gil followed, his eyes never leaving Catherine.

Sometime in the night she woke, screaming. Gil was there and immediately tried to soothe her. He didn't need to call a nurse. She heard the screams and was in the room instantly. "She's waking with a nightmare," the nurse commented.

Gil held her hand and tried to talk to her but she kept screaming and crying. "No," she screamed. "Eddie…no. Lindsey, don't touch her…"

"Speak loudly and firmly to her," the nurse instructed Gil.

He nodded and leaned closer to her ear. "Catherine! Its okay, honey. You are safe. Lindsey is safe. Wake up, Cath. Please, honey…you have to wake up." He kept talking until finally she began to calm down. As she relaxed, his voice softened until he was speaking to her in quiet, loving tones. Her eyes opened and she looked into his. For a moment, he saw terror and then her expression quieted. "You're okay, honey. You're going to be sore for awhile, but you are okay."

Her eyes looked around the room and he realized what she was looking for. "Lindsey is okay too. She is with Nancy. You are both safe."

He watched as his words sank in. All the tenseness ebbed from her and she sank into the bed. Her eyes closed and he thought she had drifted back to sleep. He shifted his body on the chair and her eyes flew open, watching him, worried. "I'm here, Cath. I'm not leaving. I'm here with you."

She relaxed again and this time she did go back to sleep.

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Thanks for all the reviews! Yes, I'm afraid I have messed with their happiness, but just a little. Please forgive me for adding to the drama...or if you like it, well then...all the better! I feel this one winding down but there are a few more chapters, I believe. As always, reviews make the brain juices flow and keeps the writing going.


	24. Chapter 24

Catherine stayed in the hospital for several days. Jim made Gil leave for a few hours everyday assuring Gil that he would stay with Catherine while Gil went home for some sleep or a shower.

She got better each day but Gil's routine remained the same; he slept when she slept and was awake whenever she woke, helpingher eat and watching her fo signs of discomfort or fear. He watched her, trying to anticipate her every need until finally she snapped at him, exasperated with his hovering, as she called it. She was immediately sorry that she had snapped; his expression sending arrows of guilt through her heart. He looked like a scolded puppy. "Gil, I'm sorry. It's just that….well, you are smothering me," she said after she saw his reaction to her impatience.

He sat there, looking at her with his big blue eyes, looking like he would shy away if she spoke too strongly. She knew that all he wanted was to please her, to make her happy...to love her. She wasn't used to such treatment and it unnerved her. "Dammit Gil, don't look at me like that. It…it makes me…oh dammit, I just turn to putty when you look at me like that."

There was a subtle change in his expression and he seemed to be questioning her meaning, but he didn't speak. He just looked at her. He knew he should say something…anything, but he couldn't think of anything to say. He just wanted…needed to look at her, to be near her. And so the routine continued, with him watching her, gazing lovingly and her getting used to the idea that she was adored.

When the day came that she was released from the hospital, Nancy was there with Lindsey to take them back to her house. Gil was gathering Catherine's things, the flowers and cards that had been sent and her few personal items that had accumulated during her stay. Nancy stepped out of the room to let the nurse know that Catherine was almost ready to leave. "Gil," Catherine began.

He looked up from his task, his blue eyes focusing on her with tenderness. "Cath?"

"I know it would be easier if I went home with Nancy, but…"

"You don't want to go to her house?"

"No, I don't. I would rather…go home." She looked at him intently, hoping he would understand.

"Home? You mean your apartment?" He looked confused.

"No, I mean home…my real home…the one you made for me."

She saw the light dawn in his eyes as her meaning sank in. "So I did," he smiled. "And so you shall." And so he took her home. Home to the nest he had created for them.

Carefully he helped her inside while juggling Lindsey. Catherine sat in the living room while he took Lindsey to her room and put her in the crib. Then he hurried back to Catherine and helped her to the bedroom. Her movements were stiff and awkward, not at all her usual graceful motions. Gil winced as he watched her struggle.

After some careful maneuvering he had helped her undress. Reaching for her bag he asked what she would like to wear.

"Something comfortable. I think I have some flannel pants in there. Oh, and did Nancy pack my baggie t-shirt?"

Gil searched the bag and produced the pants but didn't find the t-shirt. He showed her the tops that were in the bag and she looked disappointed. "Why is the t-shirt so important?" he asked.

"It's not important so much…its just that…well, anything too tight just hurts; it irritates all the bruises."

"Oh," he said thoughtfully. His head spun around to his chest of drawers. He crossed the room and opened the chest. After searching the contents he produced one of his old t-shirts. Turning to her he held it up. It had several different bugs pictured on it with the words 'I'm Buggy" written across the front. Grinning at her he walked back to her. "You can wear this. It is made from really soft cotton."

She took the shirt and rubbed it against her face. "Hmmm, it is soft." She started to put her arms up to slip it over her head but the movement caused a spasm of pain. Gil moved closer to help her. Once the shirt was in place he stepped back to admire her outfit. "Elegant," he smiled.

"Yeah, right." She tried to sound sarcastic but her eyes gave away the amusement she felt.

He looked into her eyes and she thought she saw tears pooling in his. "Catherine…" he looked with wonder at her. "You always look elegant to me…so beautiful; like a goddess."

"A goddess?" Amusement saturated her voice. "With my rainbow colored face? Hardly."

"I do not now begin,--I still adore  
Her whom I early cherish'd in my breast;  
Then once again with prudence dispossess'd,  
And to whose heart I'm driven back once more…"

He smiled at her, touching her cheek with his fingers. "You are my goddess whom I adore with every part of my being." His soft voice sent ripples through her, comforting her and exciting her in the same instant.

"Hold me Gil. Please."

Carefully he moved closer to her and wrapped his arms around her. She laid her head on his shoulder and settled into him. "I don't know about the goddess thing, but I do know how much I love having you hold me. "

"Then I will do it often," he spoke quietly.

Lindsey chose that moment to cry. Catherine began to get up but Gil stilled her. "I'll bring her to you. Lie back and get comfortable."

As he left, she settled back on a stack of pillows and pulled a throw over her. Gil returned with Lindsey after a few minutes. "Her diaper needed changing," he said, his obvious pride beaming from his face.

"You changed her all by yourself?" Catherine giggled.

"Yes, I did. And the little tapes even stayed fastened. I think I'm getting the hang of this."

Catherine chuckled at his silliness. "You really are happy about her, aren't you?"

"Yes, I am." Carefully he laid Lindsey down on the bed next to Catherine and then settled on the bed beside them.

Catherine looked down at her baby, reaching to touch her and was delighted when Lindsey grabbed her finger and pulled. Lindsey wiggled and kicked her feet, delighting in all the attention that she was getting. Gil watched, his gaze moving from one to the other, silently recording this moment to be filed away in his mind and remembered for years to come.

Glancing up at him she smiled, seeing joy in his expression. "I'm glad you are happy," she said. Their eyes locked in one of those timeless moments where two souls connect and there is absolute understanding, contentment, and love…when two souls become one and are complete; a moment when a new universe was created that belonged solely to them.

PUREJOYPUREJOYPUREJOYPUREJOYPUREJOY

Hope you enjoyed! I do so appreciate all the kinds comments and encouragement. It just makes my heart go all fuzzy, lol. Anyway, next chapter is almost done and should be up soon.


	25. Chapter 25

Eddie Willows both gained and lost his freedom on the same day; his divorce was finalized in the morning and his sentencing was pronounced that afternoon. Catherine was not there to see his reaction to either.

She and Lindsey had officially moved in with Gil by the time Eddie was unloaded from the prison bus. That night, after Lindsey was asleep in her bed, Gil put soft music on the stereo, poured champagne and asked her to be his wife. They were married three weeks later with Jim as their witness. Lindsey's paternity test came back a week after the wedding and proved that LIndsey was indeed his child. Within a few days, she too was officially a Grissom.

Nine months, two weeks, and three days later Gil held Catherine's hand as she delivered their son, Gilbert James Grissom. Gil thought Catherine had never looked more beautiful than that night in the delivery room.

Catherine continued to drive him insane with desire and a little over a year after that, their second son was born. They named him John Joseph after his paternal grandfather. Grandmother Grissom was present for the birth and couldn't have been more proud.

She began dropping hints to her son that three babies in such a short amount of time was too hard on his bride. He considered what she said and discussed it with his wife. Sixteen months later, about nine months after Catherine had accompanied him on a recruiting trip that included Texas A& M, another daughter was born, Caitlyn Marie.

During that time changes were being made at the lab also. Catherine had decided to move back into a tech position so that her schedule at least would always be predictable. Gil remained in his position on the graveyard shift. He was actively recruiting as the department expanded and found a new protégé at the local university. Warrick Brown joined the team the day after Catherine found out that she was pregnant with Caitlyn. Besides their fourth child, the A & M trip produced another addition to their lives. Nick Stokes joined the team along with Brown. Catherine noticed that Gil was more excited about his job as he had not one, but two new pupils.

_He's a natural teacher,_ she thought one night as she looked for him to share 'lunch.' Gil was in the layout room with his two rookies, explaining some aspect of the current case. The two young men had watched and listened with enthusiasm, their attention never wavering. Catherine smiled as she took in the scene and remembered her first days as Gil Grissom's student.

One day when Caitlyn was almost three months old, Gil came home to find four cranky children and an exhausted wife. Taking in the scene, he made a rare instant decision. "Honey," he said as they settled into bed that night. "I've been invited to a forensics seminar in San Francisco in a couple of months. We've been talking about hiring a nanny, let's do it and then you can go with me to the seminar. We could make a little vacation out of it…you know, a Gil and Catherine vacation."

"Oh Gil," she beamed. "That would be fantastic. But I don't want to leave the kids with a stranger."

"We could hire the nanny and then have your mother stay too. That way she would be here to watch out for the kids but the nanny would do most of the work. It wouldn't wear your mom out. Please honey, you need a break. And I need some time alone with you."

Catherine looked at her husband with an impish grin. "The last time you had time alone with me was the recruiting trip. That's how we got Caitlyn, remember? And the time before that was when Nancy insisted on taking the kids for a weekend and we spent it at that inn out at Lake Meade. John was the product of that weekend."

Gil grinning sheepishly. "I can't help it if I find you irresistible. And you were wearing that strip of cloth that you called a bikini. What did you expect? You know what you do to me…and….and you just made it worse when you wore that thing."

Catherine giggled as she remembered his reaction to her attire. "As I recall, I didn't get to wear it for long."

Her giggle was muffled by his mouth covering hers in a sudden kiss that left little question of his intentions for the night. She felt his heat intensify as his kiss deepened and also felt her own response to him. She loved the feel of him next to her, his hands all over her, his lips nibbling her. Her own hands sought him, needing to touch his skin, feel his heat, and pull him closer.

"Say you'll come with me," he said in a lust filled, hoarse voice.

"But Gil…" she managed to whisper through her quickened breaths.

"Say you will…" he insisted as his lips travelled to her breast.

"But …the kids…."

"You are coming with me…" he taunted as his tongue gently teased her nipple, barely touching it as he flicked her hardness.

"You…don't…play fair," she gasped.

"Oh, but you like the way I play. And I want to play in San Francisco." His tongue was circling her now and his lips closed in on her, sucking and pulling.

"But…" His hand cupped her through her panties and he squeezed, sending a thrill up her spine and through her body. "Oh…geez Gil…you so don't play fair," she moaned as she gripped him in a wave of desire.

"You'll love it in San Francisco, Cath. I promise…"

"It's a pretty city? I've never been there."

"I think you'll enjoy it…" he told her as his fingers began to tease her soaking slit. "What little you'll see of it anyway…"

"See? Why little?" she managed to say through her lusty haze.

He pulled her panties off and stood on his knees above her, gazing down at her. "God Catherine, you are so beautiful. You know what you do to me, don't you?"

"I have a pretty good idea," she snickered as she gazed at his bulging crotch. "Better get out of those pants while you still can…"

He slid out of his clothes and stretched out next to her, his hands caressing the length of her body.

"Why will I see so little of the city?" she asked.

"I intend to keep you busy in the hotel room," he said as he moved to tease her slit again, this time with his tongue. She sucked in air as his hot tongue came into contact with her nub and he began to circle it. Then he made his way through her folds, gently licking and sucking as he went.

Catherine gasped again and grabbed the sheets, writhing in pleasure and desire at his touch. "Now Gil…"

"What?" he looked up in surprise. Usually she liked him to take it slow, especially so soon after the birth of a child.

"I want you now. Thinking about you is what kept me sane all day…I've thought of nothing else but the feel of you inside…NOW Gil."

His entry was easy because she was soaking wet. Her box was so hot that his cock throbbed the minute it was in. He remained still for a minute to let his rod adjust and then slowly he began to stroke. He closed his eyes as he thrilled in the sensation of her walls surrounding him, massaging his cock as it travelled deeper. Her hips thrust up towards him, offering better access and more teasing. After a few strokes, he paused deep inside and opened his eyes to gaze into hers. Their eyes remained locked for a few strokes, fueling more and more desire until he thought he would explode.

He paused again, taking a deep breath. "Smell that Catherine…smell us?" The combination of scents from their arousal filled the room, making his head spin with hunger. He knew that in just a few minutes, the aroma would become heavier as the smell of their climaxes would permeate the air. "I love that smell, baby. I love the scent of us together."

"Mmmm," she agreed. "Taste…the taste of you…kiss me …"

Gil eased himself toward her face, their lips joining and then their tongues dancing, imitating the motion of his cock, thrusting and licking. His strokes into her became more vigorous as they climbed the heights of ecstasy until together they climaxed in a magnificent release, their bodies responding to the other's pleasure and slowly coming back to earth in fits of renewed pleasure until they collapsed with exhaustion and satisfaction. Their perfect moment ended too quickly, however, when the mood shattering whimper of their youngest child was heard on the baby monitor. Catherine chuckled at Gil when he collapsed on the bed in a grunt and a moan. She started to get up when his hand shot out to stop her. "Stay," he whispered. "I'll go see about her." He pulled on his boxers and a t-shirt and then leaning back to her, gently kissed her before padding off to take care of the latest addition to the Grissom family.

PUREJOY X 1000

Reviews please! It makes me type faster:-)


	26. Chapter 26

The next morning Gil was up early. By the time Catherine and the children were awake he had fixed a large breakfast. He helped John eat as Catherine held Caitlyn while she nursed. Lindsey and 'Little Gil' were on their own. Just as they were finishing, Gil announced that he had a project to do that day and would need Lindsey and 'Little Gil' to help him. Both children were excited. They liked Daddy's projects.

As she helped him clean the kitchen, Catherine asked what the project was. "Oh no," he said. "You don't get to know about it until it is finished. The kids can help me but you don't get to come near it until I say so."

Catherine stared at him incredulously. "What do you mean…I can't go near it? So help me Gil Grissom, if you are getting my children involved in anything…"

Kissing her to stop her rampage, he muffled her words. He held the kiss until he felt her relax and kiss him back. Finally releasing her lips, he held his mouth close to hers. "Please? I just want to surprise you…and I know the kids will have fun with it. Besides, it'll keep two of them occupied all day and give you a little break."

She looked into his face…he was wearing that unbelievably lovable little boy look that he knew always got her. How could she argue? "Okay, I'll give you your space."

He smiled, patted her on the butt, and called to his oldest two children that it was time to go. Picking up the keys to the SUV, he ushered them out, winking at Catherine as he closed the door.

Catherine heard them when they got back a couple of hours later. She heard the truck pull in and then heard noises in the backyard. Glancing out of the window, she saw them carrying things to the far back corner and piling them in stacks. Remembering her promise, she moved away from the window and fought the urge to peek all afternoon long.

Gil and his crew took only a short break for lunch. Once Lindsey came running in to go to the bathroom. She was hot, dirty and tired but gleeful. Catherine tried to pry information from her eldest child, now nearly five, but couldn't get anywhere.

"No Mommy, it's a secret. Daddy said so. If I tell you, it will ruin the surprise." Then she bolted out the door to get back to the guys.

Catherine gave into temptation once and peeked out the back door, but couldn't make sense of what she saw. The kids were digging and Gil was hammering on something. Shaking her head, she turned away in response to a cry from Caitlyn. Once the baby was settled, she sat down to play for a few minutes with John. As Catherine played with her younger son, she thought how much like Gil he was. _Named the wrong one after his father. Little Gil is more like me…outgoing and direct…always into trouble. John is more like his father; quiet and thoughtful. I wonder what goes on in that little head of his sometimes. Lindsey is like me too…headstrong. I wonder what Caitlyn will be like?_

Late in the afternoon she heard the little work crew at the back door. Lindsey and Gil were jumping with excitement. 'Big Gil' was looking pretty excited too…and very self satisfied. "Are you ready for your surprise?" he asked.

A huge smile broke out on her face as she nodded. He held out a very dirty hand that showed signs of more than one miss with a hammer and took hers. Hand in hand they walked to the back of the yard, three children running and bouncing behind them because John had joined his siblings.

As they got closer, she realized he had built a small gazebo. Her mouth opened in surprise as an "Oooo" escaped. He grinned. "It was a kit. Everything was precut. We just had to put it together."

The two helpers were running around the outside and jumping, pointing at the beds around the walls. "And Mommy there's flalurs," exclaimed 'Little Gil.'

"Yes, I see. Did you plant the flowers?" she asked.

"Uh huh…me and Linsey," he said proudly. "We digged and digged and then we stuck them in."

"I picked the colors," exclaimed Lindsey. "Daddy said they need to be bright so I got red and orange and lellow."

Tears welled up in Catherine's eyes. "They are so beautiful. It is all so beautiful." She hugged the children and hugged John too and thanked him for playing with her. "You kept me busy while Daddy and the others fixed the surprise." John smiled happily that he was included in the excitement.

"Okay kids," Gil said. "Go inside and get your water bottles from the fridge. Then go sit on the patio and cool down. We'll all need baths after this too."

The children ran off, happy with their surprise. Gil turned to Catherine. "You really like it?"

"It's amazing."

"I thought maybe it could be your quiet place…when you need a break. And the plants…they attract butterflies. Later in the summer, it will be like a butterfly garden."

"A butterfly garden? That will be beautiful," she said as she looked at the small plants and tried to envision it in a few months.

"Not as beautiful as you," he said quietly, watching her.

She looked into his eyes, so blue and so full of love. Tears trickled down her cheeks as her throat tightened. "Why a butterfly garden? I mean, I know you like insects and all, but you could have just done a regular garden and it would still be beautiful."

"Because when I think of you, I think of butterflies…small and delicate; beautiful….free and independent. And you bring so much beauty into my life, and…" His mouth closed and he just stared at her; looking like he had yet another secret to share.

"And what, Gil?"

"And…you make me feel like a butterfly. I was in a kind of cocoon…since my Dad died really. I refused to let anyone get too close, thought all I needed was me. And slowly you unwrapped me and taught me to spread my wings. I feel like a very different person than I was before you came into my life."

"You the same man, Gil. Still the same gentle, kind, caring man I met on my first day at the lab. You've just opened up a little and let the world in…let me in."

"I love you, Cath. I love the life you've given me…the kids…everything. It still amazes me that you love me…want to be with me. I still don't understand why."

Smiling, she gave him the same answer he had used on her so many times. "So many reasons, Gil. I have so many reasons."

PUREJOY ALL THE TIME!

Still okay? Don't worry, we'll get to SanFran eventually. It'll be after...well, I can't tell you, it's a secret.


	27. Chapter 27

Two nights later they were at the lab when Gil poked his head into the break room where Catherine was sipping some coffee. "Hey, we've got more crimes than we have criminalists tonight. Care to help me out?"

"You want me in the field?" she asked, mildly surprised.

"Yeah, I need you." He walked towards her, ran his fingers through some of her hair that had fallen into her face and pushed it back, and kissed her. It was a chaste kiss but also a very unusual thing for him to do at work. "But then, I always need you," he smiled.

"You kiss all your female subordinates like that?" she teased.

"Only the lucky ones…" he countered.

She swatted at him, feigning a hit when Jim walked in. "Hey…hey, break it up, you two. And technically, Catherine, you are _my_ subordinate." Winking, he poured a cup of coffee. "So, you gonna help the genius out tonight?"

"Wouldn't have to if you'd quit chasing off all the new hires."

"Hey, Stokes and Brown have survived and the last one lasted …what, a whole two days?" He grinned.

"My point," she said.

Jim looked at Gil, who was watching the two and smiling. "Hey Bugman, you gonna let your woman abuse me like that? Come on….I need some help here."

Gil threw out his hands, palms up as if to say 'not me.' "Look you have to put up with it for a few hours at the lab. I'm going to pay the price at home if I get involved." He received another swat from Catherine.

"So, Catherine…you gonna help Gil out or not? Otherwise I have to steal one of Ecklie's guys from days and we all know how well that works."

"Yeah…just don't give me anything that turns into a double."

"How about a B&E just off the strip?" Gil asked.

"Okay, give me the slip. I'll go dust off my kit." She took the offered slip from Gil, swatted him one more time and walked out, headed for the locker room. Both men watched her leave and then Jim turned to Gil. "Man, you gotta be the luckiest guy on the planet."

"I know," Gil grinned. "And I'm reminded of it everyday." Jim headed back to his office and Gil headed to his own crime scene, a homicide at the Oasis.

Two hours later, Jim called Gil. "Meet me at Catherine's crime scene." He barked into the phone.

"What? Why?" Panic hit Gil in the chest as surely as if Jim had punched him there. "Catherine? Is she okay?"

"Just meet me there." Jim said and the phone went dead.

Gil turned the scene over to Nick Stokes. "Just do what you are sure about. I'll get somebody else over here to help you. Don't get in over your head though, Nick."

"Okay…copy that, boss." The young CSI nodded towards the door. "You go take care of Catherine, we'll be okay here." Gil didn't hear him because he was already running out.

There was an ambulance at the scene when he got there and several officers milling around. Jim met him at the door to the building as Gil ran towards it. "It's okay, she's gonna be okay," he told Gil.

Gil looked past Jim through the doorway and saw her on the floor, paramedics over her. For an instant he forgot to breathe. His whole world was in there on the floor. His heart jumped into his throat as panic set in again. "Hear me? She's gonna be okay…" Jim said again. Gil nodded as his words registered but the lump stayed in his throat. Slowly he walked to her.

He tried to find a place where he could be next to her and still out of the medic's way. He decided on her feet. Kneeling, he put his hand on her ankle and watched. Her eyes were closed and he thought she was unconscious. As the EMT inserted an IV, her eyes flew open, however. Gil gripped her ankle, understanding that it had hurt her. She looked at him and relaxed, a small smile trying to form on her lips. "Cath…" he whispered.

She kept her eyes on him while the medics worked. Finally they were ready to lift her onto a gurney. Gil stood, keeping his hand on her. Once they had her on the bed, they began to roll towards the ambulance. Gil followed. "I'm going with you," he told one of the medics. The woman nodded. Gil tossed his keys to Jim. "Have somebody take my car back." Jim caught the keys and nodded. He stood in the street as he watched the ambulance roll away, his two friends inside. Then he turned to the officer that was supposed to have covered Catherine and unleashed his wrath.

Gil hovered in the hall as the ER doctor examined Catherine. Finally he stepped out to talk to Gil. "She took a pretty several blow to the head but luckily the swelling went out instead of in. She'll have a good sized knot on her head and it will be sore for a few weeks, but she'll be okay. There are some other contusions and abrasions along her rib cage but other than the soreness, nothing to worry about. She says you have four children at home?"

"Yes, we do." Gil answered, relieved that nothing sounded too serious.

"Then I would like to keep her here the rest of the night. We'll put her in a quiet room and let her get some rest. Other than a mild painkiller for her head, that's my prescription…plenty of rest."

"She'll get it, doc. And thank you." Gil said quietly, his eyes on his wife inside the room.

The doctor glanced from one Grissom to the other and smiled. "Go hold her hand. I think you both need it. I'll see her in the morning before she is released."

Gil walked in, pulled up a stool and sat. He took her hand, kissed it, and put it over his heart, holding it gently but firmly to him. Their eyes locked and although nothing was said, everything was communicated; his fear, her need of him, his love, her comfort…everything.

He took her home the next afternoon. Catherine's mother, Lily had stayed with the children and all of them were relieved to see Gil pull in the drive with Catherine in the passenger seat. He helped her from the car and held onto her as she made her way inside. She stopped to hug the children and her mother and then walked straight to the bedroom.

Gil took the children into Lindsey's room and sat them down to explain that Mommy needed her rest. "A bad man hurt her last night and now she has a really bad headache. We need to be quiet so she can sleep. When she sleeps the boo boo heals faster and we want Mommy to get better fast, don't we?"

Lindsey looked at her Dad. "Why did the bad man hurt her?"

.

"Uncle Jim is trying to find out, honey."

"You didn't vesigate?"

"No, Lindsey. I went to see the doctor with Mommy. I trust Uncle Jim to take care of the bad man. I needed to see about Mommy. That was my job."

Little Gil piped in, "but you a vestigator…that's your job.."

"Yes. It is. But my number one job is taking care of Mommy and you kids, so I went with Mommy."

John, who was just beginning to really talk, suddenly started crying. "John, why are you crying?"

"Mommy hurt. Don't want Mommy hurt."

Gil pulled his younger son into his lap. "She is hurt, John. But the hurt will go away. And we can help by being quiet and letting her sleep, okay?" All the children nodded. "Okay, you guys go water the new flowers and then come back in quietly. If Mommy feels up to it, we'll cuddle in the big bed and read a story."

They left Gil and headed for the back door. He went to their bedroom to check on Catherine. "You still awake?"

She nodded. "Why was John crying?"

"He didn't want you to be hurt. They are watering the flowers and then I told them that if you are up to it, we'd cuddle in the bed and read a story. I'm sorry, I know the jiggling will hurt your head, but they need to see you."

Catherine nodded. "Yeah, but a short story. Then I think I'll try to go back to sleep."

Gil sat on the edge of the bed. "Honey, I'm sorry. I put you at that scene. If I hadn't…"

Her hand went to his shoulder. "Stop Gil. It was my job to be there. And I like doing it. It felt good to be back in the field and until that guy came out of nowhere and hit me, I was enjoying myself. So, no second guessing and no regrets. Okay?"

Gil looked into her eyes, tears forming in his. "Jim told me earlier that I'm the luckiest guy on the planet."

"Smart man, that Jim," she smiled.

"Yeah…and the smartest thing _I_ ever did was marrying you. God Cath….if you had been seriously hurt…or …worse" he choked as a tear rolled down his cheek.

"But I wasn't," she said softly. "I'm here and aside from a headache, I'm good. I have too much fun tormenting you, Gil Grissom, to give it up now."

They sat in quiet comfort, each peaceful and content with the other, loving and being loved. And then the children came running in.

The next day Catherine wanted to get up and get back into her routine. Between Gil and Lily, she was forced to stay in bed again that day….and the next. But on the third day, her stubbornness won out and she was moving around the house, playing with the children and taking on minor household tasks. Gil refused to let her go back to work until the swelling was gone. Within two weeks, their lives were back to normal and for the Grissoms it was as if nothing had ever happened

For a man named Stan Moyers, life was not as good. On Catherine's first night back at work, Moyers sat in a holding cell nursing several bruises and a busted lip. Somehow he had mysteriously tripped down a flight of stairs when Jim arrested him for burglary and assaulting an officer. He was arraigned later that night and moved to the county jail. Jim didn't get any paperwork done that night. His knuckles were swollen, making writing difficult. Catherine saw his hand and put the pieces together. Hugging him she whispered, "I never had a big brother before. It feels kinda nice."

Later Gil thanked him for looking out for Catherine. "Guess I know not to piss her off," he teased. "She'll send you after me."

"Bet your ass, she will. And I'll take care of it too," he laughed. "But…it won't ever happen, Gil. You two…you have something really special."

Gil heard the envy in the other man's voice. "I know Jim…and it keeps getting better."

PUREJOY ROCKS PUREJOY ROCKS PUREJOY ROCKS

What did you think of the surprise? Just a little drama and angst before SanFran. It's up next. Reviews make it happen!


	28. Chapter 28

Gil interviewed several women for the job of nanny. When he had worked the number down to three, he let Catherine take over They chose a young woman who was taking classes at the local university as a part time student. Within a week Erin O'Donnell was a valued member of their household. Gil also bought a mini van. He was still driving his Mercedes and Catherine still preferred her little Toyota. The van was for whoever was driving the kids.

The children took to Erin immediately. Lindsey and Gil followed her around, enjoying a new playmate. John liked having someone else in the house that was willing to read to him and watch the nature shows on the Discovery channel. Little Caitlyn giggled over the extra attention she received. Things were very happy in the Grissom house as Gil and Catherine prepared for their trip to San Francisco.

"I'm glad you insisted on this," Catherine admitted as they snuggled in bed on the night before the trip. "I am looking forward to having you all to myself for hours at a time."

"Me too," he whispered. "And I intend to make use of the time."

Catherine giggled. "I wish someone had warned me that I was marrying a sex fiend before I had to find out the hard way."

"Hard? Yes…that's me when you are around. Sex fiend? Only where you are concerned. There isn't another woman on the planet that can do to me what you do to me…and for me."

"Gil?"

"Mmmm?" He tightened his arm around her, pulling her closer.

"Promise me?"

"What, honey?" His soft voice settled over her like a warm blanket.

"It will always be like this…there will never be anyone else."

He heard the fear in her voice and it unsettled him. He rolled over to look at her. "Honey?"

"It's just… so many men cheat… Jim told me he even cheated on his wife…after she cheated on him several times but still… I think it would crush me if…"

"Cath…stop. I couldn't do that …not to you, not to us. I love you; I love the life we have, the family we've made together. Besides, like I said there isn't another woman that could get to me the way you do. Geez Cath…you're the center of my universe, how could you think that I would ever….damn…don't you know me better than that?"

She saw how upset he was. It hurt her…hurt her that she had hurt him by even suggesting that he could cheat on her. "I'm sorry Gil. It's just…well, Nancy found out that Jerry cheated on her. And I thought they were like we are…you know…committed totally. It upset me…and left me feeling, unsettled."

He pulled her into a hug. "I'm sorry that happened to Nancy. Jerry's an idiot to do that. But it'll never happen to us, I promise. I need you too much; you make me whole. I could never risk losing you; trust that Cath, trust that without you I'd be lost. And I know I'm clueless about a lot of normal people stuff, but I am smart enough to know that about myself."

"I do trust you, Gil. I just don't trust all those women out there. I've seen the way they look at you. Hell, I look at you like that too. I can't blame them for wanting you…I find you irresistible."

"Oh you do?" he chuckled. "I'll have to remember that…" He held her until she drifted off to sleep. He was still surprised by her concern about him and any other woman. As far as he knew, they all just thought he was a geek, a weird science nerd. How could she think they saw him any differently? But then, she did…so maybe they did too. It really didn't matter to him. All he knew was, he was who he was and she loved him anyway. As long as she loved him, he had everything he needed.

They hurried out of the house and sped to the airport, arriving just in time to make the flight to San Francisco. Once the plane landed, they took a cab to the hotel and settled into their room. "Dinner?" he asked he as he walked up behind her, wrapping his arms around her waist as she looked out of the window at the bay.

"Yeah…and an early evening. You have to be rested and fresh for your students tomorrow."

"I don't know about the rested part…rest wasn't what I had in mind for the night," he said as he nuzzled into her neck. "I do intend to be in a very good mood."

She turned, giving him access to her lips, of which he took full advantage. Dinner became a call to room service between lovemaking. Not having children nearby gave them a freedom they seldom enjoyed and Gil found it intoxicating, giving him energy he no longer thought he was capable of. Catherine reveled in the freedom also, giving and taking pleasure time and again until they both were exhausted and totally satiated. They slept soundly and woke to the light of sunrise in their window, celebrating the new day in one more round of ecstasy. When Gil finally made it to the shower, his knees were weak from the physical exertion and the emotional euphoria of the last few hours. He leaned against the shower wall and let the warm water flow over him, his tears mixing in the cascade. He was so happy… so unbelievably happy that he couldn't hold it in.

The shower curtain opened and she slipped in with him. He pulled her into an embrace and they simply stood there for a while, letting the water flow over them. He couldn't have responded sexually if he had wanted too, she had seen to that earlier. But right now, sex was not what he wanted. He just wanted to hold her, feel her there with him, and feel her chest moving agains his as they breathed the same air.

She felt much the same. This was her man; the center of her universe and he loved her more than she felt she deserved to be loved. And she needed him. So they stood there, holding each other, each clutching the other so tightly that breathing was hard. But they remained, needing those moments. And then the water began to turn cold and they were forced to step out, back into reality.

They dressed and headed down to the restaurant for breakfast. "You sure you want to sit through Professor Grissom's boring lectures?" he asked over his cup of coffee.

"I am. Besides, if I am there when you finish it will give us more time to see the sights."

Setting his cup down, he reached across the table and took her hand. "You are the only sight I am interested in. I want to spend every minute I can with you on this trip."

His manner was so quiet and gentle but his intent was clear. She smiled at him and squeezed his hand. "Me too. I don't want you out of my sight."

He smiled at her and then glanced at the check. Laying money on the table, he took her hand and walked with her through the restaurant and into the hotel lobby. "Have to go back up and get my notes for today," he told her.

"I'll wait here. The way I'm feeling right now, you won't make the class if I go up with you."

He smirked and grinned, kissed her hand, and then turned towards the elevators. She stood in the lobby, watching the people who were passing through and thinking that none of them could possibly be as happy as she was.

PUREJOYPUREJOYPUREJOYPUREJOY

Reviews please. You know, I always seem to make these two behave like rabbits. It all started when I saw Billy lay that smooch on Marg on ET. Ah...the chemistry! Anyway, reviews please?


	29. Chapter 29

Comments have been made in response to my comment about making them behave like rabbits and also about how horny Grissom is in this story. What can I say, the chemistry is there. If you liked the last chapter, you'll probably like this one too, teehee.

PUREJOYPUREJOYPUREJOY

They met the chairman of the symposium committee in his office and he walked them to the lecture hall that would house Gil's part of the conference. It was a typical lecture room geared for large classes. There was a table with a podium on it, complete with microphone. A large white screen hung on the wall behind the table and there were several different options for demonstrations. Had Gil brought a laptop with a PowerPoint presentation, the set up would accommodate it. There was a slide projector and also an over head projector on a cart in the corner. Catherine smiled as Gil eyed the overhead projector.

Seating was arranged in a semi circle in stadium fashion with steps going up and rows of desks on each section. Consequently, Gil would be seen and heard by everyone in the room. Gil stood behind the podium and looked around the room. _This feels good,_ he thought. _Nothing quite feels the same as teaching inquisitive minds._

Catherine watched as her husband moved into 'professor mode' as she called it. His demeanor changed and there was a special brightness in his expression. _This should be his next career…_she thought.

The chairman, Don Phillips, asked if there was anything that Gil needed. Gil assured him that everything was fine and Phillips left. Gil set his notes on the podium, arranged and rearranged them several times and then checked his watch. Catherine saw that he was getting nervous and decided to distract him from his nervousness. "This room brings back some good memories for me," she said.

Gil looked at her, an eyebrow lifting slightly and an inquisitive expression forming on his face. "Oh? A favorite class?"

Catherine sat on the table looking mischievous. "No…a favorite professor."

"And she lectured in a room like this?"

"No..well…yeah, _he_ did. But that has nothing to do with my memories."

"Really?" His amusement was evident in his tone. He knew she was about to say something outrageous.

"I stayed after class one day. Actually, I sat on his desk like I'm sitting here now while I asked him questions."

"What were the questions about?" He knew he was being set up but he wanted to see where she was going with her story.

"Anatomy." Catherine fought to keep a serious expression.

"Human or animal?"

"Defiantely human…his."

Her flippant attitude made him smile. "And just what questions did you ask?"

"Oh…it had to do with the reproductive organs. I made him demonstrate."

A small grin was working at the corners of Gil's mouth. "Perhaps later you'll demonstrate for me."

"Perhaps I will; row four, third seat from the left…well, third and fourth seat." She couldn't contain it any longer, her laughter spilled out, filling the room. Gil looked at her with an expression of amused tolerance. "Are there other professors that I should know about?"

"Only one; but you already know about him."

"Oh?"

"Yeah. He gives really great," she paused for effect and then continued, "demonstrations."

Gil looked at her, waiting for the punch line but she sat quietly.

Finally he gave in and asked, "Who is this professor?"

Looking at him out of the corner of her eye she stated very matter of factly, "you."

"So you like my demonstrations?"

"I do. They are very….stimulating."

Gil stepped up to her, bent his head down to her ear and whispered. "Things get anymore stimulating and these students are going to get a demonstration that they will never forget."

Catherine looked at him coyly. "And that's bad because?"

Before he could answer, the door opened and a small group of forensics students walked in to find seats. Catherine slipped off the table and climbed the steps, finding a seat in the center back of the room. Every time Gil looked up, he would be looking at her.

After a few minutes, the symposium attendees were all settled in their places and Gil began his lecture. Catherine listened for a few minutes then she began to observe the group that had gathered to hear her husband. Most of them were younger, either students or younger professionals just beginning their careers. There were a few older faces in the group, probably other speakers that had come to Gil's presentation out of curiosity or professional courtesy.

About a half hour into his lecture Gil looked up at his wife, who seemed to be fidgeting in her chair. He had wondered that morning why she had chosen the particular outfit she wore, one of her 'court suits' that had a dark blue skirt. Now she was showing him the reason for her choice. She rearranged her legs so that instead of the prim, lady-like pose from earlier, she now sat with her legs apart revealing the fact that she was wearing thigh high hose connected to a black garter belt. Trying to keep his mind on the lecture, Gil shifted his eyes, glancing over the heads of several people in front of and below her; one was a young brunette. Gil couldn't resist his wife's flirting however, and his eyes soon travelled back to her little demonstration. It was then that he realized that she was wearing nothing under the garter belt; he had a tunnel view of her femininity. She pulled her skirt up slightly and smiled coyly at him, setting off a coughing fit and causing him to reach for the glass of water someone had thoughtfully placed next to the podium.

He glanced back up to see her smirking as she scooted the skirt further up her thighs and he quickly averted his eyes, passing them once more over the brunette. He continued his talk, glancing frequently up to see his wife revealing more and more of herself to him. The top button of her blouse was unbuttoned, followed by two more until a fair amount of cleavage was showing. Occasionally she would 'adjust' the collar, flashing more skin. Somehow Gil managed to keep talking but was thankful for the fixtures in front of him. Normally Gil liked to move around a little in his lectures, sometimes even walking around to the front of the table and sitting on it. Not today. Today, he was firmly planted behind the podium, concealing his reaction to his wife's antics.

The first half of his lecture was winding down. A fifteen minute break was scheduled before resuming the last half. He was trying to concentrate on his talk but by now, his cock had been rock hard for almost an hour and his wife was continuing to torture him. All he really wanted to concentrate on was sitting several rows behind the others, her pelvic region in motion as if responding to his imagined strokes. By this point, Gil was fighting some very primal urges and wondered how he was going to mange not being discovered.

Finally, he reached the stopping point and dismissed the group for their break. Just as he feared, several students flocked to the podium, trying to speak to him personally. One was the brunette who had been showered with Gil's unintentional attention. He was relieved to hear Catherine from the back of the group. "Please, Dr. Grissom needs to take a break also. Let's give him a few minutes."

The group disbursed and Gil and Catherine were left standing alone in the room. "Row four I believe you said?"

Catherine smiled and grabbed his hand. Tugging she pulled him out of the door and down the hall to a staff lounge. Once inside and sure that they were alone, she locked the door. He was on her…before the sound of the tumbler echoed in the room. "God woman, that was cruel," he moaned as unleashed his tool and entered her.

She giggled and then nipped at his ear. She responded to strokes that were no longer imaginary and his explosion came fast and hard, leaving him leaning into her, panting. She nuzzled his neck and moaned. "I think I like this side of you, Gil…so…caveman."

Gil lifted his face to look into hers, an amused glint in his eyes. "Cavemen took their women whenever and wherever they wanted to. You are playing with fire when you sit up there and torture me like that."

Catherine smiled. "Oh, I like fire."

They quickly rearranged themselves, Catherine being careful that Gil returned without any outward signs of his fireworks display in the lounge. She lingered a few minutes after he left, taking care that she also didn't give away their secret. Gil walked back into the lecture room to find the attendees seated and waiting for him. Shuffling his notes, he began speaking. A few minutes later he caught sight of Catherine entering the room; his eyes followed her as she ascended to her seat and settled in for the rest of his talk.

HOPEYOULIKEDIT!

Okay, that was kind of fun to write. I hope you enjoyed reading it.


	30. Chapter 30

The next day Gil was scheduled to make another presentation in the afternoon. He planned to attend talks presented by other speakers in the morning and asked Catherine if she was coming with him. She thought about it for a few minutes and decided to let him go on his own. She had some shopping she wanted to do and she knew he wouldn't enjoy that. Besides, he enjoyed the intellectual exercises with his peers far more than she did. This way, they each would have some time alone to do things they enjoyed. "Besides," she told him, "if we split up today, that just means you'll have time to think about how much you miss me when I'm not around."

He had chuckled in response. "Honey, after yesterday, I have a lot to think about. Your morning exhibition was certainly something I will never forget. And all the pen sucking and lip licking you did in the afternoon had me hiding behind the podium again."

"I didn't hear you complaining last night," she shot back.

He smiled at her, his bright eyes reflecting his love for her. "No self respecting caveman would complain about last night," he quipped. Changing the subject he asked her how much shopping she had to do.

"Not a lot. Mostly I want to find souvenirs for the kids. And maybe one or two for us too."

"Okay. We'll meet back here then? A dinner is planned for the symposium presenters; you are going with me to that, aren't you?"

"Only if I can molest you under the table," she replied, her eyes dancing.

Chuckling, Gil kissed her and then left for the meetings. Catherine collected her purse and a jacket and headed out too.

Gil chose a talk on the improvements in DNA testing and how they applied to Forensics. He was seated and reading the synopsis of the lecture when he felt someone sit next to him. He glanced up to see a face that seemed familiar but it took a second look to realize why..

"Hi," she said as she smiled.

"Hi," he smiled and then glanced back at his paper.

"I'm surprised to see you here."

He looked back at her, confused.

"I mean, I thought you would be at the one about entomology and crime scenes, since that is your field." Her gaze was direct, her eyes seeming to pierce through him.

Gil shrugged. "Yeah, I did a paper with him some years ago. He's good at repeating what other people have researched. Trust me, he won't be revealing any original insights at his talk today."

"Oh. So why didn't you do something on the subject?"

"They didn't ask me too. I've done that topic a couple of times before. Guess they wanted a fresh face."

"Too bad. I would have been interested."

"So what is your specialty, Ms. er ah…"

"Sidle. Sara Sidle. I suppose I haven't been at it long enough to have a specialty. I work for the SFPD."

"Ah…you'll find one. But it is good to know all aspects of the science."

"You do, I'm sure."

"Well, I try to have a working knowledge but I'm certainly not an expert in all areas. Each member of my team brings a unique expertise to a crime scene. Mine just happens to be bugs."

"So, I understand that bugs can be used to determine a time of death?"

"Well, there are limitations but yes…they can be very helpful for that and other evidence. I once used insects to not only determine the time of death within a few hours but also the location of the murder. The body had been moved but when I processed the larvae and beetles that were present, I was able to identify the place of the murder."

"Really?" Gil nodded. Then she began talking again. "I've read some of your articles. That's why I came to this conference…when I saw you were speaking, I mean."

"Oh, well…thank you. I hope you weren't disappointed?"

"Well…no, I wasn't. You did seem a little distracted at first but I found your presentation…very interesting." Gil sat, thinking about the distraction while she launched into another set of questions. Finally, the session began and both concentrated on the speaker. Gil glanced around briefly, wondering if he had brought his own distraction to the conference.

Once the session was over, Gil was preparing to leave. He had spotted a sandwich shop on his way over and thought he might get a quick bite to eat before the afternoon session. He turned to walk out but was blocked by Sara Sidle.

"How about a cup of coffee or something?" she asked.

Something about the way she looked at him made Gil uncomfortable. "I …uh…"

"I thought this presentation had some interesting points. I wanted to ask you about them."

Looking into her hope filled eyes, Gil decided that he could share his lunch break with her. After all, she was a student of the science.

They made their way to the shop he had spotted and after ordering lunch, sat at a table near the window. She asked her questions and he offered insights. He found it to be a mentally stimulating conversation. They walked back for the afternoon sessions.

Gil was in his place behind the podium, arranging his papers as people came in. It surprised him when he saw Sara slide into a seat near the front of the room. Briefly he glanced up to the seat Catherine had occupied, smiled to himself, sighed, and then began his presentation.

By the time Gil had finished his session, Catherine was back at the hotel soaking in a warm tub. Gil fielded a few questions and then hurried out, wanting to get back to Catherine. She had been correct that morning when she said their separation would give him time to miss her. She was still in the tub when he got back to their room.

He found her and sat next to the tub, listening to her tell him about her day. It was really very ordinary stuff; she went shopping, found things for the kids, and had a surprise for him later. Well, maybe the last part was a bit more interesting. But right then, Gil wasn't too concerned about her surprise. He just wanted to listen to her talk, wash her back, and relish time alone with her.

When she finally wound down and got quiet, he tilted his head and smiled at her. "You were right, you know."

"I was? About what?"

"I missed you…all day. I missed having you in my space," he told her.

She smiled at him warmly. "You know, I think that is one of the sweetest things you've ever said to me."

"I meant it. The presentation this morning was interesting and that Sidle girl was there and was asking me all kinds of questions. And then we ate lunch together and she asked more questions. It was quite a stimulating conversation. And then had my last presentation this afternoon and I looked up and you weren't there. I had been missing you all along and then when you weren't there…I missed you more."

Looking at him and listening to the tone of his voice, Catherine knew that he had indeed missed her. But what he had said about the Sidle girl caught her attention. "The Sidle girl?"

"Yeah, the brunette that was sitting in front of you yesterday…her name is Sara Sidle."

Catherine remembered the girl. She also remembered the way that girl looked at Gil. _And now she is having lunch with him? _Catherine's eyes narrowed as she went into tigress mode. That girl was making a move on her husband and Catherine was determined to protect her territory.

"You had lunch with her?"

"Yeah. She was at the session this morning and had questions…so we ate and she asked questions."

Catherine studied his response. It was clear to her that once again, Gil was clueless. He had no inkling of that girl's interest in him. "Gil…does she know you are married?"

Shrugging he answered. "I suppose so, I mean, you were there yesterday."

"Yeah, but no one knew who I am."

"True…but it doesn't really matter…whether she knows I am married or not. I know I am married….and to the most beautiful woman on the planet too." He was smiling at her, oblivious to the undercurrents Sara Sidle was creating.

GILISSOINTROUBLEGILISSOINTROUBLE!

Still doing okay? You like it? Wanna find out what happens next? You know what to do:-)


	31. Chapter 31

They attended the dinner that night and were seated at a table that included a criminalist from Dallas that Gil had met years before and who had recommended Nick Stokes to Gil

They attended the dinner that night and were seated at a table that included a criminalist from Dallas that Gil had met years before and who had recommended Nick Stokes to Gil. The two men chatted while Catherine visited with his wife. The couple knew the Stokes family well and Catherine picked up some interesting tidbits to tease their Nicky with when they got back to Vegas. She watched as Gil and Dr. Meyers chatted and enjoyed watching Gil; he was animated, entertaining his counterpart with a story. "Yeah, we opened they guy up and a snake came slithering out," concluded Gil, making the two women flinch.

After the dinner, they headed back to the hotel. As they walked through the lobby, Gil grabbed her hand and pulled her into the bar. "They have live music," he told her. A small jazz ensemble was playing and they sat listening for a few minutes, ordering drinks. Gil surprised Catherine by asking her to dance with him.

"They don't exactly have a dance floor," she said.

"Don't need one…when I'm with you, I'm dancing on clouds anyway." And so they found a small area between the tables and danced.

Once they made it to their room, Catherine slipped some items out of one of her shopping bags. "Here," she said handing one of the items to him, "You slip this on while I go in the bathroom and change."

He watched her disappear behind the bathroom door and then examined the item. An eyebrow shot up as he discerned what the front was and what the back was. There was so little fabric, that Gil wondered what the point of wearing it was anyway. Finally he shrugged his shoulders and undressed. Deciding that the rewards would be worth his momentary discomfort, he slipped into the thong and waited for her on the bed.

A few minutes later Catherine stepped out in an outfit that had his full attention. His eyes travelled down and then made their way back up the thigh high hose that fastened to a lace garter belt. Again she wore nothing underneath. But his eyes didn't stop there. They travelled up to her matching see thru lace bra. The ensemble was covered by a robe that hid nothing.

She eyed him in his little outfit and her eyes sparkled as she noted his reaction to her. Humming softly she began to dance for him, moving slowly across the floor towards him until she was performing a lap dance far beyond anything she had done as a stripper. The thong was becoming impossibly uncomfortable on Gil and he began to squirm. Catherine guessed the reason for his activity and divested him of the offending material. By the time her dance was completed, she had lowered herself over him and he was firmly sheathed in her womanhood.

A couple of hours later, Catherine lay, listening to her husband's soft snores. _No way will he be thinking about Ms. Sidle tomorrow. He'll be too tired and too sore…_

The next morning they went to the last sessions of the conference. Catherine saw the brunette eyeing Gil from across the room. During the fifteen minute break, they stood in the hall way discussing the presentation. Seeing Sara Sidle approaching, Catherine looked at Gil and pretended to be wiping something from his cheek. Her demeanor was intentionally possessive.

"Good morning," the younger woman said to Gil.

"Oh, good morning," he responded. "Sara, have you met Catherine?"

"No, I haven't." Sara's smile was superficial at best.

"Catherine, this is Sara Sidle that I was telling you about yesterday." Gil was trying to be polite. Catherine was once again amused by her husband's cluelessness, however. He still hadn't introduced her as his wife.

The trio stood talking for a minute and then someone pulled Gil away to answer a question, leaving the two women together. Catherine decided to see exactly what this woman was up to. "So Sara, Gil tells me that you are working here in San Francisco?"

"Ah, yeah. His presentation yesterday was fascinating. I really enjoyed it."

"Hmmm, I'll bet you did."

Sara was curious about the woman that had been so familiar with Dr. Grissom. "So have you known him long?"

"Oh, a few years…ever since I started at the lab in Vegas. He trained me."

"Wow, I'll bet that was exciting. So…you two work together?"

"Ah…yeah. All the time."

"Working with him… that has to be amazing?"

Catherine smirked. "Oh, he's amazing alright."

Gil returned to the women. "Catherine was just telling me how you two work together," said Sara.

Knowing that he was missing something important but not understanding what, he glanced at Catherine for a clue; but all she did was smile that innocent smile that she got when she was up to something. "Ah, yeah. Catherine is one of the top blood spatter analysts in the country," he stated proudly.

"She said you trained her?"

"Crime scene processing; but the blood spatter expertise is all hers."

They headed back into the room for the rest of the session. Catherine glanced over at Sara several times, noticing that the brunette was watching Gil. _She's not getting anywhere near my man again_, thought the red head.

Gil surprised Catherine at the end of the session however, and invited Sara to have lunch with them. Consequently, she found herself seated at a table across from the gap toothed novice. _Bitch better quite looking at Gil like that, _she thought.

Sara asked a lot of questions, too many in Catherine's view. Gil, fully into his professor mode, patiently answered each one. The two women spent the time sizing each other up. Catherine was startled out of her game of eye darts by the ringing of her cell phone. Answering, she was surprised to hear Erin on the other end.

"Erin? What's wrong?"

Gil eyes went to his wife immediately, concern filling his face.

"Lindsey did what?"

"No…well, is John okay?"

Yeah…ummm… well, we'll be back tonight."

"Yeah, you did the right thing Erin. Just …yeah, no t.v. or anything this afternoon for Lindsey. And John's okay now, you're sure?"

"Okay….yeah, thanks Erin." She hung up and sighed. Gil was looking at her with a questioning stare. "Everything's fine. Lindsey got mad at John because there was a show she wanted to watch and he was watching the Discovery Channel. She threw the remote at him and hit him in the head. Erin says he has a lump on his head and he cried a long time but he seems okay now."

Gil nodded, relieved that nothing too serious had happened. Catherine glanced at Sara who was trying to follow. "Erin's the nanny," she said as if that explained everything. Sara shrugged and nodded and then finished her tea.

As they finished, Gil handed Sara one of his business cards. "If you're ever in Vegas," he offered, "we'll give you a tour of the lab."

Catherine smirked as the younger woman hugged the card to her like a treasure. "Thanks," Sara said. "I might take you up on that someday."

"Great…" Catherine drawled between clench teeth. Then turning to Gil, "I suppose we should get going of we are going to catch our flight."

Gil nodded and said, "Sara, we enjoyed meeting you. Perhaps we'll see you at another one of these conferences sometime."

"Yeah, I hope so," she answered giving Catherine a look that said drop dead.

Gil caught the look and frowned. Catherine smiled pleasantly. "Okay Gil…we need to go. Have to get home so you can have a talk with your daughter about throwing things," Catherine declared. The stunned look on Sara's face sent waves of satisfaction through Catherine. Gil unwittingly added to the spice when he responded. "We'll have a little time at the hotel before we leave, dear." His expression left no doubt in anyone's mind about what he intended to do with the time.

Catherine had other thoughts about their last couple of hours at the hotel. She fumed all the way back. As soon as they reached their room and the door had closed behind them she let her frustration out. "Gil, why did you invite her to lunch with us?" she snarled.

He looked at his wife wondering what he had done wrong. "She's so full of questions, Catherine. I just wanted to encourage her."

"Well…I just wanted to have lunch alone with my husband. And as for encouraging her, oh you did that alright. Can't you tell she has a thing for you?"

Looking at his wife's angry face, Gil knew he had screwed up and that probably meant that they weren't going to have one last go before leaving San Francisco. His mind raced as he tried to find a solution and salvage the situation. "Cath, I'm sorry. I wasn't thinking…"

"I know that, Gil. You were clueless as usual. You stepped right into it. Now, when that girl gets in touch with you…and she will, don't encourage her. You'll only hurt her."

Gil was listening but he was also studying her body language. "Cath as I've told you, I would never…"

"I know you wouldn't go looking for it, Gil. But honestly, you are so clueless sometimes….you'd get all tangled up with a girl like that before you knew what was happening."

"No tangles, I promise," he smirked. And then stepping closer to her, his hands went to her upper arms, caressing. Besides, when I look at another woman all I see is another person. You're the only _woman_ I really notice." He hoped she would understand what he was trying to say.

Tilting her head, her lips found his and captured them in a long, hungry kiss.

_Perfect,_ he thought. _Finally she's kissing me. Must've said the right thing for a change; now if I can just get her to the bed…_

_GILLOVESCATHERINEHEJUSTDOESN'TKNOWITONTHESHOWYET!_

Catfight didn't get as intense as I had planned it but there's always future possibilities, right? Anyway, reviews please. Thank you.


	32. Chapter 32

Once they were back in Vegas, Gil did have a talk with his daughter about throwing things. Lindsey informed him that John watched entirely too much Discovery Channel and someone needed to knock some sense into him. Gil choked back a snicker as he watched the pint sized version of Catherine launch into her diatribe. "Well, next time try talking to him and then get your Mommy or me…or Erin if John won't listen. Okay?"

She sighed as if her small frame was carrying the weight of the world. "Okay Daddy. But he's gotta quit watching that creepy stuff so much. It's just weird."

"Watch it young lady, remember I like to watch that creepy stuff too."

"See? See what it does to you? John's gonna grow up weird." He studied her serious little face and chuckled. "Yeah, wouldn't want John to turn out weird like me…"

Miniature Catherine rolled her eyes, "Too late," she said as she bounced out of the room.

Gil found Catherine in the kitchen, preparing what was becoming an endless meal. With four kids and three, sometimes four adults in their house, someone was always hungry. "Hey, how'd you little talk go?" she asked him as he picked up a carrot to munch on.

"Oh it was one of those special father/daughter moments you hear about." The amusement in his voice caught her attention.

"A special moment?"

"I got called weird…." He said as he bit off more carrot.

"You are not weird."

Gil looked at her as he chewed his carrot. She was amused by the mirth in his expression. He swallowed and then edged up to her, wrapping his arms around her. "So what am I then?"

"Eccentric."

"Another word for weird," he said as he nuzzled into her neck.

"Yeah, but it's sexier than weird."

"Sexy? You think I'm sexy?"

"Sexy, adorable, exciting, charming, delectable…"

"You forgot horny."

"It's always the quiet ones, isn't it?"

"Man would have to be dead to not be horny with you around."

"I forgot romantic…."

Their kiss was passionate and threatening to lead to something more when a whimper was heard from the doorway. "Mommy," cried John. "Tummy hurts…"

Gil picked up his younger son and immediately turned to Catherine. "He's hot, I think he has a fever."

Catherine touched his face. "Honey, where does your tummy hurt?"

John put his hand on his throat and then rested his head on Gil's shoulder.

"Call the doctor," Gil said. "He's burning up and strep throat is going around."

They left ten minutes later, confident that Erin was watching the other children. John did have strep throat. Gil and Catherine took turns reading to him and keeping an eye on him while he slept. They did the best to keep the others away from him and sanitize everything that he came into contact with. The doctor had prescribed antibiotics and within a couple of days, John was better.

About a month after they had returned from their trip, Gil did, as Catherine had predicted, receive an e-mail from Sara Sidle. She was working on a case and asked him some general questions about procedure and process. He answered her questions and thought nothing more about it…until a week later when he received another one.

"Heard from Sara Sidle," he told Catherine as they cleaned up after supper. "She had some questions."

"Yeah, I'll bet she did." Catherine was irritated. "You didn't answer her, did you?"

"Just answered her questions…nothing else."

Her irritation was deepening. "You what? Gil, I thought we talked about this…"

"It seemed rude to not answer…but then she sent another e-mail."

"Dammit Gil!"

"Honey…" he started to hug her but she shook him off and left the room. _Uh oh, she's really pissed. _

He found her in the bedroom. Watching her move around the room, putting away laundry and selecting her nightclothes, he marveled once again that this beautiful creature loved him. "Cath?"

"Just…just…don't talk, Gil. I don't want to hear it. I told you what is going on with that girl and you ignored me."

"Honey…it doesn't matter what is going on with her. I…"

"I told you, I don't want to hear it."

Crushed, he walked out of the room and headed for his study. He was attempting to read a forensics journal when she came in, dressed in the outfit from San Francisco.

She opened her mouth to say something but the words were blocked by his lips on hers. "I'm sorry," he said as he broke the kiss. "I…"

"No, I'm being…I dunno…overreacting."

"You know I love you…you know how much I love you, don't you?"

Her eyes sparkled as she took his hand. "Why don't you come show me?" she said suggestively.

An hour later as he held her, relishing the post love making euphoria, he was struck with an insight. _Whenever Sara Sidle gets mentioned, Cath gets angry but then I get some terrific sex. Maybe I should bring her up more often._

One month and two Sidle e-mails later, Gil came home to find an agitated Catherine. "Where are the kids?" he asked.

"Erin took them to the park." He could tell by her tone that she was upset.

"Catherine, what's wrong?"

"What's wrong?" She looked incredulous.

"You're upset. I promise, I haven't returned Sara's last e-mail." He thought that might be the problem. He had used the Sara e-mails to trigger some fantastic sex but he knew that the trick had run its course. Consequently, he also wasn't as responsive to Sara's e-mails.

"Sara's e-mail? What?"

"I just thought that…" he looked confused now. Then he saw a tear trickle down her cheek and he tried to hug her. She stepped away though; leaving him wondering what he had done that was so bad.

"Cath?"

"Damn you, Gil Grissom. Damn you and your little swimmers!" The tears were flowing now.

Still confused, he approached her again. "What? Why are you crying?"

"I'm pregnant, Gil. Because of your damned swimmers, I'm going to get all fat again."

"You…you're pregnant?" he said, stunned. "I thought …"

"Nothing is 100 per cent, Gil. And I did the math; it happened in San Francisco. I'm never going on a trip with you again."

_Hormones,_ thought Gil. "Cath, you…we're gong to have another baby." He was smiling now.

She looked at him, his happy expression. "You're happy about this?"

"I…" he was befuddled now. What was the best response? Did she want this or not? Finally, he decided to go with his feelings. His hands cupped her cheeks as he gazed into her eyes. "I'm not sure what you want me to say, dear. But I love our children and I love making babies with you."

"But I'll get so fat…and…you…you won't want me anymore." She sniffled.

_Yeah, hormones. _"Honey, you are so beautiful when you are pregnant." He put his hand over her stomach. "And that's our baby growing in there…a part of us, our love. How could I not want you? Don't ever think that. I love you; I'll always love you."

Sniffling, she caught her breath. "But now…there's that Sidle woman…."

"She's nothing to me. An interesting student and that's all; while you, my dearest, are everything to me. Besides, I like what pregnancy does to your body."

"You like me fat?" she blurted in disbelief.

"I like all the interesting curves…and what it does to your tits…"

"What it does? What does it do…for you anyway?"

"They get so…full…and the color changes a little, gets darker. And I really enjoy helping you toughen them up for nursing. And your tummy gets round and when my hand is over it, sometimes…it's like I can feel the baby breathing in there. I know it's not real, but I feel connected. A…a part of me is growing inside of you; I can't explain how that makes me feel, Cath. But…even if there were no other reasons, then that alone would make me love you. There could never be anyone else for me…not when we first met and certainly not now."

"Okay, maybe I will go on other trips with you." She smiled as she nestled into him.

"Honey?"

"Mmmm?"

"If you really don't want anymore children, after this one, I mean; I could…you know, I could make sure."

"Is that what you want?" She asked as she looked up into his eyes.

"I want you to be happy and to feel safe and content. We thought we were doing what is necessary to stop at four, but it didn't work. Its okay with me, I love your babies. But I don't have to go through all the stuff…you know, body changes…hormones… carrying around a bowling ball the time…If you want to stop with this one, I mean for sure…I can at least take care of that part of it. You suffer the having babies task, I can endure the not having them one."

"Let's wait to make that decision. We can decide after this one is born. I don't want crazy hormones deciding for us."

"Okay." His hand went to her stomach again. "We have another little one, dear."

Her hands covered his and squeezed. "Yes, we do. And we need a bigger house."

"I'll call the realtor tomorrow," he smiled. He glanced at the clock. "How long are they going to be at the park?"

A coy grin broke across her face. "We have time…if you make it fast."

"Oh baby, going fast is never a problem…it's trying to slow down with you that is difficult."

PUREJOYPUREJOYPUREJOYPUREJOY

Thanks to all who review! Thank you, thank you thank you. As much fun as I have with my fantasies, it is nice to know others enjoy them too:-)


	33. Chapter 33

A few weeks later, Gil came home to find Catherine sitting in her gazebo drinking her morning juice, and staring at the flowers; she seemed gloomy. He approached her, wondering what was causing her mood. "Are you going to regret that in a few minutes?" he asked pointing at the juice. Her morning sickness was rampant and mornings were not good these days. Luckily the queasiness usually faded and she could still enjoy her afternoons.

She smiled weakly. "Probably, but I was craving some. Erin okay in there with the kids?"

Gil sat beside her. "Erin's fine. How are you?"

"Can we take this with us when we move?"

"This one is sunk in the ground. I'll build a new one…first thing." _Is that what she's so sad about?_

"Oh, I was kind of hoping for this one…" her thoughts drifted off and Gil wondered where.

"I'll talk to the moving people but I'm afraid it would be too expensive. But I'll try since it is important to you." He sat, watching her, and realized his words had barely registered.

"Honey, you okay?"

"Just thinking…"

"About what?"

"Why are we doing this?"

"Doing what?"

"Bringing babies into this messed up world. You and I both know all the things that go on that never get reported on the news. The entire population would be depressed if it did…but we know. And we're bringing children into it "

Gil thought about her worry and structured a response. "Honey…children are hope. Even in the midst of genocide in Africa people have babies, hoping for a better tomorrow. And since we know what is out there, we are better prepared to protect them from it. Besides, one of our kids is going to be President one day and solve all the problems, with the help of his or her siblings, who will be great scientists, philosophers…well, you get the picture." He grinned, trying to lighten her mood.

"Yeah…more like one will grow up to be a rock star and go trippin' on drugs every night while the others become Hollywood stars, politicians, and well…_you_ get the picture."

Gil grimaced. "None of my children is allowed to become a politician…I'll haunt them from my grave if that happens."

She snickered and Gil relaxed. She was coming out of the darkness. "What got you in such a mood, my love?"

""Mrs. Weinstein down the street; she asked if we could check on her cats everyday. She's going to Tucson. Her son was murdered yesterday…her only child."

Gil hugged her and held onto her firmly. "Oh."

After a few minutes, she pulled away. "You hungry?"

A devilish grin broke at the corners of his mouth "Depends on what's cooking."

She looked at him, one side of her mouth angling up in a wicked smirk. "You've caused enough trouble with that line of thinking, don't you think?"

"That's the beauty of it…I can't get you pregnant, can I?"

"I should go along with your dirty mind here and then laugh when you get baptized with the consequences of your lecherousness."

"Dirty mind?" he laughed. "Well, I suppose an argument could be made for that."

"When's the last time you were at Confession anyway? The way your mind is working, you'll take up half the priest's day."

"Oh, what I've been thinking along those lines doesn't have to be confessed since we got married. But I still haven't owned up to my thoughts about you _before_ we were married."

"Oh…and what were those thoughts? Or dare I ask?"

"I think you can guess, Mrs. Grissom. You're a pretty smart lady, you can figure it out."

She gazed at him, her blue eyes sparkling now. "You know…after all these years and four, almost five babies, it still thrills me to be called that."

"Called what?"

"Mrs. Grissom."

"Hmmm, I'll have to remember that…in bed," he muttered as his lips approached hers.

"Lindsey!" John shrieked from inside the house. Then they heard a smack and a yell. "John!" She squealed. And then there was crying.

Gil and Catherine looked at one another and smiled. "Erin is in there," he reminded her.

"But they are _our_ children," she smiled back.

He stood up, took her hand, and they walked into the house, ready to do battle.

Lindsey was sitting on the couch, holding the side of her face and whimpering. John was standing in the middle of the room and crying. Gil, the younger, sat against the wall, laughing. Erin had come down the hall, holding Caitlyn. All three adults entered the scene at the same time.

"Mommy," cried John, "Linsey hitted me." He ran straight to Catherine. As Gil watched him, he heard Lindsey. "Daddy, John punched me…" Gil went to the couch and sat. "And then he slapped me," she finished.

Catherine looked across at the laughing Gil next to the wall. "Gil, did you see what happened?"

"John punched Lindsey in the back, she hit him, and then he slapped her."

"I didn't punch her…" John whimpered. "I jus slapped her…"

"Did too," yelled Lindsey.

"Did not," John said quietly as he buried his head on his mother's shoulder.

The elder Gil noticed that the younger Gil was gleefully watching the exchange. "Gil, what _really_ happened? Remember, Son, your mother and I are criminalists. We will get to the truth. The evidence never lies."

Young Gil wasn't sure what 'evidence' meant, but from the expression on his father's face, he knew it was time to 'fess up. "I punched Lindsey and the jumped back so she thought John did it."

"Thank you for that, Gil. I would much rather hear it from you than find out some other way. You know that was wrong, don't you?"

The boy hung his head, looking mournful. "Yes."

Then Gil turned to Lindsey. "And you, young lady…you know that hitting John was wrong?"

"But he hit me!"

"No, he didn't. And your assumption led to an innocent person being hurt. But even if he had hit you, hitting back is not the best solution." The looking across at John, Gil continued. "And John, hitting Lindsey was not right either." He remained quiet for a minute, gazing at his wife when a solution settled in his mind. "Okay, so hitting is not the answer to our problems…and Gil was defiantly wrong to start the whole episode. So, you will all spend the rest of your morning in your rooms thinking about what happened and how you can handle it better next time something like this happens. Mommy and I will tell you when you can come out. No one leaves their room before we say. So go to the bathroom now and then to your rooms."

They walked down the hall quietly, except John who was still sniffling. Each took a turn in the bathroom and within minutes, all were in their rooms.

Gil turned to Erin. "That should make your morning easier," he smiled. "I need a nap and Mrs. Grissom isn't feeling well, so we're going to our room. Call us if you need us."

Erin nodded, a knowing grin on her face…too knowing for Gil's comfort, but he didn't want to think about that. He took his wife's hand and they disappeared into their room.

"Gil?"

"Hmmmm?" He muttered as he brushed his teeth.

"Do you think you were talking a little over their heads?" She was chuckling.

"Good, it'll take them longer to think it through."

Now she laughed. "You really believe they are thinking about any of it? Honey, they are in their rooms with their toys. Not much thinking is going on."

"He emerged from the bathroom, his eyes setting on Catherine. "That's okay. They are quiet. And I'm thinking plenty….there's this beautiful woman sitting on my bed and I'm thinking about what to do with that."

"Oh honey," she started in a coquettish tone, her eyes teasing him, "If you don't know by now then things really are hopeless."

He sat next to her, still gazing at her. "Let's see…if I remember correctly from our last session…." He lost himself in the taste of her lips and the feel of her body next to his. She responded with equal fire. Morning sickness, children, and the world's evils faded from her mind as she entered an erotic fog with him. Sometime later, satisfied and spent, they emerged from the fog as their senses cooled. Gil glanced at the clock. "We have another hour before we let them out of jail."

"Hmmm, good, I just want to curl up with you and keep this moment."

He pulled her into him, spooning around her form, and held her closely. "I love you, Mrs. Grissom."

"I know," she said in a contented whisper.

/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/

You know the drill. The little button is down there somewhere.


	34. Chapter 34

That night Gil was investigating a homicide. He and Detective O'Brien were interrogating a suspect. Gil had been uneasy since he had entered the room and sat across the table from the man. There was something that was truly evil about the guy and Gil wanted to wrap things up and get away from him. His unease multiplied when Catherine slipped into the room, handing him a folder with the last bit of evidence they needed to condemn the man. She turned to leave as he glanced down at the contents of the folder, a DNA analysis proving that his semen was present on the victim. He had raped and then murdered her.

He heard a chair scraping the floor and looked up to see the suspect rising from his seat and grabbing the chair. He flung it across the room at the guard but it missed and hit Catherine instead, knocking her to the floor. O'Brien and the guard charged the suspect, leaving Gil to decide if they needed his help or if he could go to Catherine. He decided she needed him more.

He knelt on the floor beside her and saw blood. His stomach was rising in his throat and his heart was pounding. He started yelling, not sure what he was saying, but calling for help. He reached toward her head and found the gash left by the impact of the chair. Her eyes were open but she looked dazed. "Cath?" he choked out. "Honey?"

Her eyelashes fluttered and she tried to lift her head. A moan escaped and her head fell back to the floor. Gil was in a full panic by this time. He heard other officers run into the room as the scuffle continued across from them. Slipping out of his jacket, he rolled it and slid it under her head, carefully lifting her and hoping it didn't hurt. Her head was still bleeding. Frantically he looked around for something to use over the wound while he tried to compress it and slow the bleeding. Finding nothing, he put his hand over it, keeping pressure on it as tight as he dared.

Just then the suspect broke lose and charged for the door, which was behind Gil and Catherine. He ran into Gil, knocking him into Catherine. The suspect tripped, his knee thumping into her side as he feel over her. The officers chased him and they all fell into the wall, still grappling. Finally they managed to restrain him and three officers drug him from the room.

Gil was checking Catherine. She was unconscious. "Where the hell are the paramedics?" he yelled. O'Brien stumbled over to them and took one look at Catherine. Heading out the door, he started yelling for somebody to get them here now and "where is the damned first aid kit?"

The EMTs arrived quickly and went to work. Gil watched in fear. "She's pregnant and the guy kneed her in the side," he told them. "And she's been bleeding for several minutes"

Just then Jim Brass walked in. He stood at the door, taking in the scene. "Damn," was all he could manage to say. As the medics loaded Catherine on a gurney, Jim looked at Gil. Deciding he was in no shape to drive, Jim told his friend to ride with him. They followed the ambulance to Desert Palm Hospital where Catherine was admitted immediately. Gil paced the hallway outside the exam room, his heart pounding and his ears thumping, his mind beyond any reasonable thoughts. Jim sat in a chair nearby, watching his friend agonize, swallowing his own concern.

Eventually the doctor came out and asked which of them her husband was. Jim pointed to Gil, who was mutely stepping closer to him, his eyes full of questions. The doctor took a deep breath and then began. "She has a slight concussion, nothing serious and we had to stitch the gash, but other than a headache and a brutal looking black eye that should be all fine in a day or two. We did an ultrasound to check on the babies and everything looks okay there. I do want her to see her regular OB tomorrow though, just to keep an eye on things. I can keep her here overnight but she would probably rest better at home. But Mr. Grissom, I do mean rest. She says you have four children. For tonight, she doesn't have any, understood?"

"Yes, understood. But…did you say …babies?" Gil looked totally confused and a little aghast.

"Yes, I did. Your wife is carrying twins. She said that was news to her also. I'm sure there will be plenty to talk about with her OB tomorrow."

"Yeah…news," he mumbled. He stood frozen in the hallway after the doctor walked away. Jim was amused by his friend's reaction to the news of twins. He walked over to Gil, put his hand on his shoulder, and chuckling said, "Congratulations, big guy. Didn't think you had it in you. But then, you two do act like rabbits…"

Gil turned to Jim, still stunned. "Huh?"

"Go see your wife, Daddy Rabbit." Jim smirked as he gave his friend a gentle shove in the direction of the room. Gil shuffled in, still dazed.

Once inside, he looked at Catherine, who was smiling at him. "Twins?" he squeaked out.

"Twins," she said more confidently. "Those damned swimmers of yours…"

He walked to her and gently touched her face, careful not to hurt her. His eyes sparkled as he saw for himself that she was indeed, alright. "Two babies?"

"A BOGO," she smiled.

"What?" he asked perplexed.

"Buy one, get one free."

"Somehow I doubt that. Everything will just be twice as expensive. But we'll manage."

"Can I go home or is the doctor going to make me stay?"

"He said you can go home but total rest…no kid stuff. Promise?"

"I promise. I just want to curl up with you in our bed and plan for our twins."

"We'll plan tomorrow. Tonight you rest."

"Okay, I'll behave. But that means you have to behave too."

"I think I can manage that for one night," he grinned.

Jim drove them home and helped Gil get Catherine into the house. He disappeared quickly, promising to see that Gil's car made it home the next day. Once she was in bed, Gil brought her some water and an ice pack. "Nurse said this is all you get. Being pregnant severely limits painkillers and they don't want to give you anything in case that guy's knee caused a problem they couldn't see. Meds could make it worse."

"Not even aspirin?"

"Especially not aspirin. You know that, honey."

"Yeah…guess I do. Okay. Ice pack it is." She held it gingerly over her wound and settled into the pillow. "You beside me would help," she suggested.

"I'm coming in a minute. Just want to check the house. I'll be right back." Gil walked into the hall and through the house, checking the doors. Once back in the kitchen, he leaned into the wall, sucked in a deep breath, and sighed as a tear rolled down his cheek. Seeing her on the floor had scared him, more than he realized at the moment. But now his mind was working and he knew how bad it could have been. Now he was really scared. She could have lost the baby…no, babies and that would have been devastating. But worse, he could have lost her. And then, he knew, he would have been lost too. He willed his emotions back into line, pushing down his fear and reminding himself that she was okay and the babies were too. Then sighing one last deep sigh, he straightened up and headed back to her. She needed him to hold her, almost as much as he needed to do it.

/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\

Okay, a little bit of drama...stay tuned for more:-) Meantime, keep feeding the review monster, please.


	35. Chapter 35

A trip to her OB the next day reassured both Catherine and Gil that their babies were oaky. Dr. Morris was concerned with the next aspect of her pregnancy. "Catherine," she began, "you've delivered four babies in less than five years and now you are pregnant again. That concerns me. Now you are carrying twins. That really concerns me. You must take it easy. If there is any way you can rake time off from work, do it. If you have to work, cut back to part time. And when you are home, you need to rest. I want those feet up and Gil," she said turning to him, "she is a queen for the next six months. You understand what I mean?"

Gil was too worried to argue. "What…I know that this many pregnancies so close together is hard on a woman, but what…why…" he couldn't bring himself to ask the question.

"Why am I so concerned? Why could this be dangerous?" Dr. Morris verbalized his unformed thoughts. "You are right, this is very hard on a woman and twins make it even more difficult. Catherine's body still hasn't completely recovered from Caitlyn. Now it is expected to provide sustenance for her and two more babies, not to mention all the added stress to her heart and to her kidneys and urinary tract. I'm very serious about rest." Turning back to Catherine, "You can never get enough rest, Catherine."

"Consider us duly informed Dr. and I am listening if even Catherine doesn't. She will rest. We have a nanny to help with the kids and I'm sure her mother and sister will help too. And when I'm not at work, I'll do my part too. I'll chain her to the bed if I have to."

He smiled but Catherine saw that he was serious.

"You don't have to do that, Gil. I'm listening. Besides, I've always wanted to be a queen," she said while assuming a regal pose.

The doctor gave them some pamphlets about multiple births and also a list of websites and contact information for a local multiples support group. "Having two at one time is different," the doctor said. "You think you've handle babies before, but handling two newborns…well, the difficulties become exponential. I'm sure you can do it but you need support."

They thanked the doctor and Gil made Catherine wait while he went to the parking lot to get the car. He drove to the door and helped her climb in. "Your carriage awaits, your majesty," he smiled as he kissed her hand.

"Oooo, I think I could get used to this queen thing," she smiled back at him.

That night, Gil gathered the older three children together and took them into the bedroom where they had a family meeting on the bed with Catherine. "Okay kids," he began. "Mommy's doctor said that she has two babies in her tummy…not one like when each of you was in Mommy's tummy. That means Mommy needs to rest a lot because her body has to work so hard to take care of two babies. We all need to help Mommy, okay?"

Lindsey looked at her mother's stomach. "There's two babies?" she squealed.

"Yes honey," Catherine smiled.

"They must be teenie tiny."

"Well, they are now but they will get bigger. But when they are born, they will still be tiny."

Young Gil seemed deep in thought. "How'd they get in there?" he asked.

Catherine started laughing as she looked at Gil's expression. None of the children had asked that question before. He looked at her for help but she just snickered. "Yeah Daddy," she chuckled, "how'd they get in there?"

The children looked from one parent to the other and giggled. They sensed their father's embarrassment but their mother thought it was funny, so of course they did too. Finally they looked at Gil, waiting for an answer.

"Well…uh…you know when two people really, really love one another it makes a special bond between them. And ..Daddy loves Mommy very, very much. And Mommy loves Daddy too. And sometimes, when you love a person that much and you create that bond, well…the love is so special and so strong that it creates a life of its own, a baby. And the mommy gets to keep the baby inside until the baby is strong enough to come out. And then the baby grows and grows, just like you kids are growing."

"Wow," said little Gil. "You must've loved on Mommy _a lot_ to make two babies."

Catherine burst out laughing again. "Oh, he did honey. Daddy loved on Mommy a lot. But we want you kids to understand, it is a special kind of love that you save up for someone you will meet when you are older that will be your special someone…like Mommy and Daddy are special for each other."

"So I can't get preganant if Gil or John loves on me?" asked Lindsey.

"No baby, your brothers can hug you til they squeeze you and you can't breathe and you won't get pregnant."

"Okay," she grinned.

"Any more questions?" Gil asked, relieved to be done with that one.

It was John, sitting quietly and studying his mother that came up with the next one. His brows were furrowed and he wore the same contemplative expression that his father so often wore. "How do it get out?" his little high pitched toddler voice asked, sounding perplexed.

Gil looked at Catherine and this time it was his turn to snicker. "Sounds like a 'mommy question' to me," he said.

She shot him a look that told him he would pay later. "Well honey," she began, "Mommies have a special tunnel that the baby goes through when it is time to come out. It goes from the womb, that's where the baby stays when it is inside, and runs down to where Mommy's private parts are. Then after the baby is born, that area just goes back to being plain ole private parts."

"Oh," John said thoughtfully. The other two looked grossed out, Catherine thought. _Good maybe they won't ask any more questions._

"So kids, you're going to help Mommy by being quiet when she is resting and by getting things for her and helping when she asks for it?" Gil asked his children.

"Yeah," they agreed.

"Okay, well.. It's time for bed now. Lindsey, you and Gil go get changed. I'll help John. Then we'll meet back here for one bedtime story and then everybody goes to bed."

They hustled off with Gil following behind. Catherine watched as the scampered off the bed and out of the room and smiled. _Gil and I do make wonderful babies, _she thought as she heard them in the hall.

Once the story was read and Gil had made sure they were all settled in for the night, he came back to Catherine. "Honey, I have to go in early tonight. Swing is overloaded. I'll talk with Cavallo and tell him what's going on and let him know that you will be cutting back and might have to take a leave. I'm also going to tell him that I can't work backup anymore until the babies are born."

"You sure you don't want to wait and let me talk to him?"

"I'm sure. It's my job to take care of you. I can handle Cavallo. I can't handle anything happening to you…or to those little babies." He kissed her and headed out, stopping to let Erin know he was leaving and she was on call.

/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/

Okay...more? A littel more? Lots more? Give it up? Let me know what you think, please. I do so appreciate al the wonderful and supportive comments!


	36. Chapter 36

Gil helped the Swing guys finish a case they were working and then sat at his desk, completing a report from his own case from two nights ago. He was deep in thought when his computer beeped, alerting him to an e-mail. Glancing over at the screen, he saw that it was from Sara Sidle.

Gil turned his full attention to the screen and read the subject line, 'found bugs in a body.' He sighed deeply. Was she trying to share an interesting case or did she have questions that might help solve one? Finally he decided to open the mail and find out. He read the short piece and realized she was just sharing the case because she thought he might find it interesting. To be honest, it was pretty basic entomology and not really all that fascinating to him anymore. Staring at the screen, he debated about a response. The last thing he wanted was for Catherine to be upset about anything; and he knew that if he responded, she would find out. _Hell, at some point I'll end up spilling the beans myself._

He looked up over the screen, still thinking and saw Jim Brass standing on the other side of his desk. "How long you been there?" he asked.

"Long enough to know you are about to get yourself in trouble."

"What?" Gil looked at him surprised.

"I don't know who the e-mail is from, but I can tell by your expression that its trouble."

"It's from Sara Sidle."

"Ahhh, the girl from the conference."

"Yeah, the one Catherine is so jealous of, although I don't understand why."

"Don't you? The girl is young, smart, pretty, and after you. Catherine is smart enough to understand the lure of that package."

"Yeah…but I like Catherine's package more." Gil blurted it out before thinking.

Jim snickered. "Man, I can't believe you just said that."

Gil groaned. "Yeah, well if you tell her, I'll be sure something icky gets on that new suit of yours at the next crime scene."

"I would think she's like hearing that you said it." Jim was teasing his friend now and Gil understood it.

"I'll tell her myself, thank you."

"So you gonna answer the e-mail?"

"I don't know. Last thing Catherine needs is to get upset about something…anything. And Sara seems to upset her. But it seems rude not to respond."

"So wait a few days. That's the ticket, wait a few days to respond to each e-mail. Then maybe the girl will get the hint."

"Yeah, but Catherine will go postal if she gets wind that there are any e-mails at all."

"True. Catherine getting upset is scary enough. But a pregnant Catherine with all those hormones…yikes."

"It's not just that, Jim. She's carrying twins and the doctor is worried. She has to cut back to part time at the very least, maybe take a leave until they are born. The rest of the time, she's supposed to rest. Things are stressful enough without Sara Sidle in the middle of it all."

"So don't answer."

"Yeah, you're right."

Jim left Gil to finish his report. Gil closed the e-mail window without ever responding to Sara's mail. Hopefully after he didn't respond a few times, she'd get the message.

The shift began and he was sent out to one of the casinos on a call. Nick Stokes worked with him that night and he enjoyed the mentor role as they worked together to solve the puzzle. Gil was fond of Nick. The young Texan had such a positive attitude and paid attention, trying to learn everything he could as they went. _One day he'll be a really good CSI_, thought Gil. _He just needs to develop some independence…and to think things through before responding._

They took the evidence they had gathered back to the lab and were processing it when Gil saw A.D. Cavallo in the hallway. Gil darted out, catching the man near his office. Gil asked for a few minutes and Cavallo led him into his office and shut the door. "How's Catherine?" Cavallo asked.

"Ah, that's what I wanted to talk to you about. She's pregnant."

"Again?" smirked the older man. "Gil, you two really need to slow down."

"Right, but…this time it is twins. And the doctor is concerned. She would like Catherine to cut back her hours and possibly later, she might have to take a leave of absence."

"Catherine's made it through the other pregnancies like a trooper?" Cavallo said with concern in his voice.

"But they weren't twins, following behind so many others. I know it will be difficult to arrange the schedules, but …"

Don't worry, Gil. We'll work it out. Have her come by when she comes back to work from the incident last night. She is okay isn't she?"

"She will be. She had a slight concussion and a hell of a headache. Plus we were worried about the effects of the suspect's knee going into her side, but everything looks okay."

"Good. I'm happy to hear that. I know we don't always agree Gil, but I do have a lot of respect for you and for Catherine. Both of you are valuable members of this lab and we all know that you've made the difference for us…with our rating, I mean. I for one, am grateful and I can assure you, I'll see that whatever Catherine needs to do about her job, it will be done."

"Thank you. She loves working here and I know she doesn't want to leave permanently."

"And she won't have to."

The two men shook hands and Gil walked out, relieved. Catherine really did like her job and he had hoped that Cavallo would be willing to be reasonable. In Gil's view, he was going beyond that.

Returning to his own office, he opened a folder that had been left on his desk from Trace. It contained an analysis on some fibers found at the crime scene. He was studying the results when his phone rang.

"Grissom," he said absentmindedly when he picked up. His mind was still on the information in the folder.

"Hi, this is Sara," a young voice said through the receiver.

"Sara?"

"Sidle…San Francisco…the conference?"

"Oh…yeah. Sorry. I was…ah, just reviewing some evidence…"

"So, how are you?"

"Fine." His mind was spinning, trying to think of a way to end this call quickly.

"Did you get my e-mail?"

"Ah…e-mail? Yeah, I think so."

"You must be really busy?"

"Yeah Sara, I am. I have this case…"

"Okay, well…I'll let you go. I'll try again another time."

"Okay. Uh…bye."

"Bye."

He put the receiver down like it was on fire. Brass found him staring at it a few minutes later. "Did it attack you or something?"

"Huh? Oh," he said glancing from the receiver to Jim and then back to the receiver. "She called."

"Who?"

"Sara."

"You hung up on her, didn't you?"

"No. But I didn't encourage her, either."

"Short and sweet?"

"No. Just short," Gil said as if he had been caught with his hand in the cookie jar.

"Better not let Catherine find out," Jim said as he left. _If things were normal with Catherine this could be fun,_ Jim thought to himself as he made his way down the hall to his own office.

Gil headed home as soon as the shift ended and once he knew the kids were situated, he went to share breakfast with Catherine. He sat on the bed next to her as they nibbled from the plate of assorted fruits and toast.

"How was work?" she asked.

"Okay. Nicky and I had a case at the Oasis. It looked like it might be interesting at first, but in the end it was pretty usual stuff…the wife did it."

"What did the husband do to her?"

"Cheated on her with a high priced hooker that worked the lounge."

"And all the CSI men learned a lesson from that?" she said with a twinkle in her eyes.

"Don't know. I already know that lesson." He grinned. "Talked to Cavallo. He said for you to come by when you go back to work and he'll work something out. He was amazingly cooperative."

"Good. I'll do that. Anything else happen?" Her expression told him that she knew there was more.

"Uh…yeah, but you won't like it."

"Try me."

"Just remember, you're supposed to be taking it easy…"

"Gil?"

"I got an e-mail form Sara."

"And?"

"I didn't answer it," he said proudly.

"Good."

"But she called later." He said it in a soft tone, hoping she wouldn't catch it. But she did.

"She what?"

All Gil could think of was 'The Taming of the Shrew.' "Ah…she called."

"And?"

"I said hello?"

"Gil Grissom…"

I told her I was busy; it was a very short call."

Catherine smiled at him. "Good."

Gil liked that she was smiling. It meant he wasn't in trouble. "Honey?"

"Yes."

"You know I love you, don't you? You know that Sara could never mean anything to me, right?"

"Just keep reminding me of that…and yourself!"

"Everyday, dear. Everyday."

/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/

Hmmm, wonder what happens next? The reviews are dwindling so I'm wondering if we've lost interest... BTW, Ihave a new poll on my profile page. Might want to check it out, just for fun. NOt like TPTB will pay attention.


	37. Chapter 37

Catherine returned to work part-time after a week off to recover from her attack. She noticed that everyone was being too nice. They were all watching out for her, not letting her do too much. It infuriated her. Storming into Gil's office, she demanded to know what he had told them.

Looking up from a case file, he looked bemused. "What?"

"What did you tell them? They are all walking around me on eggshells and no one will let me do anything! I don't like this, Gil. You know how much I don't like this…"

Gil leaned back in his chair and smiled, listening to her tirade. When she wound down, he tilted his head and grinned at her. "Finished?"

"Yes," she pouted.

"Okay, I didn't tell anybody anything except Cavallo and Jim. One of them must have told the others."

"Where's Jim?" she asked.

"Uh…I'm not sure," he answered nervously. "I think I saw him headed for the morgue."

"The morgue? Jim never goes to the mor…oh, I see what you are doing. You were going to warn him, weren't you?" She stood across from him, hands oh hips and breathing fire.

"Ah…no?"

"Oh yes you were. You men…"she huffed.

Gil couldn't help it. The sight of her standing there so fired up, face flushed, and the tiny little bump that was his babies just beginning to show combined to set him on fire, a very different fire than the one she was breathing. She saw the expression on his face and knew what he was thinking. "Get that look off of your face right now, buster. You and that lusty glint of yours have caused enough problems."

Gil chuckled. "Or what?"

"What do you mean…or what?"

"Get rid of the look or what?"

"Or…oh, hell. I don't know." She threw up her hands and stormed out. She could hear his chuckle as she exited. Anyone in the hall could have read the smile on her face and the gleam in her eyes. She had Gil Grissom eating out of the palm of her hand and was loving every bit of it.

He had just settled back into his chair and picked up the file when his computer beeped. He glanced over to see that he had received an e-mail. Trying to concentrate on the case, he ignored the computer screen. Consequently, the alert remained on his screen while he continued to work on his case.

After awhile he left his desk and headed to Trace to see if the results were in from the clothes that the victim was wearing. While he was in trace, Catherine wandered into his office. When she saw that he wasn't there, she sat behind his desk to wait for him. The e-mail alert blinking on his screen caught her attention. Pregnancy hadn't affected her curiosity and she fought the temptation to open the mail. But she managed to leave it alone.

Gil strolled back into his office, his head in a file, studying the results. "Gil?" she said.

He looked up and smiled at her over the folder. It was a warm smile, one that told her how much he loved her and that he was happy she was there. A lump formed in her throat as she realized how much that meant to her.

He took her customary place at the corner of his desk and gazed down at her. "You are the best thing I've seen all night," he said quietly. Leaning over, his fingers worked their way into her hair, gently parting the strands as they made their way to her scalp, where they transmitted his love and imparted comfort to her. She closed her eyes, drinking in the sensation and living in that one moment. And then she flet his fingers withdraw as she heard him sigh.

She opened her eyes, disappointed at his retreat. He was still looking at her, a small smile at the corners of his mouth. His eyes said what his mouth did not. He wanted them to be somewhere else, a place where they could lock the world out and they could lose themselves in each other. It wasn't lust she saw in his eyes, but it was need. "Save that thought for later," she whispered. His eyes widened, surprised that she had read him so well; and then he let out a soft chuckle. "You know me too well, Mrs. Grissom."

Just the she felt a flutter in her abdomen. Her eyes darted to her stomach and she giggled. "Catherine?" he asked, his eyelids arched.

"The babies are awake," she smiled. "They are moving around in there…here give me your hand, quick." He offered his hand, which she placed over the area of her tummy that was fluttering. "Feel it?"

This was her fifth pregnancy and he was still intrigued by the workings of it all. He kept his hand on her, hoping to feel the lives inside of her, but he only felt the warmth of her. "No, I can't feel anything," he said, a little disappointed.

Catherine covered his hand with her own hand and patted it. "Hey little people, this is your Daddy. He wants to feel you play too." She felt another flutter but when she looked at Gil, she saw that he didn't feel it. "Maybe it's too early," she lamented.

"They must be tiny," he said in awe.

"Yeah, well …they don't feel so tiny."

He looked up at her face, a single tear sitting in the corner of his eye. "Thank you," he mumbled.

"For what?" she asked in surprise.

"For giving me the most beautiful gifts a woman can give a man." The blue of his eyes was so clear and bright. His face was full of honesty and awe, as well as gratitude. And even more, he looked at her with such love that Catherine couldn't speak. So she simply sat there, holding his hand to her tummy a little tighter, fighting back her own tears of awe and gratitude…and love.

They stayed locked in that single, precious moment until his phone rang. He sighed as he glared at it. "Answer it," she said.

"Grissom."

Catherine watched as he changed back into investigator mode, smiling with the knowledge that she was the only person on the planet that ever got to see the Gill Grissom that she had just seen. To everyone else, he was an emotionally repressed, eccentric bug lover with a quirky personality and a penchant for disappearing. She eased out of his chair, motioning for him to sit. He opened his file and jotted whatever information was being conveyed on a blank page at the front. She slipped into her customary spot on his desk and waited, content to watch him.

Finally the call ended and he leaned back in his chair, gazing up at her. "You doing okay…not overdoing it, I mean?"

"I'm okay," she smiled. "No one lets me do anything anyway."

"Good," he smirked. The blinking alert on his screen caught his attention and he frowned.

"Go ahead and open it," she coaxed.

"Its probably nothing," he replied.

"So make it stop blinking, open it."

He clicked the button and the e-mail sprang onto his screen. He sighed deeply, clearly frustrated.

"Who is it from?"

He looked at her cautiously. "Sara."

"Oh." She said very still and he waited for the explosion. But then she smiled. "So read it."

"Ah…she's asking a question about fly larvae."

"For a case?"

"I guess so. Sometimes I think she really is looking for information to help with a case and other times, I just don't know…"

"So answer it."

"But…are you sure?"

"Yeah, I am. I don't trust her one bit, Gil. She's going to make a serious play at some point in time. But I do trust you; I know you would never hurt me, not like that anyway."

She slid off his desk and started out of his office. Stopping at the door she turned around, "go ahead an answer her. Just be careful when you correspond with her, okay?"

"Okay," he smiled. His smile grew as he watched her walk down the hall. He always loved the view from the back.

/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/

Okay, so Cath is easing up a little; but is the 'Sara issue' rally resolved? Hmmm...time will tell. Meantime, the little button is down over there somewhere...


	38. Chapter 38

He answered the e-mail from Sara and of course, she continued sending them. Gil continued to respond, always careful to let Catherine know what was being transmitted. Her tummy grew larger until one day he did feel the babies fluttering inside of her and laughed with her at the sensation.

Erin came to them and said she needed to go back to being a full time student and would have to quit before the start of the next semester. Gil made inquiries through an agency which sent them several candidates to interview. Most were looking for smaller families and certainly were not prepared to deal with twins. They were beginning to panic when a woman in her early forties showed up on their doorstep, Mrs. Johansen. "Oh, I love babies," she had declared. "God didn't see fit to give me any of my own and so when my husband was killed, I decided to earn my living loving other people's babies."

"Your husband was killed?" asked Catherine.

"Yes, he was shot in the line of duty…a bank robbery gone bad, they said."

"Your husband was a policeman?"

"A detective, back in Houston. So, I know all about the strange hours and phone calls in the middle of the night…"

Catherine smiled as Gil explained that they actually worked at night and would need quiet while they slept in the day.

The woman smiled. I'm sure we can have a schedule that includes sleep for Mommy and Daddy. After all, everyone is happy when Mommy is happy and…'if Mom ain't happy then ain't nobody happy."

Catherine warmed to the woman. Gil got serious as he explained that Catherine would need lots of rest, more and more as the pregnancy progressed. "The burden of caring for the children will primarily be yours," he stated.

"Of course, that is what you will be paying me for, isn't it? We'll come play with Mommy and maybe have a story time or something, but the workload is mine. I understand that."

"Well, I'll help when I am home and her mother and sister will help as they can, but yes…it's mostly on you."

"One thing does concern me…" began Catherine.

"Oh?" the woman waited. Gil looked at Catherine, perplexed.

"You are an attractive woman, if you don't mind me saying so. And well, women have a habit of …hmmm, how shall I say this….well, hell…just out with it Catherine….chasing my husband. Will I have anything to worry about there?"

Gil was flustered. "Catherine!" he blurted out.

Mrs. Johansen chuckled. "Well, I can see why women might chase Mr. Grissom. But I'm from the South, I understand lost causes. Even if I did find him…interesting, there'd be no point. He clearly is enchanted by you, Mrs. Grissom. Besides, he's not really my type…too pleasant; I tend to gravitate toward grouches for some reason."

Gil was totally embarrassed by the turn of the conversation; but not too embarrassed to see the glint in Catherine's eyes as she flashed him a smile…."hmmm, grouches. Really?"

"Sad, but true," Mrs. Johansen replied.

"That's very interesting," Catherine said as her mind seemed to steamroll.

Gil smirked as he felt pity for their friend, Jim. The man was about to be set up; Gil could feel Catherine plotting already.

Ah, well, Mrs. Johansen…do you have any questions for us?" he asked, trying to get the conversation back to its purpose.

"Well, how about time off? One day a week… a few hours a day; how would we arrange that?"

"We could probably manage one day a week and work our schedules to give you a couple of hours of free time two or three days a week. "I'm on call a lot, which would mean you might be. What I mean is, we could give you time away from the children, but you'd be on call in case I have to go to work."

She considered his explanation and nodded. "That sounds agreeable." She paused and the spoke again. "So when may I expect to hear form you?"

Gil and Catherine looked at each other. Catherine nodded to Gil as they quietly agreed that this was the one. "Well, we'd like you to start as soon as possible. That way, the children can get to know you before Erin leaves. The only problem is, we don't have space. Erin is still living in the room that we set aside for a Nanny."

"Oh that's not a problem. I have a home here. I'll stay here, of course when I am on duty but on my days off, that's where I will go. That way I truly have time away and will come back refreshed. I can just come here in the days until Erin leaves and then go home once the children are settled for the night."

"Mrs. Johansen, you are a treasure." Catherine was sincere in her praise.

"Well, since I will be working here, perhaps you should call me Ruth. And I'll be Nanny Ruth to the children, if that is satisfactory."

"Well Ruth, I'm Catherine and this is Gil. And Nanny Ruth is just right, I think."

Ruth began her new job the following Monday and things around the house began to run even smoother than before.

A month later, Ruth was settled in the Nanny quarters and Erin had left. Catherine was only working three nights a week and was being pampered at home the rest of the time. Lindsey and young Gil had made a game of bringing her bottles of water and generally looking out for her. Between the two of them, Catherine couldn't even go to the bathroom without the whole house knowing about her movement.

She was in her sixth month and the twins were definitely making their presence known. In the beginning, Catherine had to force herself to rest but by now, naps were a welcome part of her routine. Gil had called the night before to let her know he was working a double and not to expect him at his usual time. "In fact," he had groaned, "this one looks bad, I don't know when I'll get home. Are you okay?"

"I'm fine. I'm a queen, remember?"

He chuckled, wished her a good night, and then the line had gone dead. Catherine went to bed early, leaving Ruth to settle the troops. She woke in the early hours of the morning. Dawn was just breaking, casting an eerie glow in the bedroom. As her eyes opened she found herself peering into the bright blue eyes of her younger son, John. He was leaning on the bed, his arms folded under his chin, quietly watching her. When she opened her eyes, he grinned. In that instant he looked so much like his father that she had to smile, which only encouraged his grin. "Are you awake?" he whispered.

"Yes, I think I am," she answered, equally quiet.

"Oh…you not s'pposed to be wake," he frowned.

"It's okay. I got lots of sleep. Wanna come up in the bed with me?"

"Nope," he grinned. And then he ran out of the room.

Catherine wondered what that was about and decided to follow him but once she stood up, she decided a detour to the bathroom was in order. Once she had finished there, she headed down the hall. As she neared the kitchen, she heard murmurs and whispers. She stopped just outside and listened.

"Now Linsey, you put the butter after you toast it."

"Shut up, Gil. I know how to do toast. You're talking about the stand up toaster; this is the flat toaster. I can butter it before."

"Oh."

She heard the refrigerator door open and John's high voice, "I get the jewee"

"Get the red one, John" instructed Lindsey. "Mom likes it better than the purple."

"Kay…"

"Gil did you put the bacon in the micowave?"

"Yeah, Lins…. I pushed the 4 and the 5 like you said.

Just then Catherine felt a hand on her shoulder. She turned to see Ruth standing behind her. Ruth listened and smiled. "You go back to bed," she whispered. "I make sure they don't burn the house down."

Catherine nodded and headed back down the hall. Ruth headed for the kitchen. "Good morning, children"

"Nanny Ruth, we're making breakfast for Mommy," Gil offered. "She's always sad when Daddy isn't here to make it for her so we thought we could make her happy."

"I'm sure she'll be very happy. Now, let's see…what have you made?"

"We got toast with red jelly and bacon," he said.

"Well, that's a good start. But Mommy probably needs a little something else too. Didn't I see some fruit in the cupboard?"

Lindsey opened the door and pulled out a bowl with apples and bananas. "And there's grapes in the fridge," she added.

"Okay Lindsey, get the grapes and let's rinse a few. And Gil, I'll show you how to cut the bananas and I'll core an apple. And John, I think I saw some flowers blooming out by the gazebo. Why don't you run out and pick two or three to make her tray look pretty?"

The children got busy with their tasks and soon they had prepared a breakfast tray for their queen. John ran ahead as Lindsey struggled to carry it. Gil held the vase with flowers because Lindsey was afraid it would fall over.

John ran into the room and inched up to the bed. Catherine felt a thump as he plopped his arms on the mattress. She rolled over and smiled as his eyes lit up. "Sit, Mommy. Linsey bwingin' bweakfist."

Catherine looked up to see the small entourage enter the room. Lindsey just made it to the bed with the tray and Catherine reached out quickly to retrieve it before she spilled the contents. Gil slipped in and put the flowers on the tray. Catherine acted surprised and made a fuss over how wonderful it was to wake up to a surprise breakfast. The children climbed into the bed to chatter as they watched her eat. Ruth walked in with Caitlyn a few minutes later and put the baby on the bed too. Caitlyn was as excited as the others and giggled with glee.

A little while later, Ruth called the children to breakfast and retrieved Caitlyn for hers as well. Catherine looked at Ruth and thanked her for her part in the surprise. "This queen thing is fun," Catherine commented.

"Yes, it is. And it so nice that the children get to be a part of taking care of you. You've got a nice family, Catherine; one that most people only dream of."

"Yeah, I know how lucky I am, Ruth. I feel it everyday."

/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\

Okay, nice fluff...now the storm; but only after reviews:-)


	39. Chapter 39

Later that morning the children raced to the door when they heard a knock. "Uncle Jim," they squealed as the pulled him inside.

"Hey kids," he chuckled as he gave into their tugs.

Ruth heard the commotion and stepped out of the kitchen to see what the excitement was about. "Captain Brass?" She was surprised to see him since his visits were usually in the evenings. His face stopped her as she recognized his expression from her own experience. "Oh no…"

"Is Catherine awake? I need to speak to her. And maybe the kids can play outside or something?"

"I'll get her," Ruth hurried down the hall to Catherine. "Catherine, Captain Brass is here."

Catherine was stretched out on the bed, reading. She frowned. "What's he doing here? He's working a case with….oh my god, no…." She ran down the hall to Jim. "What happened? Where is he?"

Ruth gathered the children and took them to Lindsey's room. Catherine stood in the middle of her living room staring at Jim. "Tell me, Jim….where is he?"

"He's going to be okay, Catherine. I promise. He wanted me to come instead of calling. They took him to Desert Palm."

"Take me…I want to see him."

"Yeah, of course. Let's tell Ruth what is happening though so she can stay with the kids."

"Yeah…I have to find my shoes," she said frantically.

"Catherine, really, it's not that bad, Jim said. Ruth stood just inside the room, having left the children to play in Lindsey's room. "Catherine, let him tell you what has happened before you panic."

"Yes…what happened Jim?"

"The case we were working…there were explosives at the site. One of the officers accidently set one off and it sent shards of wood and glass everywhere. Gil got hit. The worst one is in his shoulder. He'll be okay Catherine, but I won't sugar coat it; he's gonna hurt like hell for awhile."

She stood still, absorbing what he said. Ruth walked up behind her, putting her hands on Catherine's arms. "Do you hear that? He's going to be okay. Breathe Catherine. He's okay. Now you sit for a minute while I find your shoes." Catherine did as she was told and sat in a nearby chair. Ruth returned quickly with her shoes and she slipped them on. As she headed out the door, Jim handed Ruth one of his cards with his cell number jotted on the back. "If you need anything, call me."

She took the card and nodded. "We'll be okay here. You just take care of them."

Arriving at the hospital, Catherine spotted Nick and Warrick at the end of the hall and headed for them. "Any word?"

They both walked to her, hugging her and trying to console her. "Not yet. He hasn't been here long," Nick said. "He's in Exam Room 3, if you want to go back."

She headed to the room just as Jim came in from parking his car. Looking at the two younger men, he asked where Catherine was going.

"Back to find Grissom," Warrick replied.

"You assholes let her go by herself?" Jim said as he bolted through the doors. He didn't want her to see Gil without someone there for support; the guy was a bloody mess and he knew Catherine would flip.

She made it to the doorway of the exam room and stopped. Blood dripped from the gurney to the floor as she watched in horror. Jim got to her just as she gasped. Pulling her into a hug, he tried to calm her down. "It looks worse than it is, Catherine. Take a minute to catch your breath and then we'll go in. Come on, now. Don't let him see how upset you are; he's already upset enough for the both of you."

"Upset?" she whimpered.

"Yeah, he's afraid this is going to be too much for you." His voice was quiet and soothing. "He's not worried about himself right now; he's worried about you and those babies. Come on, honey…show him what you are made of."

Catherine pulled out of the hug, nodding. "Right…gotta get it together. I'm tougher than this and so are these babies."

"That's right, honey. You ready now?"

"Yeah," she said as she took a deep breath. "Just stay close, okay?"

"I'm right here…for both of you."

Catherine stepped into the room and approached her husband. A doctor was standing over him, carefully pulling out little shards of glass and wood with tweezers. Gil's eyes were open but he looked out of it. "Doctor?"

"You his wife?"

"Yes, I'm Catherine. How is he?"

"Oh, he'll be okay after awhile, but he's going to hurt. There's little pieces in him everywhere, it seems. Luckily they missed his eyes. The detective said he instinctively covered his eyes when everything started flying. His hands have all sorts of little cuts in them. We're going to get all the pieces out and stitch up the deep ones. The only one that is any real concern is the one in his shoulder. It went in pretty deep and there is probably some muscle damage. An orthopedist is on his way to look at it. Unless the shoulder needs surgery, he'll probably be able to go home tonight, but I don't know if you want him there. He's going to be grouchy."

Catherine smiled as she reached to touch his head.

"I wouldn't so that, if I were you. We haven't cleaned out his hair yet. You'll get cut."

"Oh…so where?"

"He's better on his right side. Maybe you can find a spot over there?"

Catherine stepped around to the other side and found a spot on his arm that looked undamaged. She just needed to touch him. As she did, he blinked and moaned. He turned his head toward her and grinned. "Hey…"

"Hey yourself. You trying to scare me or something?"

"No…just…you okay?" His eyes began to clear and he winced when the doctor pulled another piece out.

"Uh oh," said the doctor. "The meds are wearing off already. Nurse!" he yelled.

A young woman appeared in the doorway. "Yes?"

"He's coming out of it. Let's get another dose and then I need you to help me. We need to get this done."

She disappeared and returned after a couple of minutes with a needle. She opened the line on his IV and shot the dose into it. Catherine could see it take effect almost immediately as Gil got a goofy grin and then slipped back into a fog.

The doctor glanced up at Catherine. "Look, he's out of it and you look like you need to sit down. Why don't you go out and find a seat? I'll come find you when we finish here."

"But…I don't want to leave him," she said.

"There's not much you can do for him at the moment. And you getting all weak kneed and passing out on us will just make things worse for everybody. I'll come get you in a few minutes, okay?"

Catherine took one last look at him and then walked out to Jim, who was leaning against the wall in the hall. "You okay?"

"Yeah, Jim. He just looks so torn up…" She glanced back into the room. "Doctor says most of it isn't deep. I uh…" she wiped her forehead. "I um, think I need to sit down."

"Yeah," he said as he took hold of her arm. "Come on, I saw some chairs around the corner." Jim walked her to the chairs and got her settled quickly. Glancing around, he spotted a plastic case that held supplies. He pulled it over and closed the lid. "Here, let's get your feet up," he said as he leaned over to help her lift them.

Catherine watched the normally gruff detective as he tended to her and smiled. "How'd we get so lucky Jim?"

"What? Lucky?"

"Yeah, friends like you don't come along very often."

Jim shot her a shy grin. "Aw shucks ma'm, you're embarrassing me," he teased.

She grinned and put her hand on his cheek. "I mean it, you're the best."

"Hey, I gotta take care of you two. You named a kid after me," he shrugged.

"Yeah and I decided we call him Gil and he's not like Gil at all. John should have been Gil. Little Gil is more my child. In fact, Gil was teasing me the other day that he thought you and I had made little Gil. He said he has a sense of mischief that reminds him of both of us."

"Guess I've been hanging around the kid too much. Bad influence and all," Jim smirked.

"The best influence, the way I see it. And when he's old enough to understand, he's going to be really proud that he was named after his 'Uncle Jim' too."

"You kiddin' me? You guys naming him after me was one of the proudest days of my life."

A mischievous gleam ignited in Catherine's eye. "Hey, what do you think of Ruth?"

"I don't know. Gil says she's a Godsend. Says she is great with the kids and has the house running smooth, even though that isn't a part of her job description. She seems nice enough."

"Oh yeah, she's really nice. And attractive too, don't you think?"

Jim looked at her warily. "She's easy on the eyes, yeah…" He chuckled. "Your husband is lying in there getting picked apart and you're out here trying to set me up with the nanny?"

"Hey, have to do something to keep my mind off of what they are doing to him," She shrugged light-heartedly.

Jim nodded in mock disbelief. "You are a real piece of work, Catherine Grissom."

"Gil tells me that all the time."

"Well, just remember this; if you succeed in hooking us up and things get serious, you lose a great nanny."

"Hmmm…hadn't thought of that. But I'm sure we could figure something out."

They sat in silence, waiting for word from the doctor. Nick and Warrick wandered back and joined them, bringing Jim a cup of coffee and Catherine a flavored water.

"Hope its okay, Catherine," Nick said. "We figured caffeine wasn't a good idea."

"This is perfect, guys. Thanks."

/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\

Okay, just a little storm...can I make another one soon?


	40. Chapter 40

The little group waited for the doctor, who finally emerged from the room. Smiling, he walked toward Catherine. "Mrs. Grissom, he's waking up again; at least, I think you could call it awake. Our orthopedist checked out his shoulder and doesn't believe he needs anything done except stitching wound and keeping the area quiet while it heals. The splinter of wood did get tangled up in some muscle but with care, it should heal on its own. If you would like, I can admit him for the night or I can release him to go home and rest."

"I want him home," Catherine responded. "I'm going to spoil him and then kick his ass for scaring me like that."

The guys chuckled behind her and Jim looked at the doctor. "You think she's kidding, but he'll be lucky if the ass kickin' waits until tomorrow."

The doctor grinned. "Well, probably better to wait on that. With the pain meds he's on, he wouldn't feel it right now anyway."

Jim went to get his car while Catherine signed the necessary papers for Gil's release. Nick and Warrick helped their mentor to Jim's car. "Thanks guys," Catherine smiled as she hugged each one. Then she climbed into the car and they headed home.

Ruth had told the children that their father had been hurt and Mommy went to see about him. She wasn't sure what to expect herself and so she joined the children in shock when the Catherine and Jim walked Gil into the house. His clothes were bloody and he had little cuts and nicks all over. There were several butterflies and a few places that had been stitched and bandaged. His shoulder was wrapped and his arm in a sling.

Lindsey and Little Gil ran to their father but John stood back, watching. He burst into tears when he saw Gil wince as the other two touched him. "Daddy hurt," he cried. Ruth scooped him up and held him, "Yes honey, Daddy got hurt. But he just needs to rest and let everything heal. He'll feel better soon."

Jim walked with Gil to the bedroom, where he and Catherine helped Gil get changed and into bed. Every movement and every touch seemed painful. Once he was settled Jim prepared to leave. "Listen Catherine, just call me if you need anything. Okay?"

"Yeah, I will. And thanks Jim."

Ruth saw Jim to the door. He turned and spoke softly. "Don't let her overdo it. I know she's worried about Gil and all, but she needs to rest too."

"Yes, I know. Don't worry. And I still have your card if we need anything."

"Good. Don't hesitate to use it," he smiled. And then he left.

Catherine sat on the bed next to Gil. He looked up at her with a silly grin, his blue eyes just a little too bright, she thought. As she gazed into his dilated pupils, she realized her husband was stoned; his state may have been medically approved, but it was unsettling never the less. His grin however, was contagious and she realized she was grinning back.

His hand reached for her hair and he began to giggle. Catherine looked at him bizarrely; she couldn't remember ever having seen him giggle like this. "Gil, you had your last dose of painkillers at the hospital, right?"

"No," he snickered. "I hurt all over so while you were talking to Jim, I popped another one…just one though."

"Oh," she said. "And where is the bottle now?"

"Under my pillow," he said, his eyes dancing.

"May I have it now, please?"

"Have to find it yourself," he chortled.

"If you make me look for it, I might hurt you. Give it to me," she said smiling.

He frowned at her and pouted, looking every bit like his miniature carbon copy, John. Catherine watched as the lower lip protruded and the brows furrowed, assuming an expression that always got him what he wanted. "Gil," she said a little firmer.

Looking at her with his sad puppy gaze he reached under the pillow and produced the pill bottle. Handing it to Catherine, he whined. "you're no fun."

"Oh, I can be lots of fun. I'll demonstrate after you come off of that cloud you are flying on," she chuckled.

He relaxed back into his pillow, the grin leaving his face as he continued to watch her. Something in the way he was looking at her changed and Catherine was struck by the honesty and sincerity reflected in his countenance. With wide eyed innocence that had a child-like quality, he told her, "you are so beautiful."

It wasn't the first time he had said it to her. In fact, he had told her that many times over the years. But this had a different feel to it that caused a small lump to form in her throat. "I love you," she managed to say in spite of the obstruction in her throat and the tears that threatened her eyes.

"I know," he giggled.

She couldn't help herself, laughter erupted at his response. As her laughter died, reality hit her. He was lying in their bed, cut, bruised and bandaged because there had been an explosion at the crime scene. He would be okay and in a few weeks it would become a distant memory; on the other hand, if he had been closer to the explosion, he could be dead. She might have lost him and instead of sitting here laughing, she would be in their bed, crying. Fear gripped her and held on tightly, making her heart swell in her chest until she felt like she would burst.

He laid there, suddenly quiet and watching her. It was clear to him where her thoughts had gone and the effects of the pills were pushed aside by instant sobriety. "I'm okay," he whispered. "I'm here and alive. I'm okay." He reached for her and pulled her to him, hugging her tightly, willing her to feel his life force and hoping she might find comfort.

She pulled away from him, suddenly angry. "You could have been killed, Gil. You could be lying on the slab at the morgue right now instead of in the bed."

"But I'm not. I'm here and everything is fine."

"No! You scared the hell out of me," she insisted. Tears began to seep from her eyes. "I thought…" she began but paused and tried again. "When Jim told me, all I could think was that you were really hurt, that I might lose you. I don't think I could stand that."

"I'm sorry, honey. I'm sorry you went through that. I thought it might be better if Jim came to get you and tell you in person instead of just calling."

"Nothing makes it better; not when the most important person in your life gets blown up." Her expression was so serious and tears continued to trail down her cheeks, but he laughed. "I didn't get blown up, dear."

His laughter irritated her more. "Excuse me, but there was an explosion, right. And lots of little pieces of debris had to be removed from your body, right?"

"Well…yeah," he answered, deliberately not getting her point.

"Gil Grissom, this is not funny. It is not a joke. If you had been…if …" she began to sob.

Now he did take her into his arms and held her tightly, determined to keep her there. "But it turned out to not be serious, Cath. I'll be okay. We'll be okay. Honey, I love you. You know that I would never be careless with my life…it means too much to me with you in it. I don't want to miss out on any of it. Please don't cry; I really am okay."

"Promise you will do your best to stay safe?"

"Of course I will. I promise." He held her another moment and then said, "now, I'm kind of tired. Lie down with me and keep me company?"

She stretched out next to him and he whispered for her to roll over on her side. Spooning her, he nestled into the back of her neck, his breath tickling her. "When my time does come, this is how I want to be buried," he told her quietly.

"What if I'm not dead?"

"Hmmm, I guess I'll just have to wait around until you are. But even if I do go before you, I'll be waiting for you to come to me, when you are ready. And then, this is how we'll spend eternity."

Catherine rolled her eyes. "God, you can be so morbid at times."

"Mmmm, but you love me anyway," he said, his voice drifting away as he fell asleep.

/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\

News on the preggers front comes next.


	41. Chapter 41

This one is short but there is a surprise for you at the end. Enjoy!

/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\

Most of Gil's wounds healed quickly. His shoulder took the longest and was the most frustrating, but even it began to get better after a couple of weeks. When he first went back to work, Catherine didn't seem to worry much because he wasn't cleared to work in the field by the doctor. But at the end of the second week at work, the doctor cleared him for limited field duty and Catherine began to get nervous. She was good at hiding her anxiousness from Gil, but Ruth saw through her immediately.

On the nights Catherine and Gil both went to work, Catherine spent most of her shift checking up on him. She would call which ever CSI was unlucky enough to be paired with him until finally one night Jim Brass called her in his office. "Catherine, I just got off the phone with Warrick. Seems you have called him four times in the last few hours to check on Gil. Catherine, they really do have work to do. You can't keep calling them and expecting them to do your spying for you."

"But Jim, I just need to know he's okay. It scared me so much when he got hurt. I know I'm overdoing it, but I just can't seem to stop myself."

"I know Catherine. But he's still on limited duty. The others are doing most of the down and dirty stuff anyway."

"I know, I know. Okay, I'll try."

Somehow in all of her checking up and all the phone calls, Gil had managed to not find out. He remained oblivious to her worry until Ruth pulled him aside the next morning after Catherine went to lie down.

"Gil, she worries constantly about you when you are out in the field. I've seen it here and Captain Brass has mentioned it. I don't know what can be done, but she gets too worked up over it. Now I'm worried about her," she concluded.

Gil thanked Ruth and then began to worry himself. Catherine was more and more tired and she didn't need stress. And on top of everything else, Catherine had been in his office that morning when Sara Sidle called. She heard his end of the conversation and knew that Gil kept it short and to the point, but he could tell that it had unsettled her anyway.

After she had napped for a couple of hours, he slipped in the bed beside her and snuggled against her. She was awake but lethargic as she nuzzled into his arms. He stroked her hair, his fingers moving gently through her strands, coaxing a contented sigh from her. "Cath," he said his mouth close to her head so that he could speak in a soft soothing tone. "Honey, I wish you would stop worrying so much about me. I'm fine. And I've worked crime scenes for years without getting hurt. It was just a fluke that I got hurt a few weeks ago. I meant it when I promised to be more careful and I am trying."

"I know, Gil. It's just…I can't help it. I try not to worry but I do anyway."

"Well, you make me worry. This much stress can't be good for you or the babies."

"I know."

"You know, we don't have any baby names yet. We need to start thinking about that."

"I have been," she said, suddenly becoming more alert. Reaching into the drawer of the bedside table, she pulled out a baby name book. "Sometimes when I'm resting, I look through the names. But, do we want sound alike names since they are twins?"

"You mean like Flopsy and Mopsy?" he grinned.

"Well," she said giggling, "not _those_ names, but yeah."

"I don't know. There were twins at my school named Dora and Nora and it just seemed silly. Dora was short and fat and Nora was tall and lanky."

Catherine giggled again. "I see your point." Opening the book, she told him, "I have a few favorites…"

"Okay, Let me hear them…"

"Well, for girls, Deborah and Melissa. Both names mean bee, but Deborah is Hebrew and Melissa is Greek."

"You want to name your children after a bug? I like it," he smiled.

"Or Hannah and Grace; Hannah means "grace" in Hebrew."

"Well, that's great, but do you have any boy favorites?"

Leon and Noel?"

"Hmmm, reverse order. Any others?"

"Well, I thought about Jonathan and Matthew; both mean gifts of the Lord. But with a John already, I don't think so…"

"May I look," he asked as he reached for the book. She handed it to him and he began to flip through. "What about Damien and Cosmo? They were twin brothers who were martyred and are the patron saints of physicians."

"Let's see…Cosmo Grissom, with curly hair and glasses. Just hang a 'kick me' sigh on the kid, why don't you?"

"Yeah, I see your point. Well, how about Matthew and Theodore? Both mean gift of or gift from God."

"Theodore…well, we could call him Ted…or Teddy." She smiled as her mind pictured two little boys, Matt and Teddy. "I like that. Got any other ideas?"

"Well, ….if we have one of each, Aiden and Diana or Nadia are anagrams. Aiden means fire; if he had your hair….Diana means heavenly."

"Okay," Catherine said thoughtfully. "Possibilities."

"Or Dylan and Lynda?"

"Maybe. What about if they are both girls?"

"Okay…I like Elizabeth and Alexis for no reason except I like the names."

"Lizzie and Lexie….hmmmm….." Catherine was turning the sound of those names in her head. "Any others?"

"You can't have narrowed your list so much. You have to have other ideas."

"I also like Morgan and Madison for girls and Matthew and Marcus for boys."

"Sounds like you've narrowed your list quite a bit," he smirked.

"I've had a lot of time to think about it."

"Okay, well, we have a list to work with. We both like Matthew. Oh, and you know that Thomas means twin don't you?"

"Yes, I do."

Catherine stretched and yawned. "I have a doctor's appointment in an hour and a half. I should get ready. You are coming with me, aren't you?"

"Of course."

/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\

Okay, this is where you get to have some fun and influence the story. You get to vote on the baby names. You can vote on the pairs or if there are names from two different pairs, you can pull one from each and make that your choice. Guess that means you get to determine the sex(es) also. I'll be watching to know what to name those babies, lol. Of course if everybody makes completely different choices, then I get to choose.


	42. Chapter 42

Catherine was sitting on the exam table in the scratchy paper gown provided by the nurse. Her vitals had been checked and she was waiting for the doctor. Gil was still in the waiting room and would join them once the exam was complete. She heard a sound at the door as the doctor pulled her chart from the box. Dr. Morris entered the room frowning. "Catherine, your blood pressure seems a little elevated."

"Oh, well… Gil got hurt a few weeks ago. I suppose that could be the cause."

Dr. Morris smiled. "Oh, that and the fact that you are carrying twins. Not to mention you are in stressful field."

"Well, I did cut back at the lab. But that's been several months ago."

"Okay, well…let's see how the little ones are doing and we'll get Gil in here."

"Okay," Catherine stretched out for the exam.

Finished with the exam, Dr. Morris suggested they 'look in' on the twins and sent Catherine to the room with the ultrasound. A nurse called Gil to join them. Morris looked at his arm, still in a sling. "You did get hurt."

He nodded. "It's getting better everyday," he said. "I thought there wasn't another ultrasound scheduled for another week or two."

"Well, her blood pressure is up a little. I just want to peek in and be sure the little ones are okay with that."

Gil became uneasy at the news of elevated blood pressure. He had researched twins and knew that it added stress to the mother's body and that elevated blood pressure could be a sign of serious complications. His nervousness wasn't lost on Catherine. She saw as he paled and swallowed hard, trying to contain his emotions. Reaching for him, he grasped her hand as they waited for the picture to appear on the screen.

"Ah, there they are," smiled the doctor.

"Wow, that's the clearest we've seen them," observed Gil.

"Yeah,' said Catherine. "You can see where one ends and the other begins."

They stared in awe at the two babies curled together in her womb. One had its head turned toward them with tiny little fingers at its mouth. "Is that one sucking its thumb?" asked Catherine.

"Looks like it," said the doctor, concentrating on the screen.

Suddenly they moved and the second baby put its foot up, so that it seemed to be plastered against the screen. "I see all five toes," said Gil, gleefully.

Then the babies shifted again, hugging one another. Tears began to slide down Catherine's cheeks. "Gil," she whispered.

"I see," he choked out.

They watched in fascination while the doctor completed her examination. "Okay," she finally said. "We'll let them rest now."

The screen went blank and everyone relaxed. Dr. Morris handed Catherine a tissue to clean up with and then sighed. "Okay Catherine, your blood pressure is up. At this point it seems everything is still good and we want to keep it that way. It's time to take a break from work. I want you to take short walks several times a day and other than that I want you to rest, feet up and quiet. You don't have to spend the day in bed; you can stretch out on the couch if that feels better. But feet up. And Gil, I don't know what you did to get hurt, but don't do it again."

"He tried to get himself blown up," remarked Catherine.

Dr. Morris looked at Gil and the various cuts that were still healing. "Looks like you almost succeeded."

"It looks worse than it was," answered Gil. "But I promise to avoid being blown up."

"Okay," said the doctor. "Any other stresses that we need to remove from your lives?"

Catherine nodded negatively but Gil thought of one…Sara Sidle. He knew how to deal with that and would at the next opportunity. "Okay, so you two know what to do. And Gil, if you would pick up one of those blood pressure monitors, one of the wrist ones is good enough. That way you can watch it between visits here. If it keeps going up, then I need to see Catherine immediately."

Gil took Catherine home and then headed for the drug store to get the monitor. He checked her several times that afternoon and evening and showed Ruth how to check also. "I can check it myself, "Catherine insisted.

"I know," Gil said. "But I want to be sure."

Catherine was somewhere between amused at his doting and frustrated by it. But she played along, deciding he needed a way to deal with his anxiousness and if that meant getting her wrist squeezed a hundred times a day…well, she could do it.

"Gil, you're crazy," she said after he checked her for the fifth time.

"About you I am," he replied, his blue eyes looking at her with the puppy-like expression that always won her heart.

"You know Gil, Dr. Morris didn't say anything about not having sex…"

"Oh no…no Cath, that might…uh, as much as I would like it, I don't think…"

"My feet would be elevated…and it is good for the heart. Might help my blood pressure, you know?"

"No, I don't know."

"Aw, come on, Gil." She said stroking his inner thigh and delighting in his obvious response.

"God Cath, I don't want to hurt you…or the babies."

"You won't hurt us. I won't let you…but me being this horny. It can't be good either, you know?"

His eyes widened. "you're …horny? But I…I thought all your hormones were, well, all about the babies."

"Nope. Right now, they are all tuned into you. All this fuss and bother and having you in such close proximity has sent them all a flutter."

"A flutter? What are they, butterflies?"

"Something like that…Come on, Gil. We haven't done anything since you blew yourself up. I'm ready to do a little exploding myself."

"Okay, if you're sure…I wouldn't want you to explode."

"Oh, there's going to be explosions Gil. These just won't involve a trip to the emergency room."

His hand went to the side of her face, his fingers inching into her hair. He stroked her cheek with his thumb as he smiled at her. "I love you, Mrs. Grissom."

"Oooo, you know how to turn a woman on," she purred. "I love it when you call me that."

"I know," he smiled as his lips descended on hers. The kiss was deep and passionate, and too short as far as Catherine was concerned. "What, Gil…why did you stop?"

"Because you need your rest."

"Oh no…no you don't, you can't leave me like this….Gil?"

He stood up, smiling at her. "You rest and then we'll, um…talk."

"Talk! Just talk? I don't think so, mister. You owe me and I intend to collect."

He chuckled as he closed the door behind him. He heard the pillow hit the door on her side as he moved down the hall. "This isn't helping my blood pressure," she called after him.

Gil returned an hour later and curled up next to her sleeping body. She awoke awhile later and smiled. Fighting the temptation to wake him to finish what they had started, she snuggled into him. _I'll let him sleep. He has to go to work in a few hours. But when he gets home tomorrow…_

_/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\\_

I"ll leave it to your imagination about "tomorrow." The twins are coming, the twins are coming. Better get those votes in, if you haven't already.


	43. Chapter 43

Gil had difficulty concentrating at work that night; he wanted to be home with Catherine. Her elevated blood pressure worried him more than he admitted and he needed to see that she was okay. He thought about calling her but decided a call in the middle of the night probably wouldn't help the situation, so he tried once again to concentrate.

Finally the evidence in his current case came together and he was able to close it. He finished the report and had a few minutes before the end of the shift so he checked his e-mail. There were three from Sara.

He sighed deeply as he opened the first one.

_Hi Gil,_

_Haven't heard from you in awhile. Hope all is well._

_Sara_

Pushing the delete button, he moved on to the next one.

_Gil,_

_Had this really interesting case that I would like to talk to you about. Call me?_

_Sara_

His eyebrow arched as her reread it. "Had a case…as in solved it and now it is past." _So why does she want to talk to me?_

Once again his finger hit the mouse, which hit the delete button.

The last one read:

_Hey,_

_I've decided you are avoiding me. Are you? I really enjoyed our time together at the conference. Maybe next time we can do it without your assistant?"_

_Sara_

Gil frowned. _Assistant? She thinks Catherine is my assistant?_

He began to type a reply:

_Dear Sara,_

_Sorry; have been really busy. As for Catherine…I've never thought of her as my assistant, although I suppose she does fill that role in various ways. Right now for instance, she is at home resting as she assists me in carrying on the Grissom name. We are expecting twins next month. I'll be sure to give her your best wishes._

_Gil_

He reread it to check for spelling and then hit the send button.

Satisfied that he had completed his work for the night, he turned out the lights to his office, closed the door, and left.

Catherine was waiting for him when he got home. He was surprised that she was awake. He was even more surprised by what she was wearing; or rather what she wasn't wearing. As he crawled under the covers he discovered that she was nude. It had been awhile since she had done that to him and his response was her desired one.

He ran his hand along her side as she lay with her back to him, relishing the feel of her skin beneath his fingertips. Feeling her body squirm in response heightened his awareness of her natural state and made him want more. His hand settled on her hip as he nuzzled behind her, his lips inching along the crevice of her neck, tasting the sweetness of her. He felt as well as heard her small moan of pleasure as he gently caressed her hip and thigh before letting his fingers travel across her luscious ass. It was one of his favorite parts of her body.

His lips trekked along her shoulder and then his hand traveled up her side to her breast. As usual, they had grown with her pregnancy and were full and firm, taunting him with their roundness. Her nipples had grown darker and now stood proudly erect from her mounds. Gil had always been as ass man but her breasts when she was pregnant drove him crazy, as they were doing this morning.

He let his fingers circle her nipple, teasing and titillating her until she rolled over to give him the full view. She smiled at his intake of breath as he took in the sight of her. She delighted in the lusty glint that came into his eyes as he perused her body; his expression made her think of a predator about to pounce. He wanted her and that knowledge filled her with pleasure.

Her hand cupped his cheek as she gazed into his darkening blue eyes, inviting him to feast on her body. His eyes travelled the length of her before settling on her lips, which his soon covered. There was a hint of the mint flavored toothpaste they used in his mouth but as his tongue penetrated into her mouth, she forgot about taste. He teased and taunted her with his instrument of torture, as he explored her mouth. His assault was dizzying and she broke away, taking in air as another small moan escaped from her. "Gil," she whispered his name, but in the quiet of their room, he could hear her arousal as she spoke.

Her quickened breaths and soft moans fueled his fire and his lips began moving, searching for new places to explore. Her hands were in his hair, massaging and stroking until they found a rhythm that foreshadowed what would come. She could feel the heat building within him as it spread over her.

His lips made their way to her breast, circling first one and then the other nipple, flicking them and then enclosing them in his lips. Occasionally he would take her between his teeth and gently tug, sending an odd mixture of pleasure and pain through her body.

Her hands were on his chest now, rubbing and kneading. She loved the feel of his chest, the smoothness of his skin and the taught muscles beneath. Her eyes drank in the tiny ripples in his pectoral muscles as he shifted positions and tightened the muscles even more.

He continued to tease and nibble at her breast, his tongue drawing little circles and well as nipping at her rosy little towers. Catherine felt the need for him building within her and as he tweaked her nipple, she reached for his rod.

She loved holding him in her hand. He felt so vibrant and alive as she grasped him. He was hard when she made contact but immediately he thickened and grew even harder. She smiled at the thought of him inside her. Problem was, most of the more traditional methods of achieving that goal were not available to them His sex kitty was almost eight months pregnant with twins. Some things were just not possible.

Her attention to his manhood was almost too much. Not all of his thoughts about her through the night had been worry; he'd had some pretty fantastic pictures in his mind of what might be waiting for him at home and consequently, he's come to bed already primed. He leaned back, giving her full access to him, closed his eyes and let the sensation of her hand on him flow over him. When he was sure he could take no more, he covered her hand with his, signaling her to stop. She leaned in to him, her mouth next to his ear. Her breath was hot on the side of his face as she whispered wantonly, "what's the matter baby, you want me as much as I want you?"

Her taunting made him chuckle and then he made his move. Rolling her onto her side, he once again began fondling her ass and then his hand trailed over her hip and around front in search of her treasure. His fingers slipped easily into the folds of her femininity as they bathed in the silky moisture of her arousal. She opened her legs wider, causing her to rock back into him, pressing against his rigid cock and nearly sending him over the edge. She smiled at the sound of his groan and slowly began to reposition herself, moving to where she was at an angle to him, granting his now throbbing hardness admittance to her treasure box. He took the hint and the tip of his rod was bathing in her wetness instantly. Once he was satisfied that she was ready, he entered.

Careful to keep from going too deep he eased in, letting out a long moan as he did. She pushed back at him, her ass pressing against him which made him lose it. His thrusts were answered by her own as they climbed the dizzying heights of ecstasy together until finally he exploded within her, setting off a frenzied response from her as she found release.

They remained curled together as their bodies cooled but their need for one another lingered. His hand played gently over her, the gentleness of his touch continuing to warm her. Eventually his hand stilled and she smiled as she heard his breathing change into soft snores against her shoulder. Careful not to wake him, she disentangled herself from him and headed for the bathroom to freshen up before facing breakfast with their four children.

??

Is this what you were hoping for? lol. Press the little button and let me know;-)


	44. Chapter 44

OKay, I rarely do the little disclaimer tht says I don't own any of it; I mean, if I owned it would I be here? Oh, but wait...I do own it! Yeah, And Marg, Paul, and Billy are sitting on my front proch sipping coffee. Yeah, right.

THEBABIESARECOMINGTHE BABIESARECOMINGTHEBABAIESARECOMING

The babies came early, by two weeks. Catherine had followed doctor's orders but in the end, the twins were in a hurry. Gil was at work when she called him. He raced home to find her waiting by the front door. Ruth assured him that she had the other children covered. She would load the kids in the van and meet them at the hospital later.

Gil had been through the drill four times before but he was still anxious. Catherine, on the other hand, seemed calm. Dr. Morris was already at the hospital, having been called in for another one of her patients.

Once they arrived at the hospital, things progressed quickly and in just a little over three hours, Catherine delivered the babies. The parents were disappointed that they didn't get to hold them, but nurses rushed the newborns to the neonatal ICU. Dr. Morris explained that their lungs needed a little help but that otherwise they looked good.

Once Catherine was in recovery, Gil went to the waiting room to tell the others about their new siblings. Jim had joined the group and was helping Ruth keep the kids entertained.

"So what did you get this time?" Jim asked.

"Girls," Gil grinned. "We have a list of names but we haven't made a final decision. Catherine is in recovery. They should move her to her own room in an hour or so."

"And how are the babies?" asked Ruth.

"They are in neonatal ICU. They need a little help breathing since they are early. But everything else seems fine."

"Can we see them?" asked Lindsey.

Gil bent down to talk to his children. "Not yet. They are in a special room where the doctors can help them breathe. But soon you'll be able to see Mommy."

John sided up to his father. "The babies hurt?" His blue eyes were filled with concern that didn't seem to register in little Gil and Lindsey. Caitlyn was too small to understand any of it.

"No John, the babies aren't hurt. But they needed a little more time in Mommy's tummy for their lungs to grow. Since they came out early, they need a little help. The hospital has a special machine that does that."

"Okay," he said softly. "But …are they scared?"

Gil hadn't thought in terms of the twins being scared. "I suppose maybe they are. But when Mommy and Daddy go see them, I think they will feel safer. And we'll tell them about their big brothers and sisters, I know they will feel better."

"Okay. You tell them we love them and we want them to come home and play soon."

"I will, son. And I'll give them a kiss from each one of you."

"Okay," the boy smiled shyly. "Tell Mommy we love her too."

"I will. But you'll be able tell her yourself soon."

"Daddy?" Lindsey asked. "Did Mommy hurt?"

"A little, honey. But she's fine. Just very tired."

"Cause I heard her say how much it hurt with Caitlyn."

"You heard that? Well, she's okay. You'll see soon."

"Let's let your Daddy get back to Mommy. I'm sure she's missing him," Ruth said. She gathered the children together and seated them again.

Gil headed back to recovery after calling Nancy and Lily, Catherine's mother. They were both excited by the news and promised to stop by the hospital later. He found Catherine dozing. Pulling up a stool, he sat next to her and took her hand in his. She opened her eyes and smiled at him. He returned her smile and kissed her hand. "I love you," he whispered.

"Mmmm, you'd better after what I just went through," she said drowsily.

He chuckled. "John wanted me to be sure to tell you that the kids love you too."

"They're okay?"

"Ruth has them in the waiting area and Jim is helping to keep them corralled."

"Jim?"

"Yeah, he seems to keep popping up to help Ruth."

"Good."

"Catherine…" he warned in a gentle tone.

"I'm not meddling, just….cheering for them," she smiled.

"Well, be sure you cheer from a distance. Whatever is between them is their business."

"I know."

Catherine was moved to her own room a little while later and Gil brought the kids in for a short visit. They were excited and bubbly and as much as Catherine loved having them around her, she was tired. Gil saw the fatigue and gathered the kids to take back to Ruth. "Catherine's tired and needs to rest," he told her. "Please take them home. We're supposed to go see the twins in a few minutes and then I'll go home for awhile."

Ruth nodded. "Okay, and don't worry about anything at home. We'll be fine. You concentrate on Catherine and those two new baby girls."

Jim was still there also. He shook Gil's hand, "Congratulations papa."

"Thanks Jim. And thanks for helping Ruth with the hoard."

"Hey, I'm Uncle Jim, it's part of the job. So, more girls, eh? What _is_ it with you and women?"

Gil smiled. "Woman Jim, only one for me. The baby girls…they are just a beautiful reflection of their mother."

"You're one lucky son of a bitch, you know?"

"Yeah, I do. If you had asked me ten years ago if I could ever be this happy I wouldn't have understood the question."

"Yeah, well…you'd better get back to your one woman; they tend to be cranky after childbirth." Jim's teasing held a note of truth.

Gil chuckled. "Yeah. See you later?"

"Sure. And …tell Catherine…congratulations for me, okay?"

Gil returned to his tired and yes, cranky wife. "When can we see them?" she asked as he walked into her room.

"Nurse told me in the hallway that they are getting a wheelchair for you. She said this will have to be short visit, just to let us see them and that we'll get to stay longer next time."

"Next time? They have to stay in the unit long enough for a next time?"

"Honey, you know their lungs haven't quite finished developing. We just have to be patient and give them time."

She huffed. "Yeah, I know."

A few minutes later a nurse's aid came in with a wheelchair. Gil helped Catherine into it and they headed for the neonatal unit. One of the nurses there gave them the paper gowns and masks to wear while they were inside the unit. "Your babies' lungs aren't ready to fight bacteria yet, so this is a precaution," she explained.

Once they had put on the paper garments, she led them to their twins. They were together in an incubator, each with tiny little tubes attached to their noses. Both were asleep. "They are lucky," said the nurse. "They only need to be fed oxygen to help them breathe. We have another baby today that requires a respirator. Obviously the more help they need, the higher the risk of complications. But a few days with oxygen and your little girls will be ready to go home."

"Can we hold them?" Catherine asked, anxiously.

"Not yet. We want them to rest and also to fill their lungs properly. When you come back in a few hours, you should be able to hold them for a few minutes. We want the early bonding and if you are planning to breast feed, you'll probably be ready to start that too."

Catherine nodded.

Gil looked through the plexiglas in awe. "They are so tiny," he whispered.

The nurse chuckled. "Well, they were occupying space that was built for one. The larger one weighed in at just a little over 4 pounds 4 and ½ ounces. The smaller one was 4 pounds 1 ounce."

"Our others were all six and a half to seven pounds," he observed. "I knew they would be smaller, but…"

Picking up on his nervousness about their size the nurse responded. "Mr. Grissom, they're babies…you hold 'em and love 'em just like you've done with your other babies."

"Yeah, thank you," he smiled. Leaning down behind Catherine, his mouth near her ear, he whispered, "They're your babies, of course I'm going to love 'em."

Catherine smiled and patted his hand on her shoulder. He covered her hand with his and squeezed it gently, letting his emotions flow through that simple contact.

"Decided on their names yet?" the nurse asked.

"Catherine?" Gil asked.

"I think Elizabeth and Alexis," she said firmly.

"So which one is which?" he smiled.

"Alexis is the first one and Elizabeth is second."

"Alphabetical order?" he chuckled.

"Seemed an easy solution." She replied.

Gil leaned toward the plexiglas. "Hello Alexis and Elizabeth; Mommy and Daddy are here. We're very proud of you. And John, that's one of your big brothers, wants you to know that he and Lindsey and Gil and Caitlyn all love you and are waiting for you to come home."

"Goodness, how many children do you have?" asked the nurse.

"This makes six, " smiled Catherine. "We're aiming for a baseball team."

The nurse smiled. "Well, you keep having twins and you'll be there before you know it."

Catherine didn't answer, she just groaned. Gil chuckled. "We might have to amend our goal," he said. "I think six is a nice number."

Catherine put her hand to the glass as if to touch her babies. "We're here my beautiful daughters. Mommy and Daddy are here. We love you so much. We'll come back soon to hold you and show you how much."

Gil wheeled Catherine back to her room and helped her to get settled into the bed. He sat with her awhile, just holding her hand. "I love you, Mrs. Grissom," he said lovingly.

Catherine moaned. "I'm tired Gil. Don't try to start something now."

Gil smirked. "Catherine, you are probably the only woman on the planet that is beautiful after having just given birth. But here you are, enticing me. I'm sorry; I am just a mere mortal man and am powerless against your beauty and charm. Of course, I want to start something. When you are near me, my love, my hearts beats faster and my breath quickens as I behold you. I…"

"Oh, can it Romeo," she chuckled.

Gil smiled at her, his fingers gently caressing the side of her face. His expression grew more serious as he looked at her. "God Catherine, you make me so happy. I never knew I could be so happy."

MUSHYMUSHYMUSHYMUSHY

Thanks to all who voted on thier names. Elizabeth had the most support with Alexis and Aiden coming in tied at second. I considered Alexis and Aiden but went with those who commented on the nicknames, Lexie and Lizzie. I'm kind of partial to them myself. So Gil's world is no longer balances as he has two more females than males in his family. Maybe one day I'll write about him dealing with so many teenage girls. I'll bet he would be fun. ANyway, thanks in advance for all the reviews you are about to post!


	45. Chapter 45

Gil and Catherine did get to hold their baby girls on the next visit. Gil had been nervous since they were so small, but took turns with Catherine and was soon confident that he wouldn't break them. Within a week both had been removed from the oxygen and once the pediatrician was satisfied, the two youngest Grissoms were taken home.

Gil took a few days off from work and Catherine took a few weeks. Slowly they began to return to a normal routine; whatever that might be for people who work nights and have six children.

Catherine had asked to be put back in the field as a CSI and after some conversations with A.D. Cavallo and the Under-Sheriff, a deal was struck to allow the deviation from departmental policy. Normally they would not have been allowed to work the same shift with both functioning as CSIs.

The team was growing closer as the two recruits evolved into veteran CSIs. There were rumors that Jim might be up for promotion and Gil began to wonder how that might affect their little group. He also worried that he might be promoted to Jim's job, which he didn't want.

They were preparing to celebrate the twins' birthday. Lindsey was in school and little Gil had just started Preschool. Ruth had become a valued ex-officio member of the family, just as Jim had been since they began. Under her watchful eye, the children were well cared for and Catherine gave thanks everyday for the woman's presence in their lives.

Crime was growing in Vegas and the decision was made to hire another CSI for Grave. Jim made a game of trying to scare the new hires off, justifying his actions to Gil by explaining that they had a good team that functioned well together. Jim wanted to be sure of any newcomer.

Gil had lost count of the new recruits that Jim had chased off and there was a betting pool in the lab for each new arrival. So far, Warrick Brown had the most wins and was several hundred dollars richer for his guesses. One night, Jim called Gil into his office to tell him that a new girl would be starting the next night.

"Her name is Holly Gribbs," said Jim. "Just out of the police academy and as green as they come."

"You going to chase this one away too?" Gil smirked at his friend and boss as he asked.

"I'll treat her same as the others and we'll see what happens," he snapped.

Gil had noticed that Jim seemed uneasy the last few weeks. He was more temperamental and was rougher on his subordinates than usual. For some reason, Warrick seemed to be getting a lot of Jim's negative attention.

Gil tried to ask Jim about it but only got half of an answer. "Guy's attitude reminds me of somebody else I used to know," growled Jim.

"Who?"

"Me, back in Jersey in the early days. He's headed for trouble, Gil; I can feel it, like it's crawling under my skin. I want to help him but I just seem to chew his ass instead."

"He's okay," Gil assured Jim. "He's turning into a very good CSI."

"Yeah. So is Nicky, but I don't worry about him like I worry about Warrick."

Jim's words proved prophetic. Holly Gribbs had shown up the next night and was immediately thrown into the fire. Warrick had gotten under Jim's skin that night and he's assigned Warrick to babysit her. Warrick had his own case he wanted to work and went over Jim's head to get a warrant and then left Holly alone at a scene while he followed up with the judge.

Holly Gribbs died on her first shift as a CSI. Everyone felt terrible, but Warrick carried the heaviest load. He was the one who had left her. The Sheriff wanted him fired. Jim took the heat for his CSI, feeling that he had played a part having goaded Warrick. By the end of the next day, Jim had lost hope of the promotion and been moved to Homicide. Warrick was on the verge of being fired, and Gil was running the unit. Everyone was out of sorts.

In a last ditch effort to try to save Warrick's career and everyone else's sanity, Gil decided to do an internal CSI investigation of the events and not turn it over to Internal Affairs. The problem was, they all knew Warrick too well and most were friends with him. They needed someone from the outside.

After his blunt e-mail to Sara Sidle clarifying Catherine's importance in his life, things had taken a turn and they had developed a long distance friendship, with Catherine's full knowledge. She wasn't happy when he decided to ask Sara to come run the investigation, but her discomfort had little to do with their previous history. Catherine simply didn't want an outsider poking around Warrick.

But Sara did come. She investigated and filed a report, which to Catherine's amusement Gil basically ignored. Warrick stayed and so did Sara. Slowly Sara became a part of the team and even a part of the little family that grew around the Grissoms.

Gil's dream of a baseball team came true also, although not quite in the way he envisioned. A month after the twins' second birthday, Gil worked a double homicide where a husband and wife had been killed. While investigating the scene, he found a six year old boy hiding under the kitchen sink. Gil's experiences with his own children helped him to comfort the boy, Aiden and when Children's Services came to take him to foster care he cried to stay with Gil. Once Catherine heard about the incident, they applied to be Foster Parents and Aiden came to stay with them. Two years later he became an official Grissom when they adopted him.

Four years later, Lindsey came home from school talking about a classmate who had been absent all week. Her father had been in New York on a business trip in 2001 and was a victim of the attack on the World Trade Center. Now the little girl's mother had cancer and was not expected to live much longer. Seven months later, ten year old Madison and her seven year old brother, Matthew came to live with them also. Gil had his team.

Grandmother Grissom had visited several times and the family had travelled to visit her twice before she died. In her last coherent conversation with Catherine, she had told her daughter-in-law how happy she was for her son and gave Catherine credit for his state. "I knew you two loved each other the moment I saw you together. But I admire you dear, for sticking with him. He, like his father, can be difficult at times. When my time comes, and I know it will be soon, I can go in peace knowing that my only child is in good hands. Thank you."

Catherine had cried that night as she remembered the remarks. And she wept a few weeks later as they sat beside the woman's grave for the service. His mother's death was hard on Gil but Catherine stayed close to him for weeks, a constant reminder that he was not alone.

The unit went through ups and downs. Sara had a period where she seemed to be struggling to find happiness. Nick was kidnapped and buried alive; they found him but almost not quickly enough. That had shaken the group badly. The whacky young labrat, Greg Sanders, expressed an interest in field work and so Gil had a pupil again and thrived on the exercise. Jim was involved in a friendly fire incident that stretched their friendship and Jim to the limit. Not too many months later, he was shot in the line of duty and Gil had been forced to make life and death decisions for his friend. In the midst of all of the tumult with their friends and extended family, Catherine discovered that casino mogul, Sam Braun was her father. The manner in which she found out was painful; the new knowledge put a strain on Catherine that became even more complicated when he was shot in front of her one night and died in her arms. After all that had happened and the years of being expected to perform administrative duties as well as investigative ones, Gil was showing signs of burn-out. He took a Sabbatical and spent a month at Williams College back East. Catherine cried when he left and cried with joy when he came back. After his return, even she admitted that it had been good for him but warned him that next time the entire clan would go too.

It was Sara's kidnapping and the consequences that almost did them all in. They had been frantic as they searched for clues to her location and Gil had lost his temper trying to interrogate the suspect in the case, a very disturbed woman named Natalie. It was Nick and Sofia that found Sara in the desert and the whole team hovered at the hospital until they knew she would survive. It broke their hearts a few months later when she burned out and left in the middle of the night. Catherine saw the effects on Gil and worried that it might be too much for him. He felt responsible. Sara was a member of his team and so, his responsibility. They had all grown to love her and her disappearance into the night weighed heavily on them. After a few months, she began to send e-mails and everyone's mood lightened.

Through it all Gil and Catherine depended on one another. Their bond had grown over the years until those who knew them saw them as almost one entity. Even when they were apart, it seemed there was an invisible string that kept them connected.

In one of her e-mails to Gil, Sara commented that she hoped one day she would find someone with whom she could have a relationship like the one he and Catherine shared. Then she commented that while she understood that he and Catherine had such a close bond, she had never understood why.

Gil replied to her e-mail:

_My dear friend,_

_You ask a question which I can truly answer only in my heart. It is true that on the surface Catherine and I don't seem to have much in common, besides a houseful of children of course. I could explain how our differences make us both stronger. Or I could do a self analysis and tell you that I need her to make me whole. Or I could simply say that my world is a brighter place with her in it. But as I contemplate an answer to your question, I can recall an answer I gave her many years ago that is even truer now than it was then. So many reasons, my dear. So many reasons…_

_Finis_

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I hoped you enjoyed the stroy. I began it as a story with chapters but not this many. There are other chpters that bubbled through my brain but there are also other ideas for other stories bubbling. And so it ends. Please leave reviews. They hlep me measure how well written it might be. And thank you for sticking it out until the not so bitter end!


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